What are the odds of a person who has struggled with discipline his/her whole life to suddenly make the drastic decision to force self discipline?

[Anonymous]

[Skinhead-1979]

A very good reason to do so.

I have never learned who to manage finances properly, and neither did I put a lot of effort in teaching myself. (various reasons for it of course).

I had around the €20,000 debt at the age of 23. I have gone through a government sponsored debt clearing program which lasted 3 years; but as soon as I came out things went wrong again and I accumulated new debts, which all have been paid off too.

In 2009 the 'Black Widow' finally allowed me to move in with her, and at the same time I was to become a father of a 1 year old girl. At the end of the year my son was also being born.

I had to change, I had to become financially responsible to be a proper, responsible father to my kids and a good partner to me ex. I am still somewhat 'Old Fashion' and I feel a man has the responsibility to take care of his family; so that also means financially of course.

For 11 years I have managed the family finances... For 5 years I did place 1/2 of the money which was left after bills and food in my ex' care because I had fallen back onto smoking weed, I know I can overdo it and thus I felt a strong need to protect my family from... well... me.

As mentioned, the ex is the ex... So the relationship didn't last; while I have of course made many mistakes, despite my ex incessant complaining money was not the issue.

But now I had to look after myself again financially. The responsibility of looking after a family has fallen away and I do tend to neglect myself. I struggled, initially, but that was simply because I only had a basic State benefit which is not sufficient to cover bills *and* put food on the table. I ran behind on some financial obligations again.

Finally I got granted disability benefits, but it had to be decided in Court. The whole application process lasted 18 months, and I had been rejected several times (it's how they work. They reject hoping you will give up)... and thus meant that I received thousands of Pounds in back payments.

I paid off all my arrears and financial obligations first; then I started to spoil myself. I had been made homeless by my ex only 2 years prior to receiving the benefits, so I had a lot of items to buy which I needed and wanted.

Now, when I get my money in: Bills are automatically taken out of my account and I do not need to take action; I reserve sufficient money for food; I buy the items I need to care for my Ferrets; I buy whatever I may need else; and the rest is 'wasted' on tattoos and weed.

Despite there certainly still being some room for improvements... I dare to say I have tremendously matured over the past 15 years.

[kylee2437]

It’s never too late. Nobody is perfect, and I. Think discipline is something most people struggle with even if the discipline I struggle with isn’t the same as yours.

[Anonymous]

Maybe they are losing important people and things in their lives. I don't know

[Opinion Owner]

It's a high chance

[Asker]

Thank you, you’ve helped my confidence 👍🏻. I wish you well.