Between the two options below ⬇️ Which do you think would make you feel MORE like somebody DID NOT genuinely appreciate you as a person?

[VIVANT]

A. They consistently try to make plans with you (at least once a month) but barely talk to you at all when you spend time together?

B. Fill up the majority of the conversation with you nonstop but avoid making plans with with you?

And bonus Q if you can answer…. how do you think each scenario would make you feel?

A, Plans with no convo

B. Convo with no plans

Both equally.

Neither.

Other.

Updates

1 y

🤦🏻‍♀️ I WROTE IT WRONG. Of course 😏

Ok so to bring more distinction:

A. See each other often as a matter of course in familiar places. They are Talkative in your presence but they are awkward about or can't make plans with you.

B. See each other often as a matter of course in familiar places. They are awkward or Not talkative in your presence but will make plans with you.

Updates

1 y

‼️‼️‼️‼️‼️‼️‼️‼️‼️‼️

I put the update in the WRONG ORDER 🤦🏻‍♀️

For Halloween I am going as a flake 🎃 👻🤓

A.) See each other often as a matter of course in familiar places. They are awkward or Not talkative in your presence but will make plans with you.

B) See each other often as a matter of course in familiar places. They are Talkative in your presence but they are awkward about or can't make plans with you.

[KostasKouvalis]

Technically the first one, but I voted for the second one, I don't know whey they would continue to try make plans with you if you never talk when you're together. That seems like an odd and very silly thing to do. That actually happened to me. We talked online, but barely talked when we met up in person, and neither of us tried to make serious plans with each other again. So I think that option is kind of silly because literally no one would do that.

The second one seems more feasable, which is why I voted for that one. This is the one that usually happens to me. The person will be friendly but doesn't necessarily want to be my friend or hang out outside of work/school.

I think someone who genuinely appreciates you will want to both spend time with you and talk to you

[VIVANT]

No I can’t see a person making plans with someone who doesn’t talk to them but I can see a person who is nervous still trying to make plans with the other person.

I don't know some people feel like talking will be easier if they know in advice and have some privacy 🤷🏻‍♀️

[Maybe_Maybe_not]

Plans but no convo - Is totally weird to me, why are they planning anything when there is nothing to relate to, since there isn't anything said, then there is no relation, it is just two people physically in the same place, and one is making plans for what❓What is this sorcery ❓

Convos but no plans - Phrased like that, it feels like what I'm doing, I rarely have a plan at all in mind, it's improvisation and/or clueless about plans, not feeling awkward, not avoiding plans though, it's just my daily life since some time already, so I'm used to that😅

[Maybe_Maybe_not]

Update: I just avoided the poll and using letters, less confusion lol

[MotherEarth2020]

Human Earth Here on Wife's Account. Sorry Haven't been here in a while.

But I have been talking to someone on Similar Worlds with the Antigone. I think you two would make great friends

Image Looks Famous

Hello My long time friend

[Nikki1989]

Neither. I don't like to overthink the trivial.

[OlderAndWiser]

Neither one of those scenarios suggests a real abiding interest in me.

[VIVANT]

Agreed.

[OlderAndWiser]

I'd run away from both of them, and you would, too!

[Lynx122]

I'd rather talk to somebody if we never meet up I still get a good conversation out of it and we can be friendly. If I meet up with somebody and they barely talk to me they're on their phone or something I just feel like why are we even doing this? I just wanna go home.

[VIVANT]

Yup I get that

[Zack-Bann]

I have friends who are great when I see them but if I don’t initiate we can be apart for years and they won’t call me first


I hate that


Would much rather someone makes the effort to make plans and during that time we’ll figure it out

[VIVANT]

🫤 hold up. You covered both simultaneously…

OooOh I wrote it incorrectly…I meant

say you see someone daily & they speak enthusiastically but they avoid making plans

Compared with, you see someone daily and they will make plans to see you but are not talkative at all.

Still I don’t like the situation you presented 😤
I hope it’s a minority. You deserve wayyyy better 🥲

On the other hand lots of people are flaky and not solid like you 😉

[WindAtMyBack]

Whoops, I voted before reading all the options. I voted B, which is OK I guess, because I lean that direction.

Option A would indicate to me that they do like spending time with me, but just aren't very talkative, which is fine by me.

Option B just seems like someone gabby, but not much else.

Although in both cases I think it's over generalizing.

[VIVANT]

Yeah I really botched the updates lol 🤦🏻‍♀️

Yeah I think I’d feel the way you do in a general sense but it does depend on the nuance as well 🙂

[Sevenpointfive]

i used to be in a really bad place. i lived for my dog and i had no time for anyone else. so, i had this shitty job but all of the younger crowd really looked up to me. it was very weird. so they'd all ask to hang out outside of work. some of it was sexual.

i couldn't tell them why i couldn't hang out. i was usually busy though taking care of my dog. i didn't mean to throw any of that away, but my baby was more important. i'm sure we could've had fun. i apologize.

[VIVANT]

Interested bio!!

[VIVANT]

Interesting *

Also sweet, what kind of dog?

That’s like me and Bella. 🐶

I always leave parties to be with her.

[Sevenpointfive]

he was a maltese. he was so sweet too. very protective of his family. he got a lot of affection and knew he was loved. i didn't know little dogs could say "i love you", but he did one time. he said it right after i said it to him and he tried so hard. i hate that 15 years was all he had. my pain is every day. rip. i'll be there soon

[GoodGuyBreakingBad]

For example: I meet this Woman, and we go out she has little to talk about but we both decided on the plans to where we were going also she never has time to talk on the phone or text message me, yes this would make me feel unappreciated. Now, maybe I am wrong, but that's how I feel about things. Someone who is so busy and has no time for me would make me feel down. Why should I allow this to make me feel depress because after all I have self-esteem issues?

[VIVANT]

I can understand that well. Your view makes sense.

[nawtee_me]

I said plans with no convo. The reasoning is that if they make plans then they want to spend time with me. Maybe they are a little shy or don’t have the conversational skills…. Board games…. Beat them in a board game and play again and again and the conversation will happen. Maybe just need to crack the shell for them to come out of….

[VIVANT]

Yup I agree I think that’s the way. But I really botched up the poll bc I made it confusing and you voted positively for the negative one 😛 my fault

[ClassicDropout]

I would just appreciate that they spent time with me at all. I know I'm not that important, so if someone takes the time out of their day to talk to me, I'm not going to ask for more.

[VIVANT]

What if they works fine with you but don’t talk

And hey! Everyone is special 🥊

[ClassicDropout]

I'm like that sometimes. I don't really have anything to say but I just want to be around the people I like. I wouldn't immediately feel like the person didn't appreciate me if they weren't talking, but I'd feel pressure to start talking more for sure

[VIVANT]

Yeah she

I wouldn’t necessarily feel unliked but can be stressful

[Aakash_Hangargi]

I believe both options are treating you good and it might be their personality I don't think any of the scenarios presented they are trying to make you feel bad or not intrested.

Sometimes we expect more from a person that they are not yet capable or comfortable to do so
Interact with them both and make them comfortable or put a little effort from your side to push them a little to be both.

If still they are either one of them accept it if you really like them.

By time personalities change slightly so it's the game of time.

[NathanDavis]

both are equally, odd...

but, I do think that I would have to consider much more factors for context... lol

[VIVANT]

I hear you lol

[NathanDavis]

some people can be just a bit more awkward about it... so it can take them some time to get out of their shell... lol

[VIVANT]

Yup very true 😏

[RageBabe]

I voted the same, and you summarised it for me. Thanks. ☺️

[NathanDavis]

@RageBabe most welcome (=

[RageBabe]

@NathanDavis 😊

[Juxtapose]

I'm kind of confused on what the choices are but I would rather they talk to me without making specific plans. It sounds better than the alternate option presented.

[VIVANT]

Yes I know I’m deleting this as soon as gag lets me 🫣 starting over

Next time I have to remember to ask from a positive Anglo I e which would make you feel more appreciated —bc people tend to shed presence and forget in asking which is worse

[Juxtapose]

Sounds good, I will look out for it and see what I think 👍

[TallAnon]

Not talking a lot could just be them being nervous, actions > words for me.

[VIVANT]

Yeah I think so

[Rimaisme]

Why plan something if you have no conversation

And If we're having conversations all time surely we'll have plans

[strateguy632]

4th Both show interest! So neither.