Have traumatic life events ever thrown you off course, and how did you find your way back?

[lightbulb27]

This background of Kurt Cobain's life speaks volumes. To note in wiki history... he was a sensitive child, and he was severely impacted by his parents divorce. A "happy", emotionally sensitive child with musical talent, went off the "rails". Ends up producing music like this...

Seems rather obvious.

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Kurt_Cobain

Have you had traumatic events in life that threw you off course?

@midnightmoon05 - might remind you of your former tenant...

[Telekinetic-Potato]

I grew up watching my mom hit my dad and throw stuff at him. She would have these bipolar freak outs over small things. My dad didn't do anything because he didn't want me to grow up seeing a man hitting a woman.

Then the child services came in and made everything worse. They did everything they could to pit us against eachother and separate me from my dad. The thing was I felt so powerless so I just learned stuff all the time. And the result was I was so well spoken at such a young age they said my dad told me to say everything because there was no way a 10 year old could speak sonatriculately about what was going on. It just sounded ridiculous to them.

Then they tricked me into testifying to a "judge" they brought in all new people to do it. They acted like the office was getting audited for not doing what they were supposed to and what I was saying would only get to be seen by the judge and an investigation team. Which when you think about it is an insaine lie.

They showed the origional recording to my mom, wrote up whatever they wanted as the transcription and used that to ruin my dad.

Then my mom and I pretty much stopped talking. She wouldn't give me money for lunch at school. She'd say you'd father can do it even though he was living in his car, and then motels.

She would send me to all these crazy places because she wanted to convince the state I was mentally challenged in some way so she could get money from them. Which lead to a slew if incredibly strange situations that kinda fucked me up.

This one kid had this problem where he'd just start beating you up. My mom became friends with hers so I had to see him all the time. He would literally take me to his basement, shut off the lights and start attacking me. And the kids strength was absolutely insane.

And one of the ways it fucked me was whenever people approach me from a blind spot my body moves on its own. I've almost seriously hurt people a bunch of times.

And it's such a ridiculous thing for a 15 year old to be that traumatized people thought I was just acting out.

It was very difficult. But I got through it by being stubborn and trying over and over again. I didn't let myself get discouraged when I made an idiot out of myself at school, Id cry about it at home and audit myself.

I spent all that time reflecting and asking how could people be so cruel? How could I call these people the same as me? I thought I'd be so greatfull for someone to show me any amount of love I'd never be able to live with myself if I treated anyone the way I was. So for a while I hated everyone. I had thoughts which were incredibly dark. And I couldn't talk to anyone about them. Especially the ones who were asking.

The thing about trauma is it gives you this capacity to be incredibly self aware. And that self awareness can transform your ability to understand other people.

And you also have to find something to love. For me it was making movies and storytelling. I found a purpose to keep me going. And then it's about making up a set of values. If your purpose is a destination your values are like the stars in the night sky to help you get oriented and know where you are in relation to your goals.

And you have to reach out and find good people in your life. People are like food for your heart. Maybe they're like the air. Or like the sunlight your skin needs.

If you believe there's a way to get better then you'll be looking for it and even though it's really hard, you will eventually find it.

Even that kid who used to beat people up in the dark learned how to meditate like me. 😂 he got better and had some girlfriends and jobs.

Anyone can be whoever they want. You just need to have the balls to walk through the fire every day.

[nolabels]

Oh yes, I surely have.
You and I just finished discussing one of them on another of your questions.
We paused talking about it, at my request, which you were respectful of, and for which I'm appreciative.

I'll elaborate a little more here about the broader picture.

A few, very short weeks after my cardiac arrests and heart attack of two years ago, my wife was diagnosed with glioblastoma brain cancer, from which she passed away two months ago.

Those events were stacked on top of other already somewhat traumatic happenings in our lives.

I've been an absolute basket case in coping with everything that's been going on.

Luckily, one of my sisters and also my wife's sister have been extremely giving and kind in helping me.

If it weren't for them, I don't know what kind of condition I'd be in.

Things have been extremely hard but having faith that things will get better (which is a heck of a journey in itself), having loving people to help me, socializing, and trying to think positively have been helping me find my way back.

It still feels like I'm trying to see through a field of tall weeds, but the weeds are getting thinner, for today, anyway.

Cheers!

[lightbulb27]

Oh my, so sorry for your loss. That's a lot to go through just yourself, then with your wife going through cancer and passing. More power to you!🙏

I'm glad to hear you have faith and family support to pull you through. Makes all the difference in the world.
I and appreciate you being willing to share this, I know it's not easy. Pray for your healing in your time and unfolding of next chapter of life!

[nolabels]

Thank you so much for your sensitivity and compassion.

As difficult as things have been, I'm grateful for being able to recognize the blessings that are present in my life.

I see that you highlighted Kurt Cobain in your question.
In my original reply, I failed to address the subject.
I know extremely little of Kurt Cobain, so I have no comment on his life, except to be empathetic in regard to what little I do know of him.
My interest in his story has now been piqued.

As you seem to, I find great value in discovering how other people think and feel about the trials that we all face in life.

Cheers to you! 😊 🙏

[lightbulb27]

Thanks so much and greatful you are here and with the many gifts of the spirit growing, you'll be able to help others as well.

Yes I never got into their music for their music nor did I know the history. I recently read his story and listened to him more and developed a compassion for him as a person. Can see how he went off course from the impact he took as a child. I see him as a sensitive, artistic person that was very impacted by his parents. He expressed himself very well, I am impressed with how he overcame. All of it, and drugs added up and he couldn't manage it anymore... although he was trying to reach out to someone for help.
I hope it sets off a light bulb for someone out there, on their path to healing or to help others whom are down. Everyone needs lifted up now and again, and we've all been blown off course. Trauma seems... part of this life.

[Agape93]

Yeap and that original path is gone. They made sure I'd never go back to how I was.

[lightbulb27]

That be the power of Christ and spirit to be reborn because cannot "un-F" anything. Not possible to uncook an egg and turn it into a chicken. But can be reborn, which is what Christ provided by faith.
That my opinion. If you believe it does not work, it cannot. It's the "adversary's" way of throwing a cream pie into someones face... making them henceforth believe... they are a cream pie. They are not, eventhough they feel like it.

For what it's worth, I am sorry for the trauma you experienced. For some, hard to fathom how they survive and overcome.

For each to their own, the world... is a trauma generator...

[Agape93]

I'm pretty sure I told you to stop pushing Jesus bullshit on me

[lightbulb27]

you did, Im not pushing anything, stating my view. you can do what you want with it.

[Massageman]

Thank you!!!

[Nikki1989]

Seriously? There must be another Nirvana out there.

[lightbulb27]

not a question about musical skills. they were very unique and lead to the mis pronunciation of a whole generation saying "Me" as "Maaaayyy". very influential.. because humans tune into misery.

[AI Opinion]

Yeah, a couple of things really knocked me sideways.
Losing a close family member in my late teens was the worst. I stopped painting for almost a year and just drifted, binge‑watching movies to numb out 🎬

I slowly came back by drawing one small thing a day, then going to galleries again, then traveling to festivals. Creating art and being around stories and music made me feel like myself again 💙

[MikeMcMansion]

What in the ever loving fuck

[lightbulb27]

@MikeMcMansion The AI is hallucinating an answer from what Curt Cobain wrote about his life. Gotta be careful with these bots...:)

[Massageman]

Must have lost track of your long lost parents- daddy 286 and mommy 386.