How to make a shy girl comfortable with you?

[Anonymous]

I was thinking of getting this girls number and texting her, so we can get to know each other, would this work or do I have to do something else?

[Victoria14]

itll work. im shy in person but not as shy through text/online. So you can get to know her but make sure you still see each other in person because if your contact is solely through text, chances are itll still be very awkward and quiet when you two are actually together. so text her first and if a few conversations go by and go well, then take her out. but you have to ease into breaking through her shell. it may take awhile but if she likes you, itll all turn out great!

[Asker]

I was thinking of handing her my phone next time I see her, so she can enter her name and number and then I'll text her.

[Victoria14]

that should be good! just dont be too pushy haha thatll make her keep her distance if she's uncomfortable with it

[Asker]

Not at all, I made that mistake already when I asked her out, fortunately she has been alright in the aftermath because I backed off slightly, while pretending like nothing happened. But even if nothing happens romantically, I would still like to get to know her better because she seems like a really nice person.

[Victoria14]

aww thats sweet! well im glad nothing too bad happened. i think you'll be fine! and im sure she'll come to like you!

[laceandstuff20]

that works but she'll probably still be shy with you in person.. maybe not as much though -just as long as you show that you're interested in her and aren't bothered by her shyness she'll eventually get comfortable around you :) (I'm really really shy and this is what helps me be more comfortable around a guy - really sweet that you asked about this btw!)

[Asker]

She knows I'm interested and I get the sense that she's slowly starting to get more comfortable around me, it would nice to have a convo with her, she seems so interesting and I want to get know her better. I was listening to a conversation she was having with another guy and she seems so intelligent.

Thanks, I'm just surprised that she is shy around me, I don't bite :D.

[laceandstuff20]

I'm shy around most people until I get to know them but especially around a guy I like so maaybe that could be it :p:)

[Asker]

I rushed a bit and asked her out and she said she was busy, but earlier in the week she started hanging around in my space a lot more and seems to want me to speak to her, so I'm prepared to be patient with her and she what happens next. I think she's worth getting to know.

[laceandstuff20]

that probably got her attention and now she knows you're interested in her which is good :) and it's wonderful that you're willing to do that :) ah so sweet, sounds like you're perfect for her :)

[Asker]

Thank you, that's made my day. :D

[laceandstuff20]

hearing that a guy is willing to work to win over a girl, and seems to really respect her has made my day!!

[laceandstuff20]

hope everything works out :)

[Asker]

Thank you, I hope so too. :)

[lumos]

You can't "make" her comfortable with you. It's like trying to "make" someone like you. You can't. Either they do, or they don't. It's something that takes a lot of time and patience. Keep your word, don't let her down, don't pressure her and give her her space. Doing those things won't guarantee that she'll be comfortable with you, but they might help.

[Asker]

You're right.

[Keyspirits]

Yeah.. social media is da best way to know abd kearn about a shy person. Its too stressful in face to face. U can say its less intimidating and stressful behind da screen and u won't be able to judge her physcially much.

[Asker]

That's what I'm thinking, maybe when she gets to know me better she will be able to relax a bit more.

[Keyspirits]

Yeah i was once a shy person and the only way to get to know meh and open myself up to dat person is get to know meh through medias first. Explain to them ant my probs that i have to make meh feel more at ease and if they're ok with it, than im kool with it as well and the next day, we would be talken in person nonstop. Juz gotta figure out what her prob is and ur good to go.

[Shybliss66]

I am extremely shy and I think texting her would be a great idea. I have problems speaking to people in person but I'm great over texting. It also helps me when the guy I hang out with has a lot to talk about so that I don't feel pressure from a weird awkward silence

[findingdreamland]

Always interact her in her territory. Because she feels more comfortable there. And try to arrange sth with her friends so it will not be that obvious. And then act. Those girls need some time to relax. Don't force her. This will push her away.

[Asker]

I wouldn't want to apply any form of pressure onto her, I'm more than happy to be patient and get to know her better over time.

[findingdreamland]

That is great. Say this to her too. She will be very happy and relax, I can imagine :)

[Asker]

I will tell her, I'll tease her a bit politely informing her that I don't bite and she can speak to me. I think it's cute that someone is so shy around me as it's usually me that's the shy one.

[findingdreamland]

That is cute. That is interesting though. You are in those people s shoes now, who tried to understand you all the time :)

[Asker]

Yes I am and it has been quite the eye opener. :)

[findingdreamland]

Hahaha right right :)

[Ungratefulbones]

she just has an issue with communicating. shyness is a social disorder that can be overcome through meditation. there is really nothing you can do about a shy girl. its like talking to a mouse in a way.

[Asker]

But she seems okay talking to other people, it's just me who seems unable to talk to lol.

[Ungratefulbones]

Then she probably isn't shy. Im sorry but she probably doesn't see u like that