My best friend is hitting on my crush even though she has a boyfriend?

[Anonymous]

My friend is consistently flirting with the guy I like while she has a boyfriend in college, and we are in high school. She has a naturally flirty/friendly personality and we are both friends with him. He used to have a crush on her before. It's not like he ignores me for her, but she definitely likes to grab his attention. He's not the kind of guy I just want to "move on" with either.. What do I do? I've been kind of doing subtle flirting and just becoming friends with him. Do I step up my game? How do I do it?

[Anonymous]

okay I had a best friend like that and she turned out to be a frenemy...and I ended the friendship over years because things just added up, I didn't trust her anymore and she was a horrible person from within. every guy id talk to shed flirt with and take him away from me she was ruining my social life and my sanity. she was competitive and jealous.

im 23 years old and have been through it all so here are some life lessons I wish I can go back and tell my 18 year old self:

1.) keep your love life to yourself and private, keep it a secret. don't tell other girls who your crush is, don't spread the word, keep it hidden until your dating the guy and official in a relationship. it makes things special that way and no bitch will be able to take your man away from u.

2.) if you sense the following in a friendship: jealousy, competition and envy...that friendship is doomed for hell. it won't get better, you're better off distancing yourself from that 'friend' and don't share your personal details with her. that person is no good, they will always bring you down, go behind your back, sabotage your other friendships and steal men away from you. these so called friends are TOXIC for you. because theyre not adding to your life theyre taking it all away. what good is a friend if you feel uneasy around them like you can't trust them like you feel threatened? its best to end that friendship and go make new buddies. be brave to have self respect and look out for yourself. I didn't and learned the hard way I lost all my other friends because that bitch friend of mine liked to feed on my friendships and turn them against me. cause she didn't have friends of her own.

3.) always socialize and meet new people and new friends, never commit to one best friend or one girl...u need to have different networking groups in life...friends from school, friends from work, friends from church, friends from clubs, volunteering, etc and never introduce all your friends to each other, because like I said, there can be moles who might really be against you and jealous of you on the inside, frenemies who will sabotage your friendships with others. be wise and have a life of your own, keep things private don't share too much info with that mole that you don't really trust.

4.) 3 strike rule. if that bitch or friend, hurt u, disobeyed you, crossed you, 3 times then end it right then and there. doesn't matter how long uve been friends and how you go all the way back to kindergarten forget that, forget the past, the important thing is- is this friend there for you now? can you trust them now? will they be there for you in the future? can you count on them in the future? can you date a guy without the fear she will take him away from you? you need to think about these things and make a decision otherwise ure gonna keep forgiving them and being their doormat and letting them hurt you over and over again. don't waste time like I did. just look out for yourself and find better friends. I did.

[cazza3]

If she's a naturally friendly/flirty person she may not even think she's flirting with him or that anything she's doing could be construed as flirting. Tell her straight up that you like him and that she is flirting with him and it bothers you. If she's a true friend she'll back off or at least try to change her behavior and perhaps give you a little help

[starbuck1]

Tell your friend you like him. If she's a true friend, she would stop the flirting and help you get the guy.

[Gone_But_Not_Lost]

straight and to the point.