Was she flirting or just being nice?

[Anonymous]

This one is tricky. I already discussed it with friends but I wanted other perspectives because they say the girl was flirting with me but I have my doubts: I was stopped by a female NGO fundraiser who had my same age three days ago. It was an NGO which I already knew because I was already stopped by different people in other occasions. To be honest, in that moment I felt up to make a small contribution and of course she was happy (commissions, objectives and so on, which is natural because it is her job). But after that, she continued with small talk, she told me about her life, her studies, hobbies and even dropped some questions that showed interest for me as well. At some point she even asked for my favourite food, nearby restaurants recommendations and even if I had plans. It started to seem a Tinder conversation about which I had doubts if she was being kind, it was part of her fundraising strategy to show empathy or if she was actually flirting. Finally, she wrote on the information leaflet “This is for a coffee with (her name)”, asked for a selfie and my number to send it to me (was this personal or just how they train them to behave?). Minutes after we said goodbye, she sent me that photo with a text message saying “Hello (my name)! I am (her name), that cute girl from a while ago. You actually made my day by helping me. I owe you a coffee!”. I replied to her that I talked well about her to the NGO headquarters follow up call and that I was also up to a coffee whenever she wanted. She replied “Awww thank you” and the conversation ended there three days ago. Should I text her or all the coffee talk was protocolary fake kindness? Thank you for reading me.

[Anonymous]

You are thinking way too much into it. She took the risk of giving you her number and mentioning the coffee so reach out to follow up and set a date. If she’s not interested or you misunderstood then it is not going to completely destroy your self esteem. You don’t need anymore feedback truly. Just do it.

[summersunshine326]

So bottom line is, she finds you attractive. She wanted your number and took the risk to see if you’re interested in coffee. Meaning in girl language (I’m into you, I want a casual date with you if you’re interested)


If you’re interested in her, REACH OUT and set a date. (She’s going to think you have the same intentions as she does)


DONT REACH OUT (if you aren’t interested. Nobody wants a pitty date.)


Hope this helps!

[Asker]

I followed her on social media and I found out she wasn’t part of the NGO but of a third-party so-called business which gets profit from people adhering to NGOs. I did relaunch a follow up for a coffee but she mentioned an excuse without rescheduling, mentioning she was abroad next week visiting her mother. To what I replied that the week after that I was on a trip on holiday (which is true). I also asked her if she wanted to take a coffee to follow up my donation or to know me more. She then asked me where I was going on holiday without replying to the coffee thing. So, she replies but seems to never set or to avoid the coffee she initially talked about…

[Anonymous]

She was 100% flirting.