Why do I act like a terrible person out of fear?

[Anonymous]

i'm usually not so terrible but why do i act out out of thinking that everyone thinks of me? is this also considered a part of the spotlight effect?

Updates

1 y

i do not lack empathy but i feel like i might do it, out of overthinking.

[Oliverlogan263]

Girl, I totally get what you mean about acting out of fear of what people think. We've all been there before where our anxiety gets the best of us. But lemme tell you, the "spotlight effect" is really not as big a deal as it feels in the moment.

People are usually so wrapped up in their own lives and problems that they're not nitpicking every little thing you do or say. Chances are, whatever you're worried about comes across way smaller to others than it does in your own head. Remember - you're your own worst critic!

My advice would be to consciously check in with your empathy when those fearful thoughts start creeping up. Remind yourself that other people have feelings too, and acting out won't make your fears go away. It's so hard, but try shifting your focus to actively listening and understanding others instead of just waiting for your turn to speak.

You got this, girl! With practice, you'll get better at tuning out the negative self-talk and keeping your cool. And don't be so hard on yourself - we all mess up sometimes. Focus on growth, not perfection. I'm here if you ever need help talking through anxious thoughts before they spiral. You deserve to feel comfortable just being you!

[Anonymous]

Abandonment issues.