Why is it more common for men to befriend each other after a physical fight then when girls fight?

[Marblesxoxo]

Off course it depends on the fight, the reasons and there are always exceptions to the rule. Though whenever I heard about a fight against two individuals of the same sex, while the guys (even boys during their school years) can become friends afterwards, that's not really the case when school age girls and grown women fight each other.

Even me; there is no way I would befriend a woman and go for a glass of wine nor cup of Bailey after I've just physically fought her. Even worse if I were the loser in the fight, no way would I befriend a woman that just beat me in the fight. But with guys, even the loser befriends him. Why?

[Cormac995]

From what I can tell woman hold a grudge about it for some reason I don't know maybe several but when men get in fights sometimes depending on how it goes it's actually more like a duel where you can end up respecting, you're opponent. For example, if you get in a fight over a spilled drink or something and fight it out honestly you can respect the grit.

Fights are hard and they hurt obviously sometimes worse than others but there are certain codes about it. If you get in a disagreement and go too far but the guy keeps everything above the belt and doesn't take cheap shots, we can respect the fact they're fighting fair and not getting dirty with ball kicking and throat punches etc.

Men can respect even someone they hate to an extent if they know how to fight because if nothing else, he has conviction in what he does and won't just back down when people challenge him.

[Marblesxoxo]

The grudge can be that we've already established several negative feelings for that other woman and it was been accumulated. So by the time it goes from a verbal argument to an actually physical fight, we already pretty much hate each other by then. We likely hated each other even before the fight started. It's more deeper with us. So yeah just fighting her isn't going to suddenly make me like her or respect her. At least we can just stop talking to each other but become friends, not really.

[Shiprex]

Men see fighting physically as being more than just a physical altercation. It also involved emotional control as we are well aware that the physical force we could apply is able to end the life of someone and that isn't the purpose of the altercation. It's about getting to a solution for a problem.

Going through what is really a live threatening experience with another guy is a bonding experience. A bit like having sex is a life changing experience that lasts potentially for the rest of your life with a person you are very close to (children can arrive after that activity) while friendship after a battle is because the problem has been cleared and no longer has any grip on our psyche.

[Marblesxoxo]

Thank you for the explanation. Interesting. Our gender operates differently. If I had to get into a physical fight with the other woman, it means our dislike towards each other has gone too far by then.

[Shiprex]

I would agree that with girls and women, physical confrontation means the relationship is broken.
I heard a sociologist explain the difference between young boys and girls highlight this rather sadly. The situation of children allowed to play freely showed that boys would tend to engage with active competitive ventures with structural positions and expectations (the use of hierarchy was used) and. sports tended to be the outcome. When conflict arose it was seen that between boys there would be an escalation to resolve the issue such as a ball toss and such then the activity would carry on.
The interesting thing when girls were allowed free play was they tended to engage in non competitive play (hopscotch where no one loses or wins was used) and that a relationship experience was carried out of cooperation and participation that carried on until a conflict where the play tended to stop.
It maybe these are traits conditioned by culture and society on children but I would suggest that genetics and survival behaviours being carried on through humanity to promote those behaviours as more likely to bring about positive outcomes.

[JonCobretti]

I go for beers with my opponent after every amateur or Pro fight I have. It's just a guys thing.

I think it stems from the fact that fighting is a masculine trait and men have the tendency to admire and respect the display of masculine traits from other men.

So we can beat the crap out of each other in the cage but after the fight, no matter the result we develop a mutual respect and that might result in a friendship.

I have personally seen so many men in the UFC being great friends behind the scenes even though they are sworn enemies in front of the media.

[JonCobretti]

An example of this just happened in real life 2 days ago when Jiri and Jamahal Hill had drinks together after their UFC fight.

[MisterWack]

If I were in a fight with a dude, I wouldn’t befriend his ass. Same if it were a lady.

Friends don’t pick fights, they raise drinks lol

[Marblesxoxo]

Exactly. I consider a friend someone that has your back and supports you during good and bad times from the beginning, not someone you dislike and had to physically fight with.

[MisterWack]

@Marblesxoxo Exactly, fights can be dirty & bloody and someone’s going to get hurt. I’m not going to physically fight them and risk getting my ass kicked let alone befriend them lmao.
Like if it were a practice self defense lesson with a friend needing to impress their teacher or just boxing / pillow fighting for fun then sure however like a brawl is a totally different thing since a brawl probably won’t be a controlled environment with no protective gear / no holding anything back which would be unfriendly.

[glennos89]

Guys don't like to carry their hate with them for a long time. We rather burst out our emotions by physically hurting eachother to settle their differences rather then walking around with those negative feelings

[beefcakebradybatson]

It was that way during my 1913-born father's youth and young manhood, slightly less so when I was a boy and young man (I was born in 1953) and decidedly less so today because of generational differences in the way men relate and bond with their peers.

[Marblesxoxo]

Interesting. You men are indeed different creatures. I can't imagine befriending another woman after an awful fight. Fighting for us isn't usually the first resort. It's the last when things have gone far and by then, we truly dislike the other woman.

[Levin]

The emotions come out in the physical altercation.

A woman will hold on to that resentment till death do part :)

[jahaims]

Almost like men and women are different or something

[Marblesxoxo]

yeah men are really different creatures indeed

[Anonymous]

Because it's the rational thing to do. It's not guided by emotions.

[Reijen]

Sign of respect when you fight a guy.

[Marblesxoxo]

Interesting. You men are so different from us. For us it's already bad enough to get into a bad argument with the other woman. We don't like each other even before the fight started.

[Reijen]

Resentment can be there before the fight. Then it gets all released with a fight.