When did you realize your parents weren't the heroes you thought they were?

Question

My mother is still my hero

ohsheeT · Accepted Answer

It was a little different for me they were both my heros

Until I was 5 years old and.. my Aunt uncle. cousins came to visit . My cousin who is 6 told me my dad was not my dad so come find out he wasn't from 5 to 10 he would beat me with a belt and when I was 10 I didn't cry one time and I told him I would never cry for him again

When I was 11 they got divorced I cried LOL
When I was 17 I had a premonition so I had to not go to work one day and go to his house and he died that day I cried that day too

I was angry because he didn't teach me enough I wasn't ready for it
Even though I didn't like him he was a hero

From 5 to 29 every guy that I would see I would look at them and wonder if that was my dad.
I learned how to read people pretty well

At 29 I met him.. at 32 went to visit because I wanted to know who I was but when I left there I realized who I didn't want to be.

And I mean that in the best ways he was a good man

2 months ago he passed away.
I think he was a hero to a lot of people

And my mom passed away last month and a half ago

We new each other but not that well..
She mostly only heard rumors of me and usually I was starting to them LOL
Because my sister and my cousin love to talk about me it could be down so I would give them something good all the time for Thanksgiving and Christmas dinners to talk about

About 3 years ago my nephew threatened my sister and my mom my mom asked me to come pick her up to take her to find a place to live I did and I took her to my house she had dementia Alzheimer's so I couldn't let her live alone so I let her move in with me which was crazy but I did it..

And she got to know who I truly was.
About 3 weeks before she passed she called me into her room and told me that I could have not turned out any better.
She said that I was nothing like what my sister or my cousin had said about me I just smiled

I was kind of embarrassed and she said thank you I said I've known it all along LOL she went on and on and I said okay thank you I have to go so I walked out of the room then she passed about 3 weeks after

I had boxes and boxes of paperwork to go through and the things that that woman did for other people totally blows me away she was definitely a hero to a lot of people including myself

I never knew that growing up but that's exactly who I am I give to so many people just up out of the blue I'm placed at the right place at the right time I guess just to help somebody or to be there for them so I have to thank her for that I have to thank her everything really. She was my hero kind and gentle I will miss her. And if I'm right and energy lasts forever it will never die and I will see her again with everybody else
My kids are my parents but they are my heroes too they've turned out very good they're just good good people and there's also a lot of people out here that are heroes..

And if you have read this down this far I would have to say that you are probably a hero too whether you know it or not

The_Confusion · Accepted Answer

Their closets broke down and I saw "homo" written on both of their faces. I must have been 20 at the time.

Razp_Sorbet · Accepted Answer

When my dad got mad at me at 15 and my 7 year old sister and just walked out without saying where he's going. I had to call him at 4 pm to ask him where he was and he was so short with me on the phone I was so confused. The power also went out that day. When he finally came home around 7pm (after my mum got home from work) the power was still out and he was angry there was no dinner for him. He tried to storm out and I had to go after him and ask wtf happened. I had no idea why he was mad. He thought that my sister and I were making fun of him, when in actuality my sister wanted to play Sims but I knew my dad didn't like it when she just sat around and played it on a weekend so I told her no. (It was on my laptop) I don't know how exactly it came across to him but I guess we were looking at each other and laughing and he thought we had some inside joke.

Lost a tad bit of respect for both of them that day. My mum didn't do anything about the whole situation.

Multiple things happened from that point. I still love them both dearly but I guess that was the day I realized they're not super human and they have feelings that get hurt easily.

Plus the more I look back on that situation and ones that have happened since I wonder how the fuck my parents are still together because they suck at communicating. My mum text me one day complaining about my dad being moody (he had just recently lost his step dad) and I was like? Talk to him?

4ngelic · Accepted Answer

when i started seeing they had flaws and weren't always right, i think that was somewhere around 6-7th grade

Juleskik67 · Answer

My Dad will always be my hero. I try to follow his examples, because everyone who knew him admired him.

Only after he died did I realise how badly he had been treated by my mum - but by then she had developed dementia, and became even worse, so I just dealt with that situation until she passed away.

It was, with dementia, not her fault, so couldn't be angry or blame her for the things she did (even though she had no filter by then and just said and did whatever was on her mind)

You can't choose your parents, but I think I inherited the right traits from my upbringing - mainly from Dad

Anonymous · Answer

One thing I will honor both my parents for is for giving me a chance to live and bringing me into this world.

I definitely have full respect my father. He gave it his all with being a father and husband in the family. Very selfless and loves his children and wife.

However my mother is a different story. She cares more about her image then what makes her family happy. And her highly critical attitude continued towards me well into my adulthood (and I am 100% independent adult). I put up a boundary with her 8 years ago and I keep our communication to a bare minimum.

FreyaRed · Answer

Soon after I started to observe behavior of people. But I didn't have any other option with a mom who had clearly an antisocial personality and dad who is just a narcissistic egomaniac. She always reminded me I destroyed her youth, because she was 10/10 and got me with 19 and my great dad disappeared for 3 years to make a stomatology study in Germany.

Chazmatazz269 · Answer

When my mother held a knife to my throat and told me that she brought me into the world and nobody would care if she took me out of it.

Due largely to her control and manipulation of me as a child, i never really had the chance to hold my father in high regard until just a few years before he died.

Unit1 · Answer

They never were.

Their abuse and toxicity started to take a heavy toll on me by the time I was just 10 years old and in 5. th grade I fell into heavy depression and everyone only concluded, that I'm an idiot with special needs and dismissed my case as a lost cause.

I don't miss it.

When did you realize your parents weren't the heroes you thought they were?

_Highway · Answer

My parents were never my hero. My dad died and my mom detached, putting herself in my step-father and her work. Left to fend for myself. The man I've become, the one I strive every day to be better for, the improve. He's my hero, he goes neglected all the time but keeps pushing. He never gives up, he sometimes falters, he puts everyeone's needs before himself. But at the end of the day, me, I'm my hero.

Apple1996 · Answer

My parents are still my heroes especially my mom she fought breast cancer 3 times so her strength is always something that I'll look up to

Telekinetic-Potato · Answer

I only ever expected them to keep a roof over my head no matter what and love me in their own fucked up way.

Love both my parents. They did everything the best way they knew how. That already makes them better than most other parents.

Anonymous · Answer

When I was in kindergarten, and my mom beat me so badly that i needed hospitalization for a month due to how badly injured I was. Or earlier than that when the person I knew as my dad essentially raped me. My parents could die tomorrow and I would not care.

LostandFound__x · Answer

Probably when I was about 21 and I realised my dad has put it in a lot of debt (I am still paying off til this day — my choice) and my mum is trying her best but she battles with mental health.

HelpfulWoman · Answer

being exposed to other households really. it made the "huh, so thats how family's work"

shailasca · Answer

When I was born and it took my mum months to figure out I was lactose intolerant…I was severely underweight before she did anything about it.
My dad has always creeped me out.. even as a kid. I look back at photos and I never look happy next to him.

Anonymous · Answer

My father got stabbed trying to protect us from a home intruder. I thought he was invisible and no bad guy could ever hurt him because he was too strong.

DeeDeeDeVour · Answer

My father will always be a hero to me. My mom is not evil but she also isn't anywhere close to being an angel or a saint.

NamerOfStars · Answer

When they sold my brother out to the slavers. Things were never the same after that. How could they be?

Crazzyyworld · Answer

I always wonder if that really helps for their children life in a positive way? I mean if the parents depend on their children they probably supportive and it is not guarantee that the children will be successful because the children will rebel anyway. So the children won’t be successful as their parents wish?

Clara4567 · Answer

My parents still are.  They are always here for me and they know how to help me if I need them.  They are amazing and If I would ever be a parent I hope to be like them.

strateguy632 · Answer

Hero saves. Mine never earned that title, willingly nor when i asked.

ManInChains · Answer

I never considered my parents heros. I considered them my parents nothing more nothing less

andreasderjuengere · Answer

It was the other way round. When I was 40 I realized that Mom had been much greater than I had thought until then. Just in time :)

Anonymous · Answer

With my mom, I always knew she was no hero. But my dad always has been the best person I know.

Texaskid1 · Answer

They were never my heroes.  They are human beings with flaws like anyone else.

beefcakebradybatson · Answer

They're still my heroes, but even as a lad I knew they, like all eight billion-plus Earthlings, were flawed humans.

Iron_Man · Answer

But they are the heroes my one and only heroes and that includes my brother

Staximus · Answer

They are still my heroes but I realized they weren't perfect.

Ladsin2 · Answer

I love them, but don't think I've ever considered them to be my heroes.

Alwayreckles93 · Answer

Momma's boy I see.

Anonymous · Answer

Never. My father was Superman until the day he died.

SweetDripp · Answer

They are the heroes I know they are ☺️

katiesmuff · Answer

They still are in my book!

itsannalee · Answer

When i realized i have some childhood trauma.

stvigor · Answer

Who’s boobs? In profile pic

exitseven · Answer

It must have been sometime in junior high school

Lokiion · Answer

Like 8

LiamJHayden · Answer

They were.

When did you realize your parents weren't the heroes you thought they were?

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