Although the two are often confused, guidance and control are not the same. Control is exercised to overpower a person, and uses fear as its main tactic; guidance is used to empower someone, and uses knowledge as its foundation.
It's ok to be honest, this isn't to judge, hurt, or make anyone look bad this is a serious conversation that NEEDS to happen for many reason.
I have seen many kids be aggressive, sad, even scared at my highschool (that I graduated from) I saw a few kids go to the consolers for help about what goes on at home. some stories you wouldn't believe, also on the news about parents being evil to their kids went they are frustrated and angry.
This world looks very scary for the next generation and after me cause some parents teachings aren't right like their minds. All I am saying is, a lot of parents need to do better at parenting not at ALL saying their is only one way to parent which is good. but to stop and think "does this work for my kid (s)" Put your feelings a side for this, if you feel yourself get any other emotions that won't be useful please do the right thing and DONT answer the question.
I only want mature answer for this, if you don't wanna answer the question I advice you to speak your mind on your views about guidance vs control for ANY topic.
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+1 y
by the way:I don't need to be a parent to know about children behavior. i don't know much but I know enough and seen and heard things.
I can have a long discussion about this topic. but you said you don’t want questions. So you want people to agree parents are not parenting their kids. I agree 💯… most are not…there are a lot of good, healthy parents I know, meet, see… their kids are doing great.
people can have sex once they become of age.. but there are no parenting classes or manuals to go by once
I raised my little sister started at 13. She is 11 years younger. I am raising my two kids
I also work with children for over 20 years. so I can share a lot, personally, professionally. but I can’t ask you anything so I will stop here. That comment is immature.
I never said you couldn't say questions. i said to the guy you should ask ME questions. i said that cause I already know where he was going with the question. i conversation is only about learning from others I never said that.
The immature comment isn't i only did ask for an answer. i said that to the guy cause he was being ignorant so I shut him down. if your going to ask a question like that than it's best if you don't reply.
Cause if I make a suggestion people will start saying "what does she know, she just a teenager" or "your not a parent so why would we listen to you". I really don't care about people's opinions and judgement on me I just don't feel like hearing it. i have seen and heard a few good things but I feel like my voice won't be heard casue people make negative calls on teenagers as a group. i would too but if am asking you to hear me out I would like that respect and I will give it back to those who give it.
I completely agree with you. Parents really need to find a less controlling way. If you are good to kids since beginning they they would be good to you and the world too. If you are controlling then they learn the same thing and become controlling parents themselves and this outdated and stressing parenting methods go on.
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Anonymous
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Most parents are SO receptive to a lecture on parenting from an 18 year-old!
I felt really bad for some of the students in my highschool that was dealing with problems at home. i made this question for an eye opener for parents to see if they actually understand what they are going cause I would hate to see kids grow up in terrible conditions. i don't care about comments that isn't mature enough to handle this topic, but I understand why they would feel that way.
It's why I treat my niece far differently from how I was raised. I make it really clear she is very much still young. But I let her make her own choices. When it comes to things and instil a proper level of Independence. ^.^ I'm not a parent though. But my style of I guess looking after a little one is a bit more hands off. Go to the store give her a 20 dollars tell her she can buy some junk food if she wants but if she's smart she would save some of the money. XD. Level of guidance.
As to how I get her to keep her room clean. I just point out she won't lose things. If the room is clean. And ever since it's just her bed that ends up. A toy fille mess XD.
People believe that being mean to your kids is the best thing to do. some parents say they should listen to them no matter the tone they have towards the kids as long they listen. children will listen as long as you show authority with a serious tone (not yelling or anger) if you see that your child is not listening than your doing something wrong. parents will regret it went they are old and need someone to take care of them.
As long as it works for you that good. people make it seem like am trying to teach a parent how to parent which isn't what the question not I was implying. never said "this is how you do it" or " don't do it that way!" All I ask was do you know the difference. i said "their is no Right way to parent all I am saying do you know what guidance and control is cause I am trying to help the next generation cause the kids are my school show that their parents need help with their kids.
That's false, you can have authority in your voice and I believe they will listen I do it with my cousins all the time and my auntie wonders why they listen to me.
Are you asking me to say your right or just to find out if Walmart really does close at 7? I said this before I am not hear to argue with parents or ANY adult. i just want mature answers and JUST a conversation no questions is necessary except for what I've asked for. if your feelings are not put aside please don't reply I don't care if anyone comments it will always be up. all am doing is asking the question no need for a question like that.
@bennies_819 kids are more likely to listen to other people then there own parents. They want to test their parents to see what they can and can't get away with. Other people they are too scared to do that with/also have no reason to do so. Your cousins are purely listening to you cuz they have no reason to test your limits.
@ArtemisSilver and I def agree there is no benefit to raising soft kids. One day they will have to face the real world and will need to be ready for it
@Apple1996 my cousins listen to me cause I used authority the way they would listen. they would yell, cry even hit me I would use the method some parents use to get them to listen. i am not their parents which I don't want to be I use do it to help out my aunt and uncle went they need space for themselves. so they do test me, your saying this like since I am younger they will listen which isn't true at all. they aren't that easy to take care of, but they are manageable. i put in the work so I get my results.
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