Girls, is it an issue to date a guy who slept with a lot of women?

Question

This is Dre, he is an adult film actor and the talent for a very successful company. He in his own right was chosen because women prefer to work with him

Girls, is it an issue to date a guy who slept with a lot of women?

He is paid decently to preform in adult films. Meaning do things like maintain erections for hours and please women for hours on end, gets paid to perform and cream-pie women who are in their own right.. successful, beautiful and strong.

Would you have any issue maybe dating/entering a relationship/sleeping with him? Would that be an issue for you to date a guy who slept with (over 250) women?

PreMalone · Accepted Answer

I've been a relationship with a male sexual worker, and needless to say I won't do it again. The relationship was toxic, and I didn't trust him because he was still working while we were together, and I couldn't tell if he was cheating or not. I guess you'll need to clarify boundaries with your partner and some way to ensure that you're not having more than sexual relations with another woman i. e get emotionally attached. I also refused to have anything sexual to do with him because I felt like I wasn't competent enough or I couldn't match up with the women he worked with, and I felt like I couldn't keep his job separate from our relationship.

HaleyArnold · Accepted Answer

Hmmm it wouldn't be an ideal situation for girls in general.

As for my opinion, I feel like the only way I would be okay with it, is to :

1. understand the reasons why the guy chose to do this in the first place (hardships), and why he needs to continue to do it if he is still making money this way

2. Reallllllyyyy be reassured that he does not feel anything for these girls, that he wants me and a serious relationship, and that its more like any annoying job.

3. Be reassured about safety/std's.

Showdeekay · Answer

Honestly, that is a tough one.. On one hand... he is most likely going to be amazing in bed and know all the tricks of the trade... on the other hand... would he be bored of sex already? Would I be able to please him since he has had so many more partners to compare me too.. maybe a little insecure.. but ask yourself this.. could you date a girl you knew slept with 250 men? ... I couldn't date him if he was going to stay active in it.. I couldn't handle him being friends with any of the girls he made porn with either... best advice IF you truly are wanting to be in a relationship.. be honest about your past but leave out the number lol. :)

Miss_Mystique · Answer

I would have a problem with it cause it would make me insecure about myself. If he has slept with so many women then that means he is not a one woman guy. It won't mean anything because he has done it so many times before. A girl wants to feel special not one of many.

mersteriosity · Answer

The way I see it, it's just their job. It's how they make an income and they make a really good income too. When it comes to dating it matters more about the guy's personality. However, if you date a normal girl, she could be insecure or feel like she'd never pleasure you the way other pornstars do even if it's staged, so you should definitely not allow her to watch your films. Other then that, just get tested a lot and then it's just like having a separate work life balance.

askmepleaseme · Answer

I would think he has absolutely no standards and is a joke. Anyone willing to fuck anyone and anything can get out of my way of being even remotely a love interest much less a preferable sexual partner. To me it shows that the person has no taste, no self-respect, and thinks of quantity over quality. Having many sexual partners in your life is fine, but if you're telling me you did porn and it got to that extent, then I know you've been fucking with a lot of busted women which is just not attractive at all. If you like sex, totally fine, but do it with people who you choose, not people who you have access to.

Nicolio · Answer

Yeah. I mean, if that's his job, he's probably going to continue doing as such right? I couldn't be with someone that is with many other people sexually at the same time. I'm not really all that sexual either, so that plays a part as well.. And if I were to be sexual with someone, i wouldn't want someone that has sex often.. it wouldn't mean as much in my opinion and having sex in general for me is hard to even think about if it's not one specific person. For other people, they may not like it because they're afraid of being conpared.

JetJas · Answer

If it's a serious relationship then of course I would have a problem with him sleeping with other women as a job. If he wants to be with me then I wouldn't want to share his body even if he doesn't have feelings for the other women.
But I wouldn't care if it was a part of his past, as long as he wasn't doing it while he's in a relationship with me.

SnowWhiteRoseRed · Answer

I think there's plenty of women who would have no problem with it since it's work and also women can be very sexual beings as well. A woman would have to be polyamorous, plenty are, to want to be in a relationship with an adult film star which I pretty much think it means you're polyamorous as well. Sex and love are very different things, but some people want exclusivity anyway which they are entitled to. Just be honest and look for someone who isn't monogamous. If they are rude to you because of what you do, then you're better off. Having lots of sex with different people doesn't mean you're any less of a person as long as you're honest and respectful.

M_Liam · Answer

I think for many, it's difficult to feel comfortable dating/sleeping with a man who has had sex that many times. For me personally, it took me a very, very long time to feel comfortable having sex with my girlfriend before marriage, so because of my history with that, it probably wouldn't work out with me. However, for the average lady, I think if you genuinely care about her, you're clean, and you treat her right, then the number of people you've slept with shouldn't matter. That goes for dating men, too. In some of the other comments I saw you say you're entering the dating scene; I wish you the best of luck, and hope your upcoming date goes well!

Jani1234 · Answer

I mean If the guy is wanting to be in a committed relationship and he is honest and trying to be with the right one, he should make the effort and it doesn't kill to try with him, but I am spiritual If he continues that way, he can try to ignore it, but he is collecting a lot of other people's energies and it's not even good for him, spiritually, mind, and body he could get sick, if he isn't careful, it's really easy these days to get an STD, but if he wants to wipe the sleight clean and have something real, you should see if where it goes

Curiousbell · Answer

I personally would be okay with it, but I wouldn't want the details of any of it to be discussed. Just like I don't like partners talking about their exes a lot. As long as you are up front and honest about it to begin with, treat them like royalty, and act like yourself (which I hope is a good person :p) then I think you will be perfectly okay!

The person you want to be with will probably have to be confident and not be insecure though because I can see where there would be problems there

butterbiscuits · Answer

I probably wouldn't just because I'd think someone like him would be less capable of settling down with one person. If he was going to continue making the films, definitely not. If he'd stop while with me, I'd need him to prove that he can stay with just one girl somehow. I'd be really reluctant.

splishsplash07 · Answer

Considering my job takes into sexual pleasure as well, it definitely would sting seeing us both connect sexually with other people, but the real fact is that we would both have sex sometimes and it would be filled with passion and lust and loves, in which we don't I've our clients/Co workers

EmilyBenjamin · Answer

Depends. I wouldn't want to be just another person he can sleep with. And I would definitely have problems with him sleeping with others while being with me. I don't think the women would be a problem as long as he don't give then headspace in the relationship. If he wants to put it behind him, then I'm not going to stop him from having normal relationships

Curious_Curiouser · Answer

Thanks for inviting me to this debate. I would honestly say where for a girl it wouldn't stop her from dating/loving the guy if she had an interest for him, she'd always worry about it in the back of her mind. But as long as the guy doesn't have any STD's than the really shouldn't be a reason not to date him, but the guy shouldn't be surprised if every once in a while the girl he's currently dating puts the 'you slept with tons of other women" card on him since, you know, its true.

ambbrush · Answer

I mean it wouldn't be a straight off no. I would try if I felt there was something worth stay for but I was feel like I would be compared to all the other girls he had done that stuff with or something. So many i would feel insecure for a while, but I wouldn't just not give him a chance.

OhMyLeniency · Answer

I think that a lot of girls (Including myself) will fear you have done it so much you won't feel any emotion. Other than that you should have no problem getting a girl, most men have slept with quite a bit.
Also dont feel like its something you have to tell people, simply saying you are not a virgin is fine. Your past is no one elses bussiness.

FlawlessGirl33 · Answer

For me No.. For other women in general maybe. I think i would just question it.. It would just feel werid, Specially if he has done it them more than 20+ women , i would not feel special in the sexuall way. But no problem if the guy was not a adult actor just had many girlfriends before: )

AshleyBenedith · Answer

I love a guy who has experience with other women because it's always nice to have an experienced guy guiding me through everything and satisfying me professionally. But sadly 250 women is too much! It is kindoff a turn off to me I mean I wouldn't want to have sex with a horny guy who has seen hundreds of other pussies you know? in my opinion it makes him seem kinda desperate and i wouldn't feel special having sex with him

PinkT15 · Answer

Yeah, it'd bother me. I couldn't be with someone who was having sex with other people. Honestly, I wouldn't even consider being with someone like that. Simply because ik that the relationship probably wouldn't go anywhere because he probably wouldn't stop doing what he was doing and I wouldn't change my opinion about it. So, it'd just never work out.

Glitter-girl · Answer

I don't think its an issue. If there is a serious emotional connection between the two people I don't think it should matter unless the guy starts to get romantically interested in his co-stars. If there is trust in the relationship it should be able to work out, and at least he knows what he's doing lol.

NatashaJ · Answer

From my experience a man who slept with a bunch of women and tries to be an asshole to get women to sleep with him is problematic and I would never date someone like that. He has to have respect for women in order for me to want to date him. I think that what happens the most in a relationship. Also if he uses protection and checks for STDs regularly that be the second issue.

Gypsy_x · Answer

I don't ask a guy how many people he has slept with. I don't care, so long as he has practices safe sex and been tested regularly.

I would possibly have a problem with dating someone who has been in the adult film industry. I wonder if I would be horrified if someone recognised him from porn they'd watch... that being said, if we had a genuine comnection then maybe I'd be able to get over it.

CALLMELOVE · Answer

Depend on the guys. If he is an asshole than definitely not. If he is a geniuanly good guy then as long as he breaks no laws then it would be fine. If you can't accept all the baggage someone has to offer then you don't truly love them and if they don't love you, no need worrying about them.

Madison11 · Answer

It depends on the type of girl. Like I have a boyfriend in high school and he's slept with a lot of girls but it doesn't really bother me because I'm a chill girl. Only tell your girlfriend if she asks because if you just come out with it, it would seem creepy and disgusting.

ForgiveUsWeAreYoung · Answer

My boyfriend has had gf's before me and physical relations with other girls before me, and he is the first guy I have a ever even had a relationship with. He is my first everything and I will admit it doesn't make me feel bad that he has had others before me while I have had no one else before him. But it doesn't complicate things for us too much.

carleejaneZ · Answer

I would definitely try if there was a connection. I would also feel a little insecure knowing about how many beautiful woman there would be sleeping with him and I would definitely wonder if I am not good enpugh. On the bright side It would also be amazing to have sex with someone who knows all the tricks.

BabyBlu21 · Answer

This would be a problem for me, I would think that out of all the women he slept with someone is probably better than me. I understand that the past is the past, but your past do affect your future. For better and for worst! It's not that I wouldn't be able to trust him, but he might going to want to try things that I am not comfortable with.

Maebo · Answer

For me, yes.

1) all the experiences leave an expectation that is hard to compete with

2) possible ilnesses. I know there are tests but you never know

3) it no fun to know you are number 250... and more

4) I would Think you imagine and desire having sex with every woman you meet. Even if Its Just to have sex and nothing more

Im Sure Some women won't have a problem with it. Think Its a quite personal question :)

Cait_Lyn · Answer

If this was someone I was on a date with I would need more information.
However, I feel it is much more important what kind of personality this guys has than what kind of history.
It wouldn't be an immediate deal breaker for me, I believe people deserve chances to prove stigma wrong, but I would have many questions.

brownbeauty23 · Answer

I don't know. I've never dated anyone. I don't know how it feels to be loved and touched. But I think I'll be all right with it as long as he decides to do some other work. I don't want any girl to touch him as long as he's mine. I get jealous real easily. But I'm not experienced. I don't know if my opinion is Right.

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