How do you handle hypocrisy in the work place?

[Anonymous]

I started a new job a couple months ago and for the most part this job and this company has many good qualities about it. it’s not my dream job by any means but the work environment makes up for it.

That being said, here are the things that have rubbed me the wrong way since starting:

1.) a few weeks in I was given a copy of their employee handbook. One of the policies in the handbook was that we are “not allowed to discuss our pay with coworkers and it is a fireable offense”. I didn’t say anything at the time but I was put off because that is illegal.

2.) I had a couple of trips planned before I took the job and submitted for time off for them and was approved. After those absences me and another coworker were both pulled into a meeting with our manager and HR to discuss our attendance AT THE SAME TIME TOGETHER.

3.) At later date I was sent home sick from work and ended up having to take the next day off as well… which led to being pulled into another meeting the manager. He printed out the spread sheet and showed me all the highlighted absences and “partial work days”. I was confused by the partial work days because I was showing up to work at the same time or before as my manager, taking only my allotted lunch time, and leaving after my dismissal time. I was informed that although the office doesn’t open until 9:00 and our morning meeting is at 8:45 our start time is at 8:00.

this week I decided to show up at 7:50. And I started to pay attention to when everyone else in the office arrives. My other coworkers don’t usually arrive until 8:15 or later (some much later) and my manager never arrived before 8:30 if that. In addition everyone including my manager frequently leaves early or takes long lunches a couple times a week. I also began to pay attention to the distribution of work load as I keep getting things added on to mine. It is looking to me to be very uneven and unfair.

I want to know the best way to hopefully resolve these issues without quittin

[Luv2BRealExotic13]

They’re trying to get rid of you. You’re excelling in your work more than they are. It’s called “Constructive Firing” or putting you on a “PIP (performance improvement plan)”.

I went through something similar at an office job. They couldn’t get me on attendance. I looked at my handbook studied it front to back. After that they intentionally started miscommunications towards me to make me look like I was screwing up tasks or not listening. I took it to putting 90% written communication. When they’d make verbal requests I’d send follow-up emails outlining the interaction. Make notes. Then they descended the harassment, abuse, internet gang-stalking, and at times physical assault.

I came across attorneys on the internet like AttorneyRyan and PaigeSparks both are practicing attorneys, they have instagram and YouTube on talking about employment law. They also have templates and help you navigate especially companies that gate-kept HR like my former job. I positioned myself to be an admin for HR since we didn’t have a physical person. I studied OSHA, Federal and State employment laws in the state I was working in. I stayed on my p’s and q’s covered my butt every step of the way. It was hard, to the point I had to ramp up talk therapy appointments from once a week to three times a week. They tried to break my mind so bad and I was partially brainwashed that I wouldn’t find anything better. My colleagues would yell racial and sexist slurs to me daily and sometimes even throw objects at me. I was looking for another job in between as well bc a toxic company will get rid of you before you think you’ll implement change. The only hitch was whether I reported to HR or not they weren’t just going to let me go in peace. There was a pattern of women that refused to sleep with, take advances from management, or refused to sexually entertain someone friends with management were labeled as crazy troublemaking harlots. The most talented admins that left because of mistreatment ended up coming back to work there months later. My best friend is so supportive. My sister had some good suggestions too I learned to be a wordsmith from her. Ultimately they tried to say I was crazy bc it got real and scared people started recanting the statements as if they didn’t happen. The problem is they did and they were signed. They couldn’t do anything but label me as the company snitch and excommunicate me. I really didn’t care because it was the right and ethical thing to do. My courage gave others a chance to speak up and we all can’t be crazy. I was fired on FMLA. I hope your situation is not nearly as extremely dire and abusive. I wish you courage and support in whichever you choose whether it’s leaving, staying and reporting, or roughing it out until they fire you and you collect unemployment. At least if you stay till they fire you it’s easier to prove constructive firing. I cannot express enough writing, emails, documentation and screenshotting everything bc proof will definitely save you in the end.

[Telekinetic-Potato]

Ya tbis^ definitely take as much evidence as possible. If you want to keep the job. Make friends and copy what they're doing

[Anonymous]

Step 1: read the company handbook cover to cover. Make notes, highlight that thing, make soft inquiries with HR if you have one, but above all, make 100% sure, you are doing your job and how! The first thing a company will do is fire you, if you're the type of employee to come in a little late, or not file reports on time because that's the easy route on their end for "troublesome employees asking too many questions". They can't sack you, if you're literally doing your job.

Step 2: meet with your boss and inquire about your employee performance. This is literally so that you can make sure that by his/her account, s/he has given you the steps to succeed at your job and that you have made all effort to be the best employee you can be. Consider this insurance because they can't say later down the road, "you never cared about this job," or "we never saw you putting in effort." Nope, this will be your blue print for not only yourself but to confirm that others aren't up to snuff in the same positions if they aren't being held to the standard you're being told.

Step 3: If there is a method for which employees must file complaints, make sure you know what that is and follow and document that adventure from step A to Z, and if you can, make sure you have witnesses available to backup this process should you need it. For example, can I meet with (boss) and (2nd to boss) to discuss xyz.

Step 4: Document everything. If you see hypocritical standards, make notes. Do be careful though--legally speaking when it comes to audio/video recordings, its generally illegal to leave a device behind to record or if your handbook says, due to privacy/legal reasons, recordings/pictures cannot be made at the job, you may find yourself in legal trouble.

Step 5: Have a back up plan. Should you be fired or need to leave the job, do you have enough savings, do you have another job you can find, or even ask yourself if it's truly worth it to stay there or look for some place else. A lot of people feel like they have to stay at a job, and employers will often make it seem like, this is the only choice you can make, but you can look elsewhere.

[KostasKouvalis]

I think my job had that policy about discussing pay as well, but literally everyone discussed it and no one ever enforced it. It makes me think they pay certain people more for the same position.

There was hypocrisy in my work place too. Unfortunately, more often then not supervisors, especially the ones who get promoted to supervisor from a lower position, suddenly think the rules no longer apply to them. My new supervisor singled me out for using profanity, when literally every single person who works there, including HIM uses profanity. Another time he wouldn't give me the name of someone who snitched on me, but when he got snitched on, he went and yelled at the ladies who snitched on him. Another girl when she was in MY department committed worse fireable offenses than ME, then when she got promoted had the nerve to lecture me on violating policy. Her family also had to be friends with the supervisor and he moved her from maintenance to MY department, which is technically a lower position, but kept paying her the maintance wage, and he just interviewed her over the phone, when when I reapplied, I needed to be interviewed as a formality.

And what you said about skipping work, something similar happened to my buddy. One of the supervisors would send him home everytime he asked, then he was talking about how he's always skipping work.

But one of the best was when they ended my season early 'cuz I asked for two weeks off to go to Europe, even though I earned those vacation days. But the tranny who was taking time off to get a dick sewn on, didn't get taken off the scheudle

I ended up just getting myself fired. Those kinds of people are the absolute. If there's someone higher up then him, you should report him. The problem is, you often don't know how deep the nepotism runs. But I also know there are places you can call to report abuse in the workplace.

[Oliverlogan263]

Here are a couple suggestions for how to handle the hypocrisy at work:

First, I would start documenting everything - specific dates and times of when your coworkers and manager come/go vs your schedule. Get hard proof.

Since discussing pay is against policy, I wouldn't bring that up directly. But you can express your other concerns in a calm, professional manner.

Ask for a meeting with your manager one-on-one. Remind them of your strong performance so far. Then politely yet firmly point out the double standards regarding attendance monitoring and workload distribution you've observed.

Bring your documentation as evidence, but don't accuse. Frame it as wanting to have an open dialogue and ensure fair treatment of all employees per company policy.

Suggest implementing a standardized schedule and timesheet for everyone so workloads can be assessed objectively. Offer to help come up with a solution.

If no changes happen, you may have to take it to HR. But give your manager a chance to do right by you first. Stay optimistic but firm that two sets of rules isn't right. Hopefully they'll listen to valid feedback.

Let me know how it goes! Sticking up for yourself respectfully is the best approach here. Don't put up with hypocrisy if you don't have to.

[RavVid]

It seems unfair to be criticized for absenteeism when you weren't informed of morning meetings and for prearranged leave. A second aspect is it doesn't seem the left hand and right are coordinated. Plus it seems they asking for an extra hour from you.

I'd say diary these aspects for self protection.

If this is your first job, I'd say suck it up for a while to get experience and a working record under your belt. Then look for better. Potential employers probably would not like to see a short time in a job. Overall look to the future.

With workload it is very hard to argue that one. The manager can just say you aren't efficient as the others. Hard to say much without knowing your work. His long lunches are also hard as he might be meeting other managers for all you know and might be working lunches

Is there any cronyism between manager and workers because watch out if there is. Expect anything to get back which is always the best policy.

[mobiusforniner]

Welcome to being a working professional. Write down what you do on a daily basis, not necessarily as “evidence”, but as good practice for your own consistency and observations. Is there anything you can do about hypocrisy? Right now? Eh, not likely. Keep your head level and fly the straight course. Mean what you say and say what you mean. Be one person. You will get loaded with stuff. You will have people who’ll try to sack you. You will feel hopeless and challenged. You can’t control what others do, you can only control yourself. Refrain from reacting; choose to respond. And remember sometimes “no” or just silence, is a complete response. Reward those who help you, especially the lessers or juniors in your company. Because when shit hits the fan, they’ll be the ones backing you up. And when opportunity knocks, open the door

[luvstoned4him]

It's the same thing that I've experienced at my workplace. Favoritism and Nepotism at best. After so many reports and calls in the office I snapped and told them my mind. Not the smart thing to do but I had it up to here and of course that lead to me being written up. So now I've decided to document everything and take pics where needed because I would bring the whole establishment with me if they ever think of throwing me under bus.

[genericname85]

1: i'd dare my employer to actually fire me for that reason. then get a lawyer, cause talking about pay is absolutely legal and firing someone for doing that absolutely isn't legal.

2: i'd just wait and see what theyd be asking me. cause even if i did spend a vacation with a coworker, that's none of their business.

3: i'm not getting it. how can there be a meeting before the office has even opened? and what's the officail starting time in your contract?

[JesseP1nk]

You better fire your boss for being late to work! 🤷🤷🤷🤷

We are so fucked. People like her will start to pay out pensions one day... They probably won't actually... since they take sick days and are concerned how much other people get paid.

[Anonymous]

I’ve been left out of work chats in separate private chats and then I’d be in the dark about work tasks. I’d be frowned at for not keeping up when I didn’t know what was even going on. I’d cry on my way to work and my way home, I’d have my eye wide open in the dark before trying to sleep just worrying about how they’ll come at me again.
I cold quit because it kept happening and even when I spoke to HR, she some how suddenly quit.
I don’t work with butt kissers fk that sht

[integrale77]

You want to ask for your job description in writing and clearly defined working hours, holiday entitlement and breaks

[DishLady]

Smile, set up an appt and team the idiots with the double standard.

[noohair]

I have learned that I accept the corporate culture that is there or I find another job and leave. The one time I pushed up against corporate culture, I got crushed.

[Ladsin2]

I don’t care much what other people do. As long as I’m being taken care of and I like my job what other people do or say is their business.

[Anonymous]

Ask warren buffett he's the biggest hypocrite there is in the workforce