Is my sister-in-law being selfish about inheriting my in-laws’ house?

[Anonymous]

My husbands grandparents recently passed, leaving us with there house. There house is lovely but very outdated and needs a lot of work. My husbands parents live 2 doors down. They have a beautiful 4 bed house with a massive garden. Its all very modern and spacious. My farther in law has dementia and he's unfortunately gonna have to go into a care home as its too much for my mother in law and her learning disabled brother to cope with now as he's getting violent and suffering from seizures now its only fair now but we let the professionals care for him now.

We came to the idea but we'd move my mother in law and her brother into there parents old house and myself and my husband buy my mother in laws house as im pregnant and it better to raise a family in her house and be two doors down incase we ever need each other. Plus the money we buy her house for she can use to fix up her parents house for her and her brother to live in.

We all thought this was a great idea as a family but my stister in law who lives in Manchester which is a hour and half away from us is kicking up a fuss once again. She always said when she was younger she wanted her parents house but that means nothing. She has no children and she says she doesn't want any either (thank fuck) its literally just her and her boyfriend and her many different animals.

They can barely keep up on mortgage payments now because they live on the never, never and constantly beg family for hand outs. I said what about her work in Manchester and she said shed commute and that house was promised to her as a child... like wtf.

They honestly make that house disgusting if im honest and why does childless couple who barely have the money to up keep the house want a big 4 bed house for.

They also said its not there fault me and my husband work full time and have savings because they went bag packing and only work part time.

[Just_Ken]

Selfish and greedy.

At the end of the day you aren't being taking the house for free, you are buying it and if I understand right letting them live in your old house for free. You could buy any house you want but you are buying his parents home and let's be honest you both are going to be looking after his parents a lot as they get older and she isn't.

Had a similar thing with my 3 aunts. My Grandfather died and my grandmother couldn't keep up with the mortgage payments after theyd remortgaged their house to help my three aunts start a restaurant, even though they knew nothing of the hospitality trade. Anyway the restaurant bombed (reviews were awful and sometimes hilarious) and my grand parents never got the money back. Anyway 2006 my grandmother was about to lose her home when I stepped in a got a mortgage and bought it off her. I let her live rent free up until the day she died, and I spent a lot of money, time and effort renovating it for her. It was her furniture and decor but I reroofed it, re wired it, re plumbed it, mainted the garden, installed a new heating system the works and even got her a lift put in at my own expense when she couldn't use the stairs anymore. She actually left me in her will everything in her estate out of gratitude, which was really nothing but it was nice and any money towards contributing to her head stone.

Anyway when my 3 aunts found out they said I stole their mother's house and conned her. Yet not one of them ever reached into their pockets to help. They were just greedy because they saw a financial assest. Like you say they also live on the never never despite they and their husbands making decent money.

[Iron_Man]

That’s a big problem. You’re gonna have to get a mediator and iron it out before it goes to court

[lisalikes]

Its not your, or her house yet. I always wondered why people divide up relatives stuff before they are dead.

My family is like that too. They had my great grandmas shit divided up when I was 5.

She lived till I was 15. Then left me her necklace. The rest she had sold and had a reverse mortgage on her house. She lived well. I have a $50,000 dollar emerald necklace. Just because I liked to talk to her and visit.

[Asker]

The thing is i can't say much as it isn't my family but I've been there the last 7 years for that family more than she has her whole adult life. Not but I think that owes me anything.

there's so much I could say if she wasn't my stister in law.

We all agreed on this. My mother in law is 70 and her brother is 60. Life would be a lot easier for her in her parents house. Still lovely but less maintenance. she's already paying a cleaner and gardener as she's getting too old to do the up keep now especially whilst caring for her brother. Us being there would mean she'd have better support.

She'd have her granbaby to see whenever and we literally two doors down if she needs anything. Its all about supporting each other in this situation whilst my stister in law is all mouth and glory hunting she doesn't actually do anything and her partner just hides upstairs playing video games. They just want the house for there own selfish reasons and would probably make it disgusting and get it took off them within 2 years as they have no money management

[Anonymous]

It sounds like it’s up to your husbands parents what they do with their house, but it also sounds like your sister in law and her boyfriend may not have the money to buy your in laws house even if they really want it