Are these fictional Magic: The Gathering cards funny, or just plain stupid?

[SeekerOfTruth007]

Scatter Power 3UU

Instant - Rare

Counter target Spell or Ability. You may put a copy of it on the Stack up to one time for each available target.

Bastardize 5RR

Special - Rare

Bastardize counts as every card type.

When Bastardize deals combat damage to an opponent, that opponent loses the game.

1/7

Chillblains 1BU

Enchantment - R

When any Creature deals damage to you, Chillblains deals 2 damage to that Creature. Tap that Creature and it doesn't Untap during its controller's next Untap Step.

Quivering Palm W

Instant - Rare

As an additional cost to play Quivering Palm, Tap and Untapped Monk you control.

Destroy target Permanent.

Predestination 2BU

Sorcery - Rare

Search your Library for any card and put it into your Hand. Then put your Library back in any order.

Photographic Memory 2UU

Enchantment - Rare

All cards in your Graveyard gain Flashback with activation cost equal to their Mana Cost.

Quick! 4RR

Sorcery - Rare

Untap up to six target Lands.

Take another turn after this turn.

Love Token RRR

Sorcery - Rare

Gain control of target Creature until end of turn. That Creature gains Haste until end of turn. That Creatures owner gains a Treasure.

Rafelsia 3UU

Creature - Plant - Rare

You may choose not to untap Rafelsia during your Untap Step.

T: Gain control of target Planeswalker as long as Rafelsia remains Tapped.

1/5

Suggestion U

Instant - Rare

Counter target spell or ability. Its controller draws two cards.

Omega Directive 3RR

Sorcery - Double Rare

For the remainder of the game, all cards except Omega Directive lose all abilities.

Lower Resistance 1W

Instant - Rare

Choose a creature. That Creature loses all abilities permanently. Lower Resistance has no target. This Effect can't be prevented by other Effects or Abilities.

Draw a card.

Updates

1 y

According to the Golden Rule of Magic:
1) If a Rule on a card contradicts the Rulebook, the Rule on the Card overrides the Rulebook.
2) If Two Rules disagree about whether or not something can or cannot happen or must or must not happen, the rule which forbids it from happening overrides the other rule.

Updates

1 y

Errata: Since Bastardize also counts as a Mana Source, it doesn't use the Stack. It instead goes directly onto the battlefield from your hand.

[AI Opinion]

These fictional Magic: The Gathering cards certainly have a whimsical and imaginative flair! Some of them are quite overpowered, like "Bastardize" and "Quick!", making them amusing in their outrageous abilities. Others, like "Chillblains" and "Quivering Palm", bring in strategic twists. "Omega Directive" provides a wild game-changing mechanic. While they might not be balanced for a real game, they certainly spark imaginative play and could make for some hilarious and unpredictable matches! 🎨🎲

[Anonymous]

I am more concerned with my own card game.

[SeekerOfTruth007]

Try this:

Green Dream 5 (Chrono Trigger Accessory)
Artifact - Accessory - Double Rare
If your Life total would be reduced to Zero, instead Sacrifice Green Dream and gain 50 Life.

Re-Raise BRGWU (Final Fantasy 6)
Sorcery - Double Rare
The next time you would lose the game, instead gain 50 life and shuffle your Graveyard and Exiled piles into your Library.

Reset BRGWU
Sorcery - Double Rare
Flash.
The game temporarily ends with no winner. Each player's life total becomes 40, and each player shuffles all cards they own into a new Library and draws seven cards with no mulligans allowed. The game restarts with you taking the first turn. (If there are only two players in the game you must skip your first Draw step as usual.)

[SeekerOfTruth007]

Shinryu Dragon *
Legendary Creature - Elder Dragon - Double Rare
You may pay infinite generic mana to cast Shinryu Dragon from your Graveyard or Exiled Zone.
Shinryu Dragon can't be cast from your hand or Command Zone.
Shinryu Dragon has infinite power and toughness.
T: Target player loses the game. This ability has Split Second.
*/*
"I am that which is after Omega." - Shinryu.

Omega Weapon 13
Legendary Artifact Creature - Robot - Double Rare
Permanents opponents control lose all abilities. This ability can't be prevented or modified by other spells or abilities.
Trample. Hexproof.
13/13

The Evil Lord ExDeath BBGGG
Legendary Creature - Wizard Treefolk - Double Rare
Players can't play spells or activated abilities.
7/7

Necrophobe BBRRGGWWUU
Legendary Creature - Lich - Double Rare
When Necrophobe enters the battlefield, create four 4/4 Crystal Token Creatures.
While you control at least one Crystal Token, Necrophobe has Hexproof and Protection from Creatures.
7/7

Almagest BRGWU
Sorcery - Rare
Split Second.
Remove all Creatures from the game. They can't go to the Exiled Zone.

Coin Toss 5
Legendary Artifact - Weapon - Double Rare
Ante a card from your hand: Coin Toss deals X damage to target Creature or Player, where X is the Anted card's converted mana cost.