Is having a “disability” a reason to be rude to someone?

[Anonymous]

My friend speaks what’s on her mind, no matter how hurtful/rude it may come across. I talked to her about this (because she made a comment towards me that was rude) and her response was, “I can’t control how you perceive what I say. I’m autistic” Here’s where I have an issue with that; my friend has never been formally diagnosed. She based her diagnosis on the fact that one of her other friends has autism (has been formally diagnosed) and they share the same quirks. So, I feel like she uses her “autism” as an excuse to treat people unkindly, because whenever someone says something hurtful/rude to her, she gets extremely upset and either stops talking to that person, or becomes petty. But, when she says something rude/hurtful to other people, and they confront her about it, she uses her “autism” as a way to justify her actions. I’ve talked to her about this, and we can’t see eye to eye, so I don’t know what to do.

[Anonymous]

For starters, I wouldn’t be dealing with her if she simply self diagnosed herself with autism, otherwise she just using that word as an excuse to have no filter and take no accountability for her actions. To answer your question more directly, not everyone on the spectrum who is diagnosed with the same disability with have the same behavior. I actually dated an autistic guy for 2 years and he never gave his opinion unless you asked, wasn’t an asshole like your friend (no offense) and was just super non confrontational and nice, so as you can see he’s not quite like your friend. Regardless, just recognize that you don’t owe her your loyalty. Verbal and mental abuse doesn’t have to be tolerated just because you’re trying to navigate her undiagnosed autism. If she’s that hurtful, rude and disrespectful then cut her off.

[Pleaznhim4me]

Uh I don’t think so. I have a disability and I actually try really hard to not be bitter because of it.

[Guy13]

Challenge her to go to psychiatrist or psychologist for formal medical diagnosis. For her own health and well being……

[NotTacocaT6969]

She doesn’t have autism, she’s a rotten attention seeker who sees the disabilities of others as mere excuse she can use to her own advantage.