What is your definition of a mother?

[Anonymous]

Please don’t think I’m coming from a mean place because I’m not. I’m hurt and there are times that I cry. I always wanted to be a mom but having to go through a process currently.

I have this cousin who just gave birth to her 5th child last month. Every year she’s pregnant. The kids always stay at her mom house ALWAYS. Her mom has to cook for her kids, clothed them, do my cousin laundry plus the kids, cook for my cousin and the kids, deliver the mail for her, babysit the kids all day, and etc. my auntie says that she feels like a “maid” and not a grandma.

My cousin currently is on a section 8 voucher. She enjoys getting her hair done, nails did, and much more. She gets her Brazilian hair done, and expensive clothing. She doesn’t work, but get assistance. Her mom pays her light bill for her as well. My auntie has to pick the kids up for school, help them with homework, and etc. they even stay the night over for school. She’s getting close to $990 in snap food benefits. Meanwhile I was cut off from snap benefits after the first month. If you make more than $1,000 a month you are ineligible.

I be in tears because she having kids just to say she’s a “mom”. She go back and forth between her child fathers in relationships. it’s so many people out here like myself who just crave that one positive pregnancy test. I just want my family especially my kids to know I’m their mom and I love them. I would love to teach my children the world. I would love to give my kids the world. The world that’s different for them and come from a light place.

[menina]

I can relate to almost everything you said. I'm sorry that you're also going through this.
My older sisters also have kids just to say that they're "mom's" and to "prove that they're women". They're irresponsible, they only care about themselves, they embarrass their kids, call them names and threat them. They don't love my nephews and nieces. It hurts me and if I could I would adopt all of them.
One of them acts exactly like your cousin, when I was reading your question I immediately thought of her.

No offense but your cousin is not a mother. She just gave birth to those children. A mother is someone who knows that another human being depends on her. Someone who protects, takes care, respects and does everything they can for the well being of their children.

It bothers me to see people who are crappy parents having babies and those who would actually love and care for their children can't have them.

I hope you become a mother. I'm sure you'll love, support and take care of your children.

[BetaBucks]

Literally: a female that has a living, biological child.

Philosophically: a female that puts the needs of children that she has taken a motherly responsibility for, above her own needs. Change the genders for "father" and it's the same thing. But it sounds like your cousin doesn't match with my philosophical decision.

[abc3643]

A computer system on-board the spacecraft Nostromo.

"The ship will automatically destruct in T-minus 5 minutes."

https://www.youtube.com/embed/jz4kXFI_VtE

[exitseven]

this is what happens when you devise a welfare system that rewards people for having more illegitimate kids. You gotta admit, the democrats really knew what they were doing.