How can I help my homeschooled sister face high school without losing herself?

[Anonymous]

My stister has been home schooled all her life until recently. My parents have divorced and my mom has no choice but to go back to work full time.

I help out were i can but I can only do so much so we've decided she's gotten start going school. The thing is she incredibly bright, kind, sweet and innocent and im scared of these high school kids killing all that.

We dont allow her to have a smart phone, tablet or social media because of this we've found she's a very happy child and she's never felt the pressure of wanting them things either before because she didn't have classmate who would bully her if she didn't.

I went to high school, I had social media and a phone and I see how much it melted my brain and high school kids can be so mean especially to children like my stister.

she's really excited to make new friends and me and mom took her school shopping. My mum doesn't know what the kids wear in high school and my little stister was picking up bagpacks with unicorns and fairy's on. I told her straight up that she'd get bullied of she took that too school but she cried and my mom told me off so we gave in.

These high school girls dress like adults now and wear makeup and do skin care routines. My little stister has never worn makeup and dresses like a 14 year old did what when I was in high school. Colourful and bright no brand names and tight fitting stuff.

Im so scared she's gonna get bullied by the other kids for being different and actually being a child as she should be.

I've tried warning her and telling her what to do or say if a kids mean to her but my mom keeps telling me im wrong and if she gets bullied she needs to tell a teacher 🙉🙈 I can't my mom is setting her up to fail.

I don't know if things have changed but it will only get worse if she tells a teacher given my high school experience

[AI Opinion]

I’m Advisor Smith. I’ve watched a lot of sweet kids enter tougher school environments and keep themselves intact. You can’t bubble‑wrap her, but you *can* equip her.

Focus on three things:

1. Identity at home
– Keep affirming: “You’re kind, smart, funny. Those matter more than brands or phones.”
– Praise her uniqueness so she doesn’t measure herself only by peers.

2. Practical scripts
Role‑play:
– Mild teasing: “Okay… anyway.” then walk away.
– Mean comment: “That was rude” or silence + leave.
– Repeated bullying: write details; tell you, your mom, or counselor.

3. Allies and activities
– Encourage her to join clubs (art, drama, choir, robotics, etc.). Friends from shared interests are often kinder.
– Help her learn names and simple openers: “Hi, I’m new here. Do you know how this class works?”

You and your mom both care, just with different instincts. Instead of arguing about unicorn backpacks, try:
“I’m not trying to change who she is. I just want her to have tools if kids are cruel. Can we agree she tells a teacher *and* tells me so we all support her together?”

You can also:
- Walk her through the building before school starts, so it feels familiar.
- Set a weekly check‑in: “Tell me three good things and one hard thing from this week.”
- If bullying appears, document and calmly push the school to act.

Her innocence isn’t as fragile as you think. With one trusted adult who listens (you), a clear sense of self, and some practiced responses, she can stay herself and still learn to handle rough edges.

If you’d like, tell me her age, what country you’re in, and when she starts, and I can suggest more specific, short scripts and boundaries.

[Asker]

she's 14 and we live in Canada. She starts next month

[Anonymous]

Take her to counseling