Maybe I could just pick your brain for a minute?

[Anonymous]

My ex boyfriend is friends with me on Facebook. It's not a new thing, we've been fb friends for many years now.

We don't interact or talk, with the exception that he'll wish me a happy birthday every year. I'll like his happy birthday post, say thank you, but I never return the sentiment on his birthday.

Today his wife sent me a friend request and I'm not sure why. I, for the life of me, can't figure out what she'd want.

So...

Do I accept?

Do I ignore?

I thought about messaging him, but if they're having trouble, I really don't want to get in the middle of it or make it look like it's something it is absolutely not.

Thoughts?

[HollyK21]

She’s trying to snoop for sure. Usually in relationships you ask about each others ex’s, but for some women (even men) as soon as something goes wrong or insecurities get too deep, they start digging. She saw you’re still friends and is suspicious, but that’s not your problem. So my verdict is to either ignore or delete it. Ignore if you’d just feel too bad deleting her, I know some people really worry about that stuff. But honestly you don’t owe her anything, you don’t even know her, so deleting the request is 100% valid.

[Asker]

It is true, I don't know her at all. I'm thinking I'll just ignore it. Thank you so much for your thoughts.

[Zatsuma]

Please don't message him about it, that would be getting in the middle of it and so would accepting her friend request. Just delete the request & forget about it. You have nothing to loose but the drama it would have surrounded you with.

[Asker]

Got it - no messages. I'm thinking I'll just ignore it. Thank you for your thoughts.

[MementoMori777]

It's best to not involve yourself, the past should stay in the past and by involving them now, you are bringing them back to your present

[Asker]

Thanks for your thoughts, i appreciate it. Very sage advice for this over thinker. I'm thinking I'll just ignore.

[MementoMori777]

I believe it's the best choice as well

[NathanDavis]

you're already in the middle of it...

if you really want to know what she wants... then you should ask her, or see what she's about

[Asker]

Thanks for your thoughts, I appreciate it.

[Anonymous]

You’re a female. If you think about it I’m sure you can come up w a few reasons why she’d want to add you as a friend. Most women k ow what other women are thinking just as men know the same.

[Asker]

He's been my fb friend for over ten years or so - and it's been even longer than that since I've seen or talked to him. I don't understand, after all this time, why now?

There's nothing I could tell her about him that she wouldn't know better. Perhaps she's just curious about me - it just seems strange after all these years.

So anyway - do I ignore or accept?

[Opinion Owner]

I’d say ignore. I think this friendship between the two of you isn’t such a good idea. I know you probably care for him, maybe strictly platonic but I think in this situation considering you two are still friends, Theresa potential for something to happen I’m not saying you’re wrong, just put yourself in her position if you had a man who is still friends w his ex. Most women aren’t going to like that. I think this is just a recipe for disaster.

[Anonymous]

For sure don’t message him. I don’t think it’s a big deal if you accept or ignore it. That is your preference but 100% messaging him is not a good idea.

[Asker]

Thanks for your thoughts, I appreciate it. I'm thinking I'll just ignore.