How to overcome FOMO?

[Anonymous]

I work as a server which means evenings and weekends re pretty much taken away from me, there are a lot of benefits to working as a server for me including great tips but considering everyone I know gets their weekends the most important being my boyfriend , and I’m in a bit of the party stage of life I’m trying to find a way with being okay with missing out sometimes what are some encouraging thoughts I can tell myself to feel better about this

[MrHopper]

My suggestion would be to try to make it work some how, i worked with a girl who used to work at a holiday resort for adults where every weekend was a party, she hated where we worked because of what you said and missed out on all her friends. She didn't stay and went back and was far happier.

From my own experience i would say its never as good as it seems, its like Instagram, look at the eyes most the time you can see bored people! :D... Its like Christmas, it seems all amazing then come Christmas day you be bored out your skull and then its over.

[MCheetah]

Spend one weekend "not missing out," and realize that it's not what it's cracked up to be, and that you're not missing much. I kinda feel this way about dating and relationships, but all of my male friends back in the US are now married and they all tell me how miserable they all are being locked down, but that they're too afraid or unwilling to leave her and be single again.

[Alwayreckles93]

Take your job seriously. Honestly people like you give managers a hard time.

[ZXCwWRQWz]

How about just doing stuff so awesome that you're starting to fear for others missing out if you don't invite them?

[Asker]

Haha I love this !!

[Asker]

And realistically I do fill up my time off with great experiences I think I’m always looking at the party’s as the worst thing to miss out on when in reality when I’m there , all I’m really missing is the chaos

[ZXCwWRQWz]

I'm admittedly a skewed case of this. When I was a bachelor left at least, I'm doing all the fun stuff. Karaoke in front of hundreds of people, sky dividing, bungee jumping, and traveling to new places. I had the opposite of FOMO in a sense. But I did appreciate it when friends wanted to tag along with me even though I'm the type to try to talk them out of it.

I had a "Fear "of Not Including People Enough", like FONIE. I just liked to go out and do things and I saw it boring and tedious to wait on everyone else. But maybe our extremes can balance each other out a bit.

[ZXCwWRQWz]

I sometimes wonder with my friends what I'm missing. My "FONIE" (or FONIPE) way gets bored at Karaoke Boxes listening to us friends sing the same songs we've heard before a hundred times over.

So I prefer to say, "Hey guys, I'm bored! Let's go to Karaoke bar where we can sing not in private, but publically in front of everyone!" But sometimes I lose a few friends who want to stay in the box. But I don't think I'm missing out on anything. They're singing the same old songs together with each other. My thing is like the FONIE thing (Fear of Not Including Enough).

[ZXCwWRQWz]

But my extreme case is that I feel like the power of new experience rests at my fingertips. FOMO as I understand is like you feel it rests in other people. So there is maybe a balance between our two extremes that is healthy. But for you, I would encourage you to feel more powerful at your fingertips. You can be the god of your own experiences. There is no missing out because you drive your destiny. As for me, I'm probably in need of some humility realizing I don't control as much as I do, and the best life experiences are found through just tagging along with my friends and colleagues.

[Asker]

I never really thought about flipping it around like this and I love the idea thanks so much!

[ZXCwWRQWz]

Cheers and good luck! I recommend home parties in your case. You have a lot of control. And even if your place is very modest, it's fine. Just cozy it up with beers or snacks or a fun TV show or movie to watch or games to play or whatever. The power is in your fingertips.

[slatyb]

No matter what job you perform, you are going to be missing out on something while having opportunities for some things that are unavailable to others. For example, I work M-F and miss out on the chance to go skiing on weekdays when the slopes are uncrowded.

[girlalove]

I am still experiencing this at age 29.