What does my ex making no eye contact mean?

[Anonymous]

So we go to the same college and agreed to be on good terms even though she dumped me for an immature reason before even asking me about it. So I was pretty sore at her for doing that. Went no contact for a week, she gets a new Boyfriend and says she knows he will be able to commit to her because he just got out of a 2 year relationship. She says she didn't think I would commit because I wasn't calling her all of the time, even though she never even called me once. Anyways so even after she is immature about the whole thing, I care a lot about her, so I decide to be on good terms. Went on break a week later for a month. Had no contact at all the whole break. I come back and see her o the first day of classes. Me and a mutual friend of ours walk up to her and begin to talk, she doesn't look at me once and only talks to him even when I try to get involved in the convo. I see her again after that from a distance, we make slight eye contact and she looks away and waves. I see her again after that with a couple of friends and she attempts to avoid eye contact but since she had to directly talk to me for something she looked in my eyes then would look away and be all weird about it. Then we met ran into each other one time while both of us were alone. She tried to avoid eye contact then too the same way. Then today me and another mutual friend sat with her in the cafe and she made quite a bit of eye contact but then after a few minutes she noticed and tried to keep looking away. And then she pulled out a magazine to try and not have to look up. I want to e friends with her still because I understand why she dumped me and can admit defeat, but she is being awkward. I also saw something that I saw in her eyes when we first started showing interest in each other. When she broke up with me I did not see it, so I don't know what to think about the eye contact thing. Any girls know what this is about? Any help would be greatly appreciated. Thanks a lot :).

[Anonymous]

She still really cares about you... and for most girls if we look at you... you will see the pain and the care and the love in our eyes and we don't and can't let you see that... it is admitting to ourselves and to you that we were wrong and that we are sorry... and also look at an ex that you really truly loved and cared for hurts like hell, because after you break up it is like its off limits and something you can't touch... she still loves you and still cares about you... and she is afraid you will see that if she looks at you... its easier to pretend it doesn't exist if we don't look. The reason she probably hasn't told you not to talk to her anymore is because she really loves it when you do. That officially is the only time you are in her life anymore ya know what I mean... and she can't bear to let you go for good.

[Opinion Owner]

Did I get best answer because that's what you wanted to hear? lol

[Asker]

Well she told me randomly that her new boyfriend just told her he is going into the army this summer, like it was really out of nowhere, she could have said something different but she chose to say that to me. This was before she started trying to avoid talking to me. And she says she loves him already after only a couple weeks of dating. I don't know why she would even think I want to hear about her new bf? This is a well thought out response, thank you.

[Asker]

Lol no, you got best answer because this is what seems like is going on right now and it was put together very well and well thought out.

[Opinion Owner]

Well thank you... every once in a while I try to get in touch with my feminie side and let out my thinkings and feelings : ) I want to know why is she dating a highschooler? I have nothing wrong with it I just want to know...

[Asker]

I am wondering the same thing my self. She has a lot of high school friends and she is pretty immature. She was home schooled for her whole life up until now in college. Maybe that has something to do with it. Oh and her high school friends were actually the ones who were telling her she should just dump me without even communicating what her problem was first... These were also the same friends who are like best friends with the her new bf... maybe this gives you some ideas.

[Opinion Owner]

Yes it does all the explaining is in that... people love it when they feel like everyone is on your side no matter if it was your fault or not...... yes, I in my experience...... people that are homeschooled seem to be quite a bit immature and kind of social idiots... (no offense couldn't think of a better way to put it) maybe socially she is on highschool level you know.. being home schooled doesn't allow you to have the social connection that public schooling does.

[Opinion Owner]

Sounds like her highschool friends knew this guy liked her... so they wanted to help to get them together. Maybe also she felt a little superior if she dated somebody younger ya know? or had friends that were younger..... but maybe not just thinking out loud here.

[Asker]

Right after high school I tried dating a girl in high school, but she was just too immature and didn't understand that when you are out in the real world and have a job, you can't always see the people you want every day. Plus going to college also gets in the way. This is partly what happened with my ex, she said I wasn't giving her enough attention... But she never tells me this, or even attempts to spend more time with me, as if I'm a mind reader. Just some of the immaturity I dealt with.

[Asker]

Oh and my ex didn't have a job or anything else to do while she wasn't at our college, because her dad is rich and gives her everything she wants...

[Opinion Owner]

Well then he should have bought her a slap in the face of reality in the real world and some maturity... : ) kidding...... time will only tell honey..... ride it out see what happens.

[Asker]

Thank you for all of your input. :)

[Anonymous]

Im not too sure when this was posted, but i know I'm currently going through this now. Only, I'm the one who can't seem to look at my ex for long amounts of time. There's still a lot of unresolved feelings and as much as I want to check in and make sure he's doing okay, it's physically painful for me to. I've tried and right when i get around to it, my mind shuts down and my body freaks out, lol. Its hard trying to be so "chill" after the closeness two people have experienced, i think. Its even harder if a part of you still wishes it hadn't ended.

I hope your issue has been resolved! Im hoping mine will at some point too.

[daydreamerxoxo]

She's probably not making eye contact because she feels awkward (which isn't your fault). It sounds to me like she realizes that she made a mistake by breaking up with you and now feels bad about it. And instead of apologizing she just seems to be avoiding you because she's probably embarrassed. Or, it could be that her new boyfriend doesn't want her to have contact with you. Maybe you're making it too intense for her by wanting to pursue a friendship with her..she might still have some feelings for you, another reason why she could be avoiding you, becaues she doesn't want to feel tempted.

[Asker]

I told her to tell me if she doesn't want me to talk to her anymore if it makes her uncomfortable and she still hasn't said anything about it. Actually when I told her that she said she wasn't going to stop talking to me just because she has a new boyfriend. He probably doesn't want her to talk to me, he is in high school, so he might be intimidated by me I guess. Thanks for the help :).

[daydreamerxoxo]

You're welcome :D yeah it probably is her boyfriend that's getting in the way of your friendship because if he's in high school dating a college student then he probably has all sorts of insecurities & therefore tries to be controlling..

[MaxPrime]

lol ok ok from a guys point of view

She is over you, she's out, she's done, and most importantly, she is uncomfortable around you...maybe not because of YOU per say but more of what she is reminded by (the awkward breakup...lad di da) A girl is willing to blame it all on you (I know that sounds immature) BUT it's simply how girls react, this way they don't have to think of negative thoughts about themselves, with all of the double standards that is put on them from society, ANYWHO tangent I know.

Basically get over her, and start EYE CONTACTING OTHER GIRLS, not to make her jealous but to make YOU happy...YOU my friend, YOU are the important person here...not her.

[Asker]

I see what you are saying, good point.

[TheGuineaPig]

This guy should have gotten the best. This sounds spot on

[PopMart1997]

What would guys know about how a girl is feeling? Answer: they DON’T. Which is why a female’s perspective on other female’s behavior is much more spot on and is highly respected over a male’s perspective.

[Kayne]

that would be guilt.

possibly realizing that she messed up. And trying to figure emotions out about you.

[Asker]

Guilty because she is being immature about it when I am clearly being mature and nice about it? Or guilty because she still has feelings for me and her Boyfriend probably doesn't want her talking to me? And what kind of emotions could she be trying to figure out about me? Thanks in advance :).

[Kayne]

All of the above. It could be feelings for you or immaturity.

And she's probably trying to figure out where she stands with you on an emotional basis. Like wether she actually likes you more than as a friend etc etc.

[PrickeyPear]

she might be ashamed of herself or simply feel guilty.

[unisname]

Damn we all living in a simulation, bro described my whole situation.