REAL friends, excluding “followers” and FB “friends”. More than acquaintances like classmates, coworkers and neighbors. People who would cancel plans to be there for you, help you move, and tell you the truth even when it hurts. People who will bail you out of jail even if you had a major disagreement earlier that same day. Then they’d warn you to not do something so stoopid again or maybe they won’t bail you out next time (but you both know they would). Friends are the family we actually get to choose. How many of those people can you count on?
No, sadly the older I get, the less friends I have. I have plenty of acquaintances, work friends, and people I associate with regularly. But as for people I can rely on and be myself around... or someone I can call in an emergency that would drop anything to help me?
Nope.
I can count said people on one hand- and unfortunately most of said friends are long distance or online (yes, they do count). Not that I am opposed to making more friends, it's just hard finding real friends nowadays, especially the older you get. Now add being single, no kids (most women my age have kids so we have little in common to discuss), and not having the same hobbies as most people my age- that makes meeting new people even harder... outside of social media and online.
It IS harder to make friends as we get older! ESPECIALLY if we’ve chosen the single life! But i’m picky about people too. It often seems like people i don’t much like want to be my friend, and people i want to be friends with don’t much like me! Ell oh ell!
Damn, I don't know about you but I wouldn't expect my friends to drop pre-made plans for me. I respect we all have lives.
I have a handful - I'll be honest, I don't keep a count. That gives high school FB friend count competition vibes.
Even my overseas friends make time for me to care for me. I got COVID last month and they all took turns "handing me off" online to each other as timezones changed so I had someone to talk to. They streamed games or we watched shows together. In town friends texted often and some dropped off supplies while I was in quarantine.
I'm real lucky to have my friends. They're my found family and I love em for it.
I am a high ranking executive. Im popular in my job and private life. Deapite this, I have one real friend. Everyone else close to me has hurt me or wanted to use me for their own gain.
That’s unfortunate. I appreciate that quote from “Guardians of the Galaxy 2” in which Drax tells Mantis that he’s glad he’s ugly because beautiful people never really know who’s really their friend and who’s just using them. I suppose being successful is similar in that way.
Zero. I don't talk to anyone outside of work other than my family. I sound like a social loser but I'm fine with it. I don't need friends as long as I have my family.
So, you’re giving of yourself, unguarded enough that people can really know you, but you don’t retain friends for long? If i’m getting that right, is it your choice they don’t stick around or theirs? If i’m way off base, i’d like to better understand. Cuz this seems kind of a lot like me.
I had two long time friends. Down to one now. All the other ones I can't get them to do anything with me other than respond to text messages. Was thinking about this earlier how in my age range people get married and have kids then their wolves keep them on a short leash and hardly let them leave the house.
Nah i deaded that shit for good in 2019. I had real friends i had 30 something good friends in life ranging from when i was age 3 to age 24. Half of the friendships ended when i moved away in 2007. The other half was fallin like dominos after college. Im glad the Lord got those toxic people out of my life. And im glad he got my toxic ass out of theirs 😂 It was long overdue and two wrongs dont make a right although in almost always right
Absolutely and happily. They annoy me after 2 hours of being around then and they always expect phone calls and checkups. Im not putting that much effort into someone that im not dating
And they try to visit uninvited. I sit there and stare threw the window and refuse to open the door. shouldn't have come over. I don't know friends just dont mean that much. I wish them health and happiness but dont bother me too often
Some people like to hurt people. Mostly people who don’t much like other people really like hurting other people. You’ve just admitted to not much liking other people. I think it’s a safe bet! Ell oh ell!
That’s fine. I’m saying it for you, cuz the completion of that logic is completely nonsensical. If you like something, there is no time limit on your experience of it. The best you can say is you “kinda” like it. If you only like it for an hour or two out of your day, you don’t much like it at all. An hour or two a week? You DO NOT like that shit! Ell oh ell! You’re just putting up with it, on VERY limited terms.
Circumstance. I have had nothing but HELL for the time I have been alive. My mother is the major cause of me not having anyone like that... Every friend I had ever made was driven away because of my mother and the friends I do have are dumb asses and Fair-weather friends (as my grandma would say)
yeah no probably about it. But I am searching for good friends... too bad I am not really sure about where to look for them, find them, or keep them as friends... but I will figure it out... I hope
I'm glad you said you can "count" on because that's what's friendship to me, not the people I hangout with, 1, maybe 2 I'm not sure yet but the first guy has shown more than a few times that when shit goes down I can rely on him
Not really I have 2 ride or dies that have been with me through thick and thin and 3 other friends that I’m not super close to; at least not as close as we once were. We’re all busy, have our own lives to live so occasional check in but we’re not close enough to comfortably go on a trip.
I think that’s pretty common. Frankly, that’s what got me thinking about this. I’ve always prided myself on having just a few close friends. As they fall away, i’m finding myself with none. Moreover, it’s VERY difficult to make new friends as an adult male with no wife and kids.
My best friends live ten thousand miles from me. They are three men I've known 30 years now. I'd drop everything to help them and I know they'd do the same for me because in 30 years that's happened with each of them between 2am & 4am at least once. I should say each of us, not them.
For years I was the only single between us. We had one key point in common. Our Faith. After 30 years together as friends we're like brothers and I know we'd all take a bullet for each other.
There are a lot of people who consider themselves my friends, but I never see them, and we dont really keep contact, so I think by my definition I have like 4-5 friends.
Used to but most moved away to other cities and started families. Some of them had kids who were assholes and didn’t like getting thumped by my kids who take Muy Thai kickboxing
Nope, people see my face and tend to judge before knowing me, I used to think I had friends but learned way too late that they way they treated me was not how friends treat each other
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