My oddly passionate take about the length of men's shorts...

[Anonymous]

So from my experience the length of men's shorts is oddly "controversial." Controversial in a way that women's shorts, skirts, and dresses really aren't; aside from religious/conservative communities who are against shorter lengths. From back when I was in middle school to even today men's shorts length have been and is controversial. Specifically when talking about, gasp, shorts that go above the kneecaps and even worse, gasp, shorts that show some thigh!

Back in middle school when I wore shorts slightly above my knees (and by that I mean like shorts that were literally just 1 inch above the top of my kneecap, maybe even less, like perhaps stopping immediately at the top of my kneecap) I learned very quickly from the other boys that gay didn't mean happy. I had to forcibly switch to knee-length or longer shorts or else my already hard time in middle school would become even harder due to the other boys making fun of me. And believe me, they were absolutely brutal about it and wouldn't shut up for a second. They basically taught me all the slurs pertaining to gay people that exist.

And for high school the boys still continued to make fun of above the knee shorts, though thankfully I wasn't wearing them anymore, lol.

And as for elementary school before middle school, the other boys occasionally made comments about how my shorts "looked weird" but they weren't brutal about it like middle and high schoolers. Probably because they didn't know the meaning of the word "gay" yet or what being gay implied.

Anyway though...all this drama around above the knee shorts throughout literally all of middle school and high school (and mildy throughout elementary school) made me oddly obsessed with above the knee shorts.

For the longest time I didn't wear a single pair of above the knee shorts since middle school, and had thrown out all my old pairs. However, one day my new girlfriend at the time (and still my girlfriend today) was going through all my clothes when I asked her for constructive criticism on my style, and she basically told me "All good! The only thing I'll say is your clothes need to be a little tighter and less baggy, and most important, your shorts need to be waaaaay shorter, but other than that, you're already doing great!"

And I was just like "Shorter shorts? But they used to make fun of me in middle and high school for it, brutally!" And she just laughed and was like "Middle and high school were a long time ago. Healthy, sane grown adults won't make fun of you like that. And besides, showing a little leg is extremely sexy, yum yum! Let me see those thighs!"

So we went shorts shopping the next day. We basically got a bunch of different lengths, just for the sake of trial and error. 11 inch inseam, 9 inch inseam, 7 inch inseam, 5 inch inseam, 3 inch inseam, etc. 2 inches above the knee, 4 inches, 6, etc. My girlfriend was way more visibly happy when I tried on the shorter lengths that showed more thigh.

When trying them out we started at knee-length, then gradually moved on to shorter and shorter. Whenever I tried a new length my girlfriend was like "Hmmm looks good...but what if we made them an inch or 2 shorter?"

I sort of wanted to stick with the leaning longer lengths, she wanted me to stick with the leaning shorter lengths. Like I wanted to stick close to the knee as possible, she wanted for me to go mid to upper thigh. So in the end we ended up buying a few pairs that went about 3/4 of the way down my thigh or so, like 3 or 4 inches above the top of my kneecap, so showing my lower thighs but not extremely short or anything.

When I wore those shorts in public with her when hanging out and going to different places at first I felt literally fucking naked. It had been so fucking long before I felt a breeze on any area of my leg higher up than the knees. And when I sat down I got self-conscious of the way my shorts rode up, riding up to nearly mid-thigh.

That was at first...but after a little while longer wearing those shorts, it was like oh my god, these shorts are the absolute best! Why did I ever wear shorts below my knees to begin with?! These are sooooo much more comfortable! And to top it off, they look way better too! They make my legs look longer! In comparison the long shorts make my legs look short.

Then me and my girlfriend went back to shop for more shorts...basically different lengths for different occasions. 3-4 inches above the top of my kneecap for daily use. Upper thigh for the beach, pool, the gym, etc. Mid-thigh for daily use when it's especially hot. Etc.

The attached picture above more or less summarizes the lengths I wear, minus the first one which I would never ever wear again anymore, way too long for me haha. The second one is the absolute longest I wear.

But all this got me thinking...all this controversy over shorts above the knee for what? Why are other people so obsessed with the length of your shorts anyway? It doesn't make sense.

Especially to me in my world...in my mind I prefer above the knee shorts way more than below the knee shorts, and literally can't comprehend why someone else would think otherwise. I mean logically/rationally I know people have different tastes and priorities and all, but my emotional/irrational side could never understand.

Because first of all, um...shorts above the knee look straight up hot?! Nothing sexier than long legs and full thighs. Why would you wanna cover that up? Second...the comfort and the breeze?

Arguments for long shorts could include protection against sunburns, extra pocket space, etc. I personally prefer sunscreen on my thighs over long shorts. And if I need to carry more than just my phone, wallet, keys, etc, I'll just bring a backpack as I don't like things hitting my legs as I walk.

Another bonus is I never quite realized what nice legs I had. I'm not even muscular or anything (though I am fit) but I have perfect silky smooth skin and my legs are long and straight, and I have practically zero hair on my legs (your mileage may vary, but I think less body hair looks better than more). My legs are almost as nice as my girlfriend's, though they will absolutely never be as she has the world's most perfect legs.

But yeah, um...basically yay for above the knee shorts, nay for below the knee short, lol. For perfectly middle of the knee knee-length shorts, better than below the knee obviously, but still inferior to above the knee, so still nay, lol. Thighs are awesome shorts need to show thighs! Haha.

Weird I know, but every time I see knee-length or below the knee shorts all those middle/high school memories come flying back to me. So I hate them, lol.

It's also kind of weird to think that in middle school I got shit for wearing shorts 1 inch above the knee (maybe not even) while now I wear shorts waaaaaaay shorter than that, lol. Even my absolute longest length is 3-4 inches above my knee instead of 1. Imagine how much the middle school kids would make fun of my current shorts, lol.

Overall this is probably all based on emotion more than logic but yeah, haha. End of my weird rant.

[paledreams]

It's not just the length, men, straight men these days such as myself seem to have no concept of "not wearing tight shorts that are beige or colour/colour" and also, too short. Sigh.

Whatever happen to these just on the knee or below sigh 🩳 boardshorts

[myTake Owner]

Not sure if you read the body of my post or not (I actually wouldn't blame you as it's absurdly long, 7067 characters and 1287 words total according to an online counter) but I was basically claiming the literal exact opposite of you, LOL. 😂👍

And, well, what can I say. To each their own. It's basically a completely subjective thing anyway. 🤷‍♀️

For my side of the argument, I just think it looks good when everyone shows some thigh, both women and men. See no good reason why women should only wear shorts at the top of the thigh with like a 2-3 inch inseam while men should wear shorts knee-length or longer with like a 11-13 inch or even longer inseam. Doesn't even have to be crazy short, 2-3 inches above the top of the kneecap is already good enough.

But many people (you included) basically think the complete opposite, so there's no winning or right or wrong either way, haha. 😅

[Anonymous]

I would be happy to read on it and comment if you can provide a condensed version.

[myTake Owner]

OMG FUCKING THANK YOU!!! You said it was too long, yes, but you at least acknowledged that you would like to read it, just a version that's not so long.

Unlike 2 other users here, "Female Anonymous 30-35" who just commented "tl;dr [too long; didn't read]" and EmmaMary who commented "Yawn... Sorry I fell asleep."

Nothing against them as people but I just don't see the point in commenting on someone else's post just to say it's too long. At that point just keep scrolling and avoid the post? Like I can't believe I even have to say this. 😑

But anyway, a TL;DR/condensed version for you, here we go:

TL;DR So basically back in middle school all the other boys made fun of me for wearing shorts slightly above my knees. They'd call me all sorts of variations of homosexual slurs. This made me avoid shorts any shorter than knee-length for a long ass time, like for about a literal decade or so. But as an adult my girlfriend encouraged me to wear above the knee shorts (several inches above the top of my kneecaps, too), and I did, and oh my god, they were so much better than knee-length or longer shorts!

No idea why anyone would wanna wear knee-length or longer shorts now. And no idea what above the knee shorts have to do with homosexuality anyway, and as if being gay is a bad thing anyway (I'm not gay personally, though I see nothing wrong with it).

There... hope that's short/condensed enough, haha. If it's not, tell me and I'll cut it in half once again.

[Opinion Owner]

Sorry, I didn't read that. Too long.

[myTake Owner]

🤦‍♂️Damn, uh... let's see here... okay, 😤an even shorter version:

TL;DR Basically back in middle school the other boys would relentlessly make fun of me for wearing shorts slightly above the knee, and now as an adult (as a sort of "fuck you" to them I suppose) I wear nothing but shorts above my knees, and usually a lot shorter than just "slightly" above the knee too. 😏🩳

😤PLEASE don't fucking tell me this is still too long. This is like the 3rd fucking time I've had to shorten it to make it palatable for you (and other people). 😅

[Opinion Owner]

Yeah, that's cool.

[myTake Owner]

Thanks I suppose, lol. At least I was finally able to bring it down to a readable length, which as you can tell was kind of difficult. 😅

Probably the length I should keep my posts and comments going forward, as I got 4 responses on this post, and 3/4 of the responses with the exception of paledreams' were just complaining about how long my post was. And even paledreams probably didn't read it fully, he probably just read the title and answered based on that.

[Opinion Owner]

Yeah, just try to keep your posts as short as you shorts.

[myTake Owner]

"Yeah, just try to keep your posts as short as you shorts."

Okay I gotta give it to ya, that was a GOOD one! 🤣🤣🤣👍

It unironically works really good as a rule too. Because if you take full length pants (aka my full length essays) and cut them exactly in half you get knee-length shorts (half length of my essays). Still too long. But then cut those knee-length shorts in half again you get mid-thigh length shorts (only a small fraction of my essays), just the right length, haha.

[Opinion Owner]

Dude, you think about shorts WAY too much.

Thanks for MHO.

[myTake Owner]

Considering the subject of this post and how long I made the body of this post is it really that surprising? 😅

You are certainly not wrong though. And you are certainly not the first person to tell me.

I think what I feel must be similar to those religious women covered from head to toe, but then they stop being religious and slut it out showing thighs, cleavage, everything? Except for me with the shorts, lol. I do feel like a little slut wearing shorts above the knee.

And yeah, no problem for the MHO! :D You're basically (almost) the only one who actually contributed anyway, lol.

[Opinion Owner]

Cheers

[myTake Owner]

^_^ Yeah cheers! 🍻

[lil_will_12]

Well i feel like your experiences after middle/high school should demonstrate that most people dont care lol.

i dont think its super controversial imo🤷‍♂️ for example, im on the cross country team and a ton of kids wear short shorts there (even when they are not running too)

i personally however, like to wear baggy pants lol 💀Unless its summer, or im running

[myTake Owner]

True, lol. Middle schoolers and high schoolers obsess over the most stupid shit and brutally bully you if you don't follow trends or don't fit in with your peers. Adults however (at least most sane and healthy, mature adults) don't really give a shit as they have a million other priorities. Close friends or family members might banter with you over it and/or make a comment here and there, but it's just simple teasing and nothing serious meant to degrade or humiliate you or whatever. 👍

I don't really keep up with trends in general, though it does seem these days it's more acceptable to wear short shorts than when I was in middle/high school. I imagine trends for 16 year olds are different than trends for people in their 20s, but regardless it still goes to show that people aren't afraid to wear short shorts anymore, and that short shorts aren't just exclusively for elderly people who were teens/young adults in like the 1960s/1970s. 🙏

But yeah. Everyone has their preferences, lol. But yes, exceptions when it's summer or when you're running also makes sense! :D

[yulia02]

This definitely seems like an American thing lol. Growing up where I did before moving to the States guys wearing shorter shorts (above knee) was the normal look. I never understood the real baggy look, to me that looked ridiculous. Boys making fun of boys because of the length of their shorts just seems silly to me. I’m glad you like your new look!

[myTake Owner]

Kind of surprised you found this pretty old post, but very much welcome!

Also nice to hear a woman's perspective, as before you 6 men answered, and technically 2 women as well but all those 2 women did was comment on how long this post was and how they didn't read it, so you're the first woman to leave a proper response, lol.

But yes. I've heard that from a lot of people, actually. For most other cultures shorts above the knee are preferred. An American issue indeed.

For the USA I think the issue was related to the aids epidemic that began somewhere in the 80s and/or 90s. Aids were associated with gay people. Also around the same time basketball players went from short shorts to long baggy shorts, and fashion everywhere else followed.

Other countries though thankfully didn't go through all this confusion, lol.

But yeah. The real baggy look, looks ridiculous. And yeah, it's such a weird and stupid thing to make fun of people for! And thanks, lol. Shorter shorts are easily a million times better than longer shorts.

[yulia02]

It was actually one of the first few mytakes when I clicked on fashion and beauty. Maybe I don’t have the right filter on. The same women that complain probably spend half their day on the phone but can’t be bothered to read few paragraphs 🤦🏻‍♀️
It so strange to me that people would be call gay for length of short. I don’t get it lol

[myTake Owner]

Ah, really huh? Interesting, lol. The same thing has happened to me too, though! I look up a certain topic on here, I see an interesting post, find out the post is I have no idea how long, a month ago, 6 months, perhaps even a year or more? I've seen it all, haha.

And yes, true! Even more pathetic is those 2 women are "31 years old" and "30-35 years old." You could expect a woman in her late teens and 20s to be stupid, but by their 30s usually most people should know better. By their 30s people usually have matured more, as they're past high school and college. 🤦‍♂️

And yeah, lol. It's dumb as hell, really. I don't think there's even any logic behind it, one person began to call it gay (in this case I believe Michael Jordan and the Fabulous Five basketball group as they're the ones who popularized really long shorts) and other people just followed it without questioning it, lol.

It's the same logic as calling a woman a slut for the length of her skirt/dress. It also doesn't make sense.

Just let men wear short shorts and women wear mini skirts/dresses, lol. It's not as serious as some people make it out to be.

[yulia02]

Agreed 🙂. I’ve never cared what anyone dresses like, be yourself and enjoy life!

[myTake Owner]

Yes yes yes! 🙏Your attitude SHOULD in theory be just common sense, but unfortunately a lot of people lack common sense, so your attitude is refreshing to see, lol.

I personally sort of value comfort first of all, but I also wanna look reasonably good, lol. So a good balance between the two, looking good doesn't have to be uncomfortable, etc.

My favorite outfit is literally a red fitted t-shirt and light khaki/beige fitted 7 inch inseam shorts. For footwear more or less anything goes depending on context, between shoes, sandals, flip flops, sneakers, etc. May sound extremely simple but it really flatters my body despite being so simple, and my girlfriend and a lot of other women have said so. Especially when you compare me to guys wearing like 15 inch inseam shorts, lol.

But yeah. Best to just be yourself and enjoy life no matter what! 💯

[yulia02]

Have a nice day and nice chatting with you 🙂

[myTake Owner]

You as well, haha. 🙏Always nice to encounter level headed people with more common sense! Unfortunately a rare occurance these days, but yeah. Have a good one! 🙏

[yulia02]

Oh I well aware about that. Nice chat!

[Mac-One]

I prefer shorter; about 4" inseam with proper underwear to prevent exposure.

[myTake Owner]

Late reply I know, but glad to hear! And extra emphasis on the "with proper underwear to prevent exposure."

I used to have a "friend"... well more like acquaintance I hung out with because I didn't have anyone else at the time, he was kind of weird and kind of an asshole. But either way, he would wear these extremely short shorts, like with a literal 1 inch inseam, basically same length as a speedo, with no underwear at all, and they were really wide and really loose unlined shorts so you could clearly see right up the leg holes, and he would purposely position himself so that his dick and balls would show. Like raising his knees a lot or sitting with his legs really spread out.

And he didn't give a fuck where he did this. He even did this when near children. No idea how no one confronted him directly, though I did remember some parent telling their kid "just look away hon." So glad I stopped hanging out with him soon enough.

[Anonymous]

[myTake Owner]

Um... not trying to be rude or anything, but aren't MyTakes supposed to be long? Hence the bigger character limit? Not unless I'm misunderstanding the whole spirit of MyTakes? And from what I saw lots of other MyTakes are long too, though they provided more pictures than I did.

And not trying to be rude a second time, but what's the point of commenting on my post to just say you didn't read it? Like not trying to get arrogant, but I don't understand what your intentions are here.

[DECENTSCOTTISHGUY9]

Short shorts are the best to wear if you have the body and legs for them like me

[myTake Owner]

Can't deny that, haha. It's basically the male equivalent of women showing their legs. The male equivalent of women in mini-skirts, mini-dresses, or even just regular women's short shorts.

As long as you have the body and legs for it, awesome, regardless of gender!

[DECENTSCOTTISHGUY9]

Very true nothing beats them

[beefcakebradybatson]

How 'bout Davey Dudes, we lads' equivalent of ladies' Daisy Dukes?

[myTake Owner]

Late reply I know, but hey, that's not a bad idea at all! 😂😎👍

[beefcakebradybatson]

Thanks, myTakeOwner !!!

[EmmaMary]

Yawn... Sorry I fell asleep.

[myTake Owner]

Since you and the other user "Anonymous 30-35" commented the exact same thing in slightly different words pretty much, I'll copy and past the exact same thing here:

"Um... not trying to be rude or anything, but aren't MyTakes supposed to be long? Hence the bigger character limit? Not unless I'm misunderstanding the whole spirit of MyTakes? And from what I saw lots of other MyTakes are long too, though they provided more pictures than I did."

"And not trying to be rude a second time, but what's the point of commenting on my post to just say you didn't read it? Like not trying to get arrogant, but I don't understand what your intentions are here."

Also, please don't fucking tell me any and all comments on here are just gonna be saying some variation of TL;DR, cuz that's 2 in a row already (and literally only 3 minutes apart)... hope it doesn't become a trend. 😑

[Wraith_Cemetery]

EmmaMary and Anonymous are basically outing themselves as uneducated and incapable of reading comprehension, like most middle aged and young folks these days.

[myTake Owner]

@Wraith_Cemetery Yup! Exactly! The bad part about is NOT the fact that they didn't read my post. See a post that doesn't pique your interest? Move along. Keep scrolling. Ignore it. Act like it doesn't exist. Totally fine. I myself do the same when my post doesn't interest me.

But NO. They literally just commented on my post JUST to say that it's too long and they didn't read it, literally going out of their way to let me know.

That's the equivalent of going on a YouTube video and saying "I didn't even watch the video lol." Like... what the fuck is the point? 🤦‍♂️🤦‍♂️🤦‍♂️

[DECENTSCOTTISHGUY9]

@Wraith_Cemetery very true