If you suspect someone has been dishonest, how many if any chances, do you give them to come clean 🧼 ?

Question

I chose family & friends bc there’s no “ALL PEOPLE, ALL RELATIONSHIPS” & the Q isn’t meant to be gender or type of relationship specific, but is ‘meant to be all inclusive, to all types…This is why in my humble opinion, we really need a neutral BEHAVIOR or psychology category 👀🤷🏻‍♀️

CrazyGirl2 · Accepted Answer

Obviously it depends what the context is. I’ve been on dates where guys are CLEARLY lying about their financial status, (a typical one I get is “I’m working on an app and we are looking for venture capital, we’re close, but I expect within a year the company will be worth over a billion dollars”). It’s kind of infuriating, but if I just ended the date because the guy lied about something to try to impress me, I’d never finish a date! The ONLY guy who never lied about anything on a date was my ex-boyfriend. He was the most earnest guy I’ve ever dated.
But usually if it is something that matters I will give the person ONE chance to just tell me the truth, if he doesn’t and I 100% KNOW that he’s lying (like if he tells me he’s at home, but I’m at his house and he’s not there), It’s over!

collie22 · Accepted Answer

I don't go on about it , eventually a lie crops up

SnowedIn · Accepted Answer

I selected 2 chances because my answer on this topic is "it depends". First is the relationship. Is this someone I don't really know? Maybe they're bragging, trying to impress me, it was about the size of the fish they caught? I might let that go. But then there's bigger stuff: your best friend lies about having sex with your sibling. Or dad lies about cheating on mom. Or your husband/wife lies about messaging the cute guy who works at the pizza place. Those might determine a one chance or no chance response. In my eyes, honesty and trust are HUGE. Like, I'm more likely to forgive and work through cheating than lying.

loveslongnails · Accepted Answer

I think the severity of the deception has to be taken into account. If someone lies to you about their marital status, you dump them immediately. If someone tells you they're the head chef of a restaurant (because they want to impress you) but are really the sous chef, you might not be so hasty if everything else has been true.

I understand that for some people, even a little lie like that is a deal breaker because it's a betrayal of trust. I get that, so it's really an individual thing.

humanearth · Answer

That really depends on the reason, if its something thats stupid like say they lied about what they ate for super

Lliam · Answer

If they blatantly lied to my face about something important, I would have a hard time ever trusting them again. But I guess it would depend on what they lied about and why they lied.

I'm not a suspicious person, but if I had reason to suspect someone of dishonesty, I would wait and observe before jumping to conclusions. In the meantime, I would be a bit wary of them.

NathanDavis · Answer

depends on what it is... but I do not wait though, if something is going on... I'll bring it up and talk about, clarifying this works best for me

I do hire people for my work, so honesty is a key factor and also the most important one... so, right away, I focus on that

if people are not 100% honest or open about certain things, then I do not risk it

RealMarek · Answer

It depends. Why were they lying? What was it about? Were they being malicious, were they trying to avoid embarrassment, etc? How genuine are they when they discuss it with me if they are caught in the lie? What is the person’s track record of behavior?

ChiTown33 · Answer

This used to be a big problem for me as I despise dishonesty. But as I've gotten older I've come to realize and kind of accept how much lying is just a staple of society. I don't waste my time trying to hold people to my expectations anymore. But if you're a constant liar you'll just find me distancing myself more and more from you that's all.

Sevenpointfive · Answer

if i confront them i give them one lie. and if they lie again after that confrontation they are dead to me

GoodGuyBreakingBad · Answer

Everyone deserves a second chance but if you think it over how many times can you?

LiamJHayden · Answer

If I suspect, I confront. One chance to show me I'm wrong or admit it.

Guardian45 · Answer

3 strikes and they're OUTTA HERE!

Philyouup · Answer

2 strikes. 3rd is a door closer

EaterPeter · Answer

Four?

If you suspect someone has been dishonest, how many if any chances, do you give them to come clean 🧼 ?

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If you suspect someone has been dishonest, how many if any chances, do you give them to come clean 🧼 ?

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