Have you ever wanted to fight somebody at a funeral?

[Staximus]

It doesn't get any more white trash than that now, does it? There was a barbecue after my friend's funeral and some people showed up to the barbecue that did not show up to the funeral. I wanted to fight them.

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1 y

I just kept my mouth shut and left because I did not want to make my friend's mom even more sad after she buried her son

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1 y

I was mad because people who did not attend the funeral came to the barbecue

[OlderAndWiser]

The timing of your question is quite ironic. I was estranged from my sister for the past 6 years because she repeatedly did things to set me up so she could stab me in the back and try to make me look bad to our mother. My sister was diagnosed with stage 4 liver cancer about a month ago. My younger brother and I visited her in the hospital once, to try to set aside our differences and spend some time with her.

My older brother, who is a retired Army colonel, and a complete buffoon, came to me a few days ago and told me that if I showed up at the funeral, there would be big trouble because my sister's husband (an arrogant and low class Englishman) did not want me there.

My sister died yesterday morning. My sister's husband informed my younger brother that I was not welcome at the funeral. I'm sure they would all like to have a fight but I will not give them the satisfaction. I simply won't attend the funeral.

[Staximus]

Do you think this behavior from your sister was due to mental illness? Too bad you live on the other side of the country, I would volunteer to be your bodyguard at the funeral and rub his face in the dirt.

[OlderAndWiser]

Yes, I think my sister had some mental illness and was always desperate to have approval from my mother. It was like an unresolved adolescent conflict.

I am not horribly upset about not attending the funeral. Those services are for the living, not the dead, and I have no need to show respect to her husband. At least I reached out and visited her in the hospital a few weeks ago. My conscience is clear.

[Staximus]

I'm sorry to hear about all that, it's a shame they can't act like civilized people

[OlderAndWiser]

Yes, they are acting like feuding hillbillies!

[OlderAndWiser]

Thanks for MHO!

[OneViewpoint]

Why did you want to fight them? That's an odd response. Some people can't handle death and funerals. I had an aunt who was a complete train wreck when anyone died. I'm talking screaming, wailing, dropping to the ground. The entire family agreed everyone was better off if she didn't attend the funeral. But she could be semi functional at a reception afterward.

And yeah, I've had cousins go at it at a funeral completely unrelated to the deceased. Old grudges. First time coming together in years. Drinking. Kaboom. Blood all over cheap suits, LOL.

[Staximus]

It wasn't even really a funeral, we all just sat in chairs at the park and a few people spoke about him. It was not like a super serious funeral. It's like the whole thing with "if you don't go to the wedding, don't show up at the reception" but worse.

[red-lipstick-girl]

You are absolutely right when you say that I am a Muslim, delicious food is served after every funeral, I do not eat that food because it is not the right behavior, I am surprised that this situation is in America, it is disrespectful to the dead.

[Staximus]

I was mad because people who did not attend the funeral came to the barbecue

[red-lipstick-girl]

I know you are absolutely right, I said it is the same for Muslims

[Anonymous]

I do catering at funerals. It's always black folks that start fights or won't pay the bill.

[EmmiL]

Never that's fucked up

[Panthero80]

I think you made the right choice.