Why does she avoid being alone with me? (after I asked her out)

[Anonymous]

I asked her out and got the friend zone treatment and she said she wanted to stay friends. It seemed like she may have started to like me, after we got to know each other more. However we usually hang out with at least one or two other people and when they leave and it is just me and her she waits a few minutes and comes up with some reason to leave. If she only wants to be friends fine but why does she have to leave every time were alone? I am tempted to say something next time she does it as its starting to peeve me off and mess with my head.

Updates

+1 y

just thought it was worth adding that we were first to spend some time alone together. this was the first time and the last time we were alone. it was quite awkward because we are used to having at least one other person there.

Updates

+1 y

i Just hate that at times she seems like she is startting to like me then goes off and does osmething like leave when were alone. guess the only thing I can do is talk to her.

Updates

+1 y

how I hate trying to figure out women out, what happened in origonal question was about a week ago. now yesterday she spent several hours alone with me under same circumstances. she was even more chatty god this is anoying.

[Anonymous]

i seen behavior similar to this before. with girls, they are comfortable making friends with each other, but generally treat boys different, its naturally to them. with girls, either they like you, they are neutral towards you, or they hate you. this is why you should have options in life and not invest in only one potential love interest in earlier stages, the chances of them all going sour are reduced.

there are a lot of possiblity and you would never know unless you are psychic. she could be player, feel uncomfortable with you because you asked her out, unstable, etc.

with girls, either she likes you or she doesn't so why not invest in the ones that like you, its that simple, save yourself the hassle of having to beat yourself up emotionally over ones that don't like you.

i had experienced mind game girls and non-mind game girls and all the sheet in between. ditch the beeches and keep the good ones. hope this helps!

[Asker]

i don't see how uncomfterable she could be as we both were doing school work and ocassionally talking. I did have several options and still do things just seemed to click so well with this one. I wish I was phychic cause everything she does could be twisted slightly either way. I feel as though it is my fault that I eneded up as a friend because I can pinpoint htings I did wrong, but I can also think of the same number of things I did right.

[Opinion Owner]

girls think different from us. you may feel its no big deal asking her out when you two have friendship, but its not unusually for a girl to act weird and act uncomfortable after you asked. they are just weird for circumstances like this.

[pleasestopme]

She's obviously uncomfortable being alone with you because she doesn't feel the same way about you. It sucks man, everyone's been through something like this. It's just awkward to be around someone that likes you when you don't feel the same way. Haven't you ever told a girl that you "still want to be friends" just so you don't hurt her feelings? But you actually don't want to be friends. It's a huge bummer of a situation, but you should just talk to her about it. Let her know that it's OK that she doesn't feel the same way, that you actually want to be friends even if it may be awkward at first. The key is talking to her about it, if you actually want to be friends.

[Asker]

well I guess I'm settling for friends I still want more but don't see it happening just odd as she acts jealous at times

[pleasestopme]

She acts jealous of other girls? Like jealous that you talk to them? That's a good thing for you, it means she cares about you, or at least wants you for herself. You guys should go to a movie, or some place where you don't really have to talk to have a good time. That way you can just laugh about that stuff together, still have a good time, and not really have any awkwardness. Make sure you both pay for separate tickets so she knows it's platonic. You need to make her want to be mor thn friends

[Asker]

yeah she gets jealous of me talking to other girls, not every one but I am friends with a lot of pretty girls. she always does something so that I know she sees me & she always smiles when she does. will go out of her way to come say hi too. not that your wrong but going alone to a movie is going to be hard when she doesn't want to hangout with me alone. or are you saying talk to her then suggest it later? just not sure what else I can do to get her to want to be more than friends.

[Asker]

just to add I do think she cares about me in some capacity just angers the sh*t out of me that she would reject me but then iterfere when I am with other girls. almost like she wnats to keep me around to feed her ego at times

[pleasestopme]

Ya, lots of people keep other people hangin around to feed their ego. Everyone likes to think they have someone who always wants them. And maybe a movie will be hard, but if you can find some kind of thing that you guys can enjoy without having to talk a ton, it'll be easier and less awkward. To be honest, if you don't think you guys will have a future, you should just end it. Tell her that being friends isn't enough for you, and if she doesn't want more then stop it.

[Asker]

she is one of those girls with a lot of guy friends but they just added to my cnfusion as even before I asked her out she would make sure I notice her, but would often just ignore the others. I have the feeling she does like me on some level from how she acts however she has got such a huge ego from all these guys, one is no longer enogh for her. I know her well enough to say that if I just did end everything saying friends are not enough she would stay around till we became friends again.

[confusedgirl239]

She leaves when you're alone because she feels awkward around you. She knows that you like her and she also knows that she doesn't return the feelings. She also may think that you might try to get with her again and she doesn't want to deal with it. Sorry. I'm sure you'll find some other girl :)

[Anonymous]

She probably just feels awkward. I really don't think it's anything against you it's just she's not sure what to say.