When a guy is just TOO shy to kiss a girl or make physical moves?

[sonic241928]

...is there any hope for getting a girlfriend?

[AvihooI]

You don't have any chance of getting into a sexual relationship without physical contact - it's as simple as that. In other words, women do not initiate physical contact unless they're previously attracted to you - even if you're an extremely good looking, strong and wealthy guy. Girls don't take charge and make progress - and that's a universal rule. In fact, if a girl does initiate contact and gets things moving from ground up, you should suspect she's been paid to do so or is seducing you for other purposes.

What you're describing is more common than people think. Being shy is comparable to not knowing how to swim - people who don't know how to swim are scared of learning to swim because they think they might drown.

Let me point out something very interesting to you - look at how you phrased your question: "When a guy is just TOO shy to kiss a girl or make physical moves?". It is obvious you were refering to yourself, yet you mentioned a spontaneous guy. You have to realise it's you who has an issue with being shy and it's just fine - there are ways to deal with it and improve drastically.

Here's what you do: Focus on communication with both girls AND guys. Start touching people when greeting them, on their shoulders, their arms, their upper backs. Start using body language and have an emotional feel to any message you have to deliver. FEEL confident and SHOW confidence - the more you show confidence the more you feel confident and vice versa.

After you are confident in your normal day socializing, it will be much easier to communicate with women you wish to get intimate with. But you have to be patient and let your confidence build from ground up.

If you want extra tips and extra clarification - feel free to message me.

Cheers.

[BillDylan]

How about you get over being shy? Its an inhibiting behaviour that closes a lot of doors for you and there is a great deal of literature about overcoming it. Talking to a psychologist is probably overkill, but you could talk to someone about it. Why are you shy? Can they think of a way for you to overcome it? And if its just this one girl, or inexperience that is causing anxiety about it, why not ask a female friend of your own to practise with? It might be weird to ask, but its amazing what people do for their friends.

[sonic241928]

It's inexperience. And I don't have anyone to talk to about it.

[KatTheGreat]

Your gonna have to do a little work. like talk to her. get her number and text her. but if you find a girl who's cool with your shyness then she'll be willing to make the first move. and after that it will get easier. just remember that your def. worth it. and if she goes out with you she likes you so it's okay to hold her hand.

[sonic241928]

Really? Are you sure she wouldn't flinch, or ask "what the hell are you doing," if I try to hold her hand? I can't think of an easy way to initiate hand-holding.

[KatTheGreat]

If ya'll are walking side by side 'accidently' brush her hand once or twice. If she doesn't move her hand out of reach GENTLY grasp it. After about a minute you can get a firmer grip. Just go in slowly. But before the actually hand holding make sure you touch her shoulder or hair let her get use to your touch but don't touch her so much to wear it's creepy. You understand?

[Anonymous]

Of course, but she'll have to be understanding or aggressive.

Understanding as in she knows you're shy and is willing to accept that and wait until you're ready

Aggressive as in she'll make the first move

[mitsy]

I'm sure you can get a girlfriend. Now from then on its gonna require some physical contact.

[sonic241928]

Can you give me specific examples of the physical contact?

[mitsy]

Thouch her offten like little things as in holding her hand, putting your hands on her waist, your lips against hers.

[sonic241928]

When do I know when these things are OK to do? How do I pull it off smoothly, so it's not awkward?

[mitsy]

When you two are alone its always ok. When your with your friends and do these thing she'll find it sweet and awesome that you were even willing to do it with your friends around, and her friends will find it sweet if you do it too. Well don't hold back if your going to kiss her then kiss her might be easier if you wait until y'all are alone.

[Killfest400]

This kind of depends. If you're too shy to initiate physical moves or kissing, then you can still get a girlfriend. She just has to know that she will be initiating a lot of stuff. If you're too shy to actually kiss her even when prompted, then there will probably not be a lot of hope.

[sonic241928]

How would I know when I'm being prompted? What if I really WANT to man up and make the moves but my shyness takes over when the time comes?

[Killfest400]

For many women, being too shy to initiate physical activity is a deal breaker. However, for the ones for whom it isn't, they will just have to get used to telling you exactly what they want (my girlfriend often does that to me, since I'm the same way as you). Chances are, as you get used to being with a girl, you will be much more willing to take charge.

[sonic241928]

I'd take charge too after the first time. It's just so intimidating to get over that first hump, it seems impossible.

[armyant]

"I want to see a man beaten to a bloody pulp with a high-heel shoved in his mouth, like an apple in the mouth of a pig." Andrea Dworkin

Try finding one of those girls. You can usually tell them apart because they say things like "I hate how feminism is thought of so badly now when really it's just about equality for everyone." If you can't bag on of those women then at that point I'd say all hope is gone.

[frustratedchump06]

I'm not shy or scared, the problem for me is getting the girl to welcome my advances

[GIntrovert]

As long as you are not to shy to talk to a girl.

[Anonymous]

Yes you have a lot of time.