My friend gets hit on more than me?

[Anonymous]

Just a little jealous...

When I go out with my friends I have no problem getting hit on. I get hit on all the time. Its just that I have this one friend, basically my best friend, who gets hit on more than I do. I love her to death and feel really bad for feeling jealous but I don't know what to do. A lot of my friends have told me that I'm prettier than she is, and she is really really pretty, and I agree that I am somewhat prettier than she is. But when I'm out with her every guys attention is always on her and it annoys me. She has this insane amount of confidence and apparently that's what guys find sexy? Also her boobs are bigger than mine haha. But I guess my question is how do I differentiate myself from her to guys and stop feeling jealous of my friend?

[toolt00l]

Couple things..

1. Confidence usually has nothing to do with getting hit on. How is a guy going to know if you're confident or not before he ever talks to you?

2. That being said, there's a difference between lack of confidence and being unapproachable. Guy's can't really tell your confidence based off first glance. But if you're body language comes across as unfriendly (even if its just really be not confident), you may be intimidating. I think you're mistaking her confidence for her approachability. You on the other hand, may not lack confidence, but maybe instead you just seem a little unfriendly.. Meaning quick to reject a guy if you're not interested. Your friend on the other hand may be a little nicer if she's approached to by a guy she's not interested in. Does that make sense?

3. Setting all personality and body language aside and judging purely of looks. Guys are going to approach the more attractive of the two majority of the time. HOWEVER, some guys will go for the less attractive too (because they seem less intimidating). Again though, a lot of it is approachability. You can be prettier but if you look like a (for lack of a better term) bitch, most guys won't even try. (Not saying you are one).

Long story short, it sounds like from what you're saying you're both good looking girls. But her getting hit on more than you had nothing to do with that (or maybe it does and you don't realize, I don't know). All I can say is that if you want to be approached more, you need to be approachable. Be good looking and mysterious but at the same time friendly. Remember, cute guys are going to hit on you, and really lame guys will too. But if the lame guys aren't doing anything creepy, they're not doing anything wrong right? So you can't be cold to them. If that makes sense.

[Asker]

Funny thing is that I'm the one that's nice to everyone and she is the one that comes off as/acts like the "bitch" I'm starting to think that that's just what guys want...

[toolt00l]

believe me. Guys don't want that. If you're looking to hook up with guys then they won't really give a sh*t whether you are or no. But if you want a relationship, being a bitch will get you no where.

Maybe she's getting hit on by guys who only want to hook up and you're getting hit on by guys who genuinely think you may be a cool person. It really depends on what you're looking for.

Can I ask, why are you jealous if guys are already hitting on you? What are you looking for from guys?

[toolt00l]

as in.. Do you like the attention? are you looking to mess around? Do you want to have a relationship? or what? Because your motives make a huge difference on why.

[Asker]

Neither of us are looking to hook up. What I meant to say is when I'm out without her I get hit on all the time and when I'm out with her all the attention is averted to her. I still get hit on but I feel like its her "show" she has a very dominating personality. I know you probably think this question is stupid but it makes me feel self conscious and question what's wrong with me when everything is revolving around her. I hate feeling this way because she's my best friend.

[toolt00l]

I understand. Well all I can say is I wouldn't judge your worth or confidence off of how many guys hit on you and how that number drastically decreases when you're with your friend. I mean think about it. Girls get hit on all the time, and quite honestly, she may just seem a little more approachable than you are for whatever reason. But who cares. Guys still approach you. Its not like anything is wrong with you. Its for because of the reasons I mentioned above.

[rocksongwriter]

"I have no problem getting hit on. I get hit on all the time."

Then why do you care?

[polkiju]

I'm in the exact same situation ( BFF bigger boobs more confident and outgoing and I'm a bit prettier than her) But I never really got jealous. Just a suggestion if you go out with her and you feel jealous again after when you are returning home pass by some guys (only the ones that are in groups and kind of jerks) and you'll get hit on and get you confidence back up.

[Anonymous]

I have no words... This question is simply f***ing retarded.

So what if she gets hit on? You get hit on, too. Don't be jealous, it'll just result to a fight about little things between you and your best friend, and why? Because she happens to have confidence?

Grow the f*** up.

[Anonymous]

I think your pretty shallow!

[Opinion Owner]

Your over here complaining that when she is around all the attention is averted to her, but yet you still get hit on. Do you know that they're so many people out there that don't get hit on at all, and when the put themselves out there, they get dumped on! Being forced into loneliness, now that's a problem worth sharing. Like the anon girl said below, grow the f*** up!