Why do women look when I'm not looking and avoid eye contact when I am looking?

[Anonymous]

I walk through my daily life with my head up and generally looking at everyone. (Yes even men). When I see ANY woman (yes even "not good looking ones"), I have a strong sense that she knows I'm looking at her and she continues to avoid eye contact and do her thing. (look down, away, etc.)

It is often when I'm not looking and say talking on the phone, that I catch a girl walking by at the last second and Lo and Behold, she's actually looking at me.

Why do women look at me when I'm not looking at them but instinctually avoid eye contact otherwise?

When I walk down a street I'm generally scanning the entire sidewalk in front of me, rarely lost in my own world. I do this because every now and then I catch a girl looking at me and I start a conversation. I want to increase the conversations I have but I can't seem to get women looking at me unless I happen to not notice them. Wtf its like a catch 22...

[Anonymous]

Because women are shy. Or many are. I keep doing that too (looking away) especially from hot or good looking guys, I feel embarrassed. I don't blush but I have the feeling I'm blushing on the inside. Everything turns OK if they come talk to me, then there's no anxiety because I'm natural in conversations. But its this non-verbal eye contact and staring which is scary to me. Remember being sexual with a guy who is a friend, and even tho I liked him romantically, he was staring into my eyes. Felt odd. I think its someone about how close emotionally you are to a person. Looking into the eyes of my boyfriend is easy, and comfortable, but having eye contact with strangers you've had no verbal introduction to is very hard because you don't know them at all.

[Simple-Simonette]

Eye contact can be intimidating. A lot of social customs in other countries consider direct eye contact an insult or offensive. It's hard to look at people in the eye - there's a feeling of intrusion, like they are picking your brain or peering into your soul.

Some women feel direct eye contact can be considered an invitation, and they are trying to avoid inviting your advances. It might not have anything to do with you or your attractiveness. Not every woman who goes out is looking to meet potential dates.

Lastly, some people may not be avoiding anything, they are just lost in their own world, sorting through whatever flotsam and jetsam is floating around in their mind. It isn't a conscious thing. You just think it is.

[the_cheshire_cat]

*chuckles* it's primal. Making and holding eye contact in the animal world is usually a threat. Or a lead in to confrontation. To drop ones eyes is to submit to the other. (usually.) Most people are not aware of this and it's all subconscious.

Women generally do it to play coy, perhaps followed up by a fluttering of the eyelashes as she peeks back if she is interested. I know from my own experience I drop my gaze when a guy catches me looking at him. It's not entirely me being submissive (tho it is a lot) another factor is just being damned shy.

Chin up! Keep scanning the crowds. There will be some bold women who will openly stare back and tilt their jaw slightly inviting interaction. As for the others, if they drop their eyes and you feel like talking to them, nothing stopping you. Once you start, they'll look back up at you. :)

[Anonymous]

There's a few possibilities,

1) You're hot, in my own experience as a moderately attractive female, I can't even look a hot guy in the eyes cause I'm shy and my face will flush red lol. I will especially avoid eye contact if I feel them looking at me cause its embarresing, perhaps its even a submissive behavoir rooted in insticts we're no longer aware of

2) You're large or unattractive/weird looking (IM not saying those are a bad thing, so please don't take offence, but for the purpose of explaining...) People like to look at what's odd just as much as they like to look at something that's attractive. PURELY curiousity, HOWEVER because we live in a world of sensitive topics, no one wants to hurt that person's feelings by being caught staring at them, plus as a male, women don't want to give a man they're not interested in the wrong idea.

Try this, smile at them. If they glow and grin your you're probably 1, if the eyebrows turn up and the smile is crooked, you're probably 2 :)