Why is the generation so okay with demonizing their parents?

[Anonymous]

The generation seems to constantly complain about what their parents or parent did or didn’t do. Then they go on to say how traumatizing and bad their childhood was. How their parents were “narcissist” and how they were the hated or “scape goated” child. They use all these new therapeutic terms that they found out about and suddenly they all resonate with them. Meanwhile they had food, clothes, shelter, love etc. Most parents may not have gotten everything right because they’re human. They’re not perfect but they didn’t get everything wrong either. I think this generation doesn’t value honoring their parents. Granted, some parents didn’t need kids and those are the ones who didn’t raise their kids at all but majority did the best they could with love.

[petitedollbabee]

It’s a tale as old as time. Every generation has something bad to say about how their parents raised them. And every older generation has something negative to say about newer generations. It’s nothing new.

[Asker]

I’m not saying it’s new. I understand the cycle lol I’m saying this generation is much more harsh on criticism than past generations were on generations before them. The most I hear older people say about us is that we’re entitled, that we feel we don’t have to work for anything and that we’re soft and undisciplined. The difference is those comments actually have truth to it. Their criticism is backed up by facts not emotions.

[Asker]

Also past generations have high respects/regards for their parents/grandparents. I never heard my mother or grandmother speak ill of the adults that came before them.

[MemeSupreme]

i feel like it's just people figuring out their own trauma or hardships from their childhood and like processing it

BUT i will say social media romanticizes everything and it's getting annoying

[Astarlessnightsky]

Sooo you mean we should praise our parents for providing the absolutely bare minimum and not let their children starve or freeze to death...

Thats setting the bar really low.

[Asker]

I never said that. You missed the whole point. This has nothing to do with praise bd justification of what they did wrong or right. It has nothing to do with praise for doing the “bare minimum” as you say but everything to do with understanding your parents were and are human. Before they had you they were young and living their life. They had to figure it out just like you had/have to once you got older and because of that they weren’t gonna get everything right. That doesn’t make them a “narcissist” or “evil”. It did not mean they hated you simply because in their mind they were protecting you and keeping you safe. Unless they sexually, emotionally (severely) or physically abused you Or allowed others to abuse you those ways. I’m almost certain your upbringing wasn’t that bad. It just wasn’t perfect as most people’s upbringing wasn’t but they were loved and safe. It’s only painted that way by most because it’s easier to blame your parents than take accountability for the part you played. You can’t be 35 years old still living with your parents, no job, no sense of independence still blaming it on the fact that they “sheltered” you too much or that they weren’t as emotionally available as you wanted them to be. Whatever reason you come up with to blame them at some point you have to let it go and turn that mirror on yourself. Granted those things can stunt you in your adult hood but blaming them for doing it out of love won’t fix it or change it. If you’re alive, healthy and a decent human being capable of recognizing your flaws, giving others grace, being forgiving etc that’s proof that they weren’t that bad.

[Asker]

Also putting therapeutic labels on everything they did or didn’t do won’t change anything either because most of them are used incorrectly and most people only have a surface level definition of those terms. All it takes is for you to remember that one time your mom or dad yelled at you and boom “I have childhood trauma” “My therapist told me etc etc etc.” but your memory somehow blocked out how your mom or dad had already told you to do something three times already. You didn’t listen. You got smart and they reacted in authoritative manner. My point being, the more hyper aware this generation becomes of such terms the more they seem to suddenly “remember” just how “bad” their childhood and their parents were. Seems odd to me. You can say “It’s easier to point out things that we weren’t aware of before because of the new terms we’ve learned But gaining new information doesn’t even work like that. Your brain has to process it and you slowly understand it. You don’t just magically become all knowing/aware of things you think you didn’t know just because you have new information and if you do it’s likely that what you “know” or how you are starting to remember your child hood and how you suddenly start to view/see your parents has no truth to it at all.

[Astarlessnightsky]

Some parents are just toxic and its good we are now talking open about it. Only this would bring a change and reflect on your own behaviour.

Traumata caused by toxic parents are real and a serious issue. Downplayig it by telling people they shouldn't use these terms is just another attempt to blaming the victim.

[Desi_Butcher]

You've got it exactly on point. Somehow, the trend of victimising oneself has seeped in and the rest is as you say.

[itsannalee]

Most of kids fault are the parents fault. That only describes how the parents raised the kids.

[Asker]

But that’s untrue. Most kids faults are not parents faults because though they’re kids, they still have their own mind/personality and with that a parent can only discipline and teach, with love, their child and hope that that helps them get along in the world.

[Asker]

The reason kids faults seem to be the parents faults is because with you being the adult and loving them you take on what they do wrong but a good parent disciplines, texted and fixed it. The only faults of children that I believe to be their parents faults are faults such as disrespect, no manners, no morals or values etc. Things like that.

[itsannalee]

I said what i said

[Asker]

Okay. I said what I said as well. If you have counter argument you could have just said that Lmaooo

[jamesgoldman]

Every generation blames the one before, Mike and the mechanics had that down in the 80's I think it was

[Anonymous]

Agree 100%. Many of today's young adults are entitled, victim-minded snowflakes who refuse to take any responsibility for themselves and instead blame everyone else for their failures.

[ImalwaysrightOK]

They don't realize how lucky they have it.

[Asker]

Tell me about it and social media is a huge blame. I almost fell into the trap of believing my childhood was sad, miserable, traumatic and that my parents were narcissists who emotionally neglected me and committed emotional incest. I cringed typing it. I started to realize just how dangerous social media and its overload of sensitive information being given out in so many ways can be. It started to make me hyper focused on my past fixated on finding out where my “childhood trauma” was. Simply because I kept coming across videos on tik tok and post on forum sites and twitter regarding childhood trauma and narcissism forgetting that social media isn’t reality. Granted, some people had dark childhoods/childhood moments and it was in fact traumatic and their parents were narcissists but when I saw more and more people creating platforms off these terms/new information. Bringing in an audience of lost people looking for answers. That’s when I knew this generation is just in a place in their lives where they’re trying to figure themselves out and rather than do that by focusing on the present they look too deeply into their past, unintentionally fabricate memories based off new things they have learned on the internet and boom. You get a generation full of complainers.

[Agape93]

Because sometimes they deserve nothing less.

[FunkyMonkee]

Which generation are we talking about?

[jahaims]

If it acts like a duck...

[Staximus]

Snowflake victim mentality