How you deal with work etiquette situations?

[Midgetmcwidget]

My manager introduced me to another manager today, I said the appropriate how do you, as the junior in the conversation I didn’t offer a handshake because that would be inappropriate, he just looked at we and didn’t say anything. He didn’t say how do you do back. Anyone had this?

[PeteBy]

I wouldn't sweat it. Me personally I'd just nod a brief acknowledgement and then turn away and ignore both of them. In order to be respected as my boss you have to earn the respect. I've yet to have a boss worthy of respect. However. I digress. If he doesn't offer a hand as a friendly gesture then don't feel it's necessary to beat yourself up over it.

He may be higher management but that just means he is on more money. It doesn't mean he actually knows what he is doing. So see if he earns your respect before starting to let etiquette get in the way.

If anything he showed disrespect by not engaging with you. A happy workforce is a healthy workforce.

[hahahmm]

I once said hello to a higher up in my company.. he was several bosses up but I also saw him in meetings once a week. So I say hello & he totally ignores me with a dead stare on his face. I then said something like, "Is everything okay?" Then his look changed to more normal and he half smiled. I think he just had a lot on his mind. Years later he wrote me a really good review when I left the company and we've been in touch a few times & everything is good. So you never know.

[Midgetmcwidget]

I tried to reach out to a manager after I saw him drive past me on the road I live on, he then turned up at my car as I have a land rover and he was in a Range Rover. My mum was in the car at the time and made him jump, a few days later I found this out wrote to him apologised for making him jump, he got a manager to say it wasn’t him and I was mistaking told 4-5 time during the conversation that we wasn’t going to reply (never expected a reply) and that I was mistaken. The manager told everyone in the office made it into something it’s not and making my life difficult. All I wanted was to chat about cars but I guess he’s too high up for that conversation.

[hahahmm]

It's probably a case of him being where he shouldn't be. Like one time I had a manager who was happily engaged to his long term girlfriend & was always talking about her and has her pictures all over. So one day I find him somewhere with a totally different woman & I say hello. He introduces her as his girlfriend. I play along & never mentioned it to ANYBODY, ever. Ha ha. So maybe the guy you saw was supposed to be home with his wife and 3 kids or something but instead was driving to his girlfriend's place or something & even if you don't know it, *he* knows it and is acting weird about it. Might want to forget what you saw. As silly as it sounds.

[Midgetmcwidget]

Yea I’m trying to but work are causing issues. This was about 2 months ago and the managers are still causing issues by not letting the situation move on.

[hahahmm]

Been in your situation before too.. a manager got butt hurt and then was out to get me. Luckily I had spent a business quarter working under another manager (short term transfer) and that other manager had zero issues with me and loved me so I could use him as a reference. I could never use my actual boss who I worked with for years because I couldn't trust that he'd give an honest review. So if I'm in your shoes I would look to transfer to work for a manager who hasn't been acting weird OR just look for a new job asap. Make sure you have some co-worker friends who you trust to give you a good reference too because a co-worker reference is better than nothing,

[hahahmm]

Oh, and this was 20+ years ago. Still on good terms with the manager who liked me... and also I have talked to some other managers who were friends with the bad one. Never have heard 1 peep from the azzhole manager.

[Midgetmcwidget]

Yes have applied yesterday, fingers crossed

[Koneko911]

A handshake isn't inappropriate. Sorry but if they think they're too fucking above someone for a handshake they're an asshole

[jengeorge26]

As a submissive woman, I would do what is expected, I would shake his hand but not make eye contact with him.

[Chazmatazz269]

There is no “etiquette” on a job. Jobs have “protocols and practices”. An entirely different set of rules.

[abc3643]

You should have done the handshake. You ALWAYS do the handshake.

[Midgetmcwidget]

I normally pay lower my head in respect.

[abc3643]

Where are you?
In the US, you do the handshake regardless.

[Midgetmcwidget]

United Kingdom

[NathanDavis]

down here, we're quite relaxed about that stuff... it doesn't really matter much

[KrakenAttackin]

Maybe he is stressed about having a woman as a subordinate as you can #MeToo him with a phone call.

[blissinanarchy1]

Why is it that every time I read what you say, it has something to do with how the straight white male is being attacked

[Midgetmcwidget]

Doubt that it was only for an hour?

[KrakenAttackin]

@blissinanarchy1 I doubt you would understand what it is to be a straight white male.

[blissinanarchy1]

Well, every single ancestrial background I have is from
europe… I only like women. So probably. Are you projecting to compensate?

[hahahmm]

@blissinanarchy1 This is absolutely not just a "straight white male" issue but even if it were, that doesn't mean it's unimportant. Just like I'm sure you wouldn't claim a "straight white female"''s concerns are unimportant.

[ArtemisSilver]

Sounds like a right git. You shoulda just krumped him then and there to establish yourself as da new boss.

[d3n0939]

It is normal. You just made a gesture and that is it.

[Midgetmcwidget]

Yesterday a guy needed to get past me and did so facing my instead of turning his back to me. Has the world gone crazy.

[d3n0939]

lol, it is since a long time. by the way, you forgot to answer me yesterday. Well, it ended up being a mess

[Midgetmcwidget]

Sorry so busy last night needing to apply for a position. Applied today for a new job

[d3n0939]

All the best with that!

It is okay. the thing is over now.

[Midgetmcwidget]

Ow no what happened?

[d3n0939]

Check my last questions

[bowenw]

I've encountered this. Some a-holes believe a job title makes them better than others.

[maximumpower]

Consult Miss Manners for best guidance on etiquette.
If establishment is formal and you wish to put best foot forward, its better safe than sorry.