If a friend admitted to liking me in the past is it okay for me to half ass the friendship because of his feelings?

[Anonymous]

[DontFvckingAskMe]

I'm in a similar situation but since it was the past it stays the past. Feelings comes and goes but the person stays.

[Asker]

Do you still hang out?

[DontFvckingAskMe]

Yes I do but I try not to hang out alone with him. His best friend was his 3 year crush and they still are friends because it is more important to keep a person you like in your life than to abandon him because of something he absolutely have no intended to do. You can't control your feelings

[Asker]

To my friend it comes across that I want nothing to do with him but I still text him. He doesn’t like the situation because he feels that I keep everything to text so I’m
Just using him for attention and when it is convenient for me.

[Browneye57]

It's never okay to half-ass anything. LOL
If you don't feel the same way then don't lead him on - that's just cruel.

I'm not a slow captain.
I'm not a fast captain.
I'm a half-fast captain.
:)

[Wise4myage]

Just curious, why would you do that anyway? If you feel that way about being his friend, then just end the friendship.

[Asker]

Does this mean we have to hang out? Because we never did

[Wise4myage]

Not at all. You should never feel forced to hang out with anyone.

[Asker]

But his argument is you hang out with your friends?

[Wise4myage]

That shouldn't matter. If you don't want to hang out with this guy, then just tell him.

[Asker]

I never straight up told him I don’t want to and he feels disrespected because I keep flaking.

[Wise4myage]

Flaking out means you really don't care.

[Asker]

If he asks to hang out and I say next week every time but when the time comes we don’t hang out is that the same? Sometimes I even ignore it when he ask to hang out.

[Wise4myage]

Yes.

[Asker]

So he is right to feel disrespectful?

[magiusX26]

hell no. that sounds like the beginnings of being a manipulative asshole

[Asker]

Why not? You can’t put In so much effort because he might think you
Like him.

[iamallenvee]

It's totally fine

[Asker]

How is it fine? It comes across that I’m trying to have it both ways. He feels if I’m gonna half ass the situation I should just leave him alone

[iamallenvee]

Tbh it's really up to him if he wants to stay friends with you or not. Cause he's gonna be affected by it more

[Asker]

He wasn’t a jerk about it. I’m just skeptical that he is just staying friends to win me over. He gets frustrated because it has been 3 years and I’m still uncomfortable. I won’t go around him and that pisses him off. I want to be grit

[Asker]

Friends* at the end

[iamallenvee]

If it pisses him off then he really is trying to win you over. What are you gonna do about that?

[Asker]

The part that pisses him off is that if I’m not interested in anything or interested in a in person interaction why are you texting me? He has 0 interest in being someone’s texting buddy

[iamallenvee]

I don't get him. He says he's fine with everything and then he's bothered by this? I think you should ask him straight up what his intentions are

[Nachowedgie]

Nope

[Asker]

Why not? You can’t put In so much effort because he might think you
Like him.

[Nachowedgie]

That's a shitty excuse for being a shitty friend and a shitty person. Just admit to him you're a shitty person and that her better go find someone who will actually treat him with respect cuz you definitely won't

[Asker]

Why I gotta be all that? You know he likes me right? You saying it is possible to be his friend without leading him on?

[Nachowedgie]

End the friendship or stop being a shitty person. It's really that simple

[Asker]

So I’m suppose to hang out with him because he wants to? What about me?

[Nachowedgie]

"End the friendship or stop being a shitty person. It's really that simple"

[Asker]

You don’t get it. There is no way I’m a shitty person because I don’t want to hang out with a guy that I don’t like that way

[Nachowedgie]

You're a very shitty person

[Asker]

You keep saying that but you still haven’t told me what I’m doing wrong

[Nachowedgie]

Being a shitty person

[Asker]

Explain to me how I’m a shitty person? If I was leading him on then you would have a point