No responses on match. com despite sending out over 150 messages?

[GKIzCrayCray]

I have sent out over 150 messages on match. com and have not received a single response. My messages are will constructed, well written, short, sweet and simple. I have asked my female friends to review that, as well as my profile and profile photo and they all tell me it looks great and that they would respond to me if they received that message. Obviously that hasn't worked. Men, is this normal? Women, what are you looking for?

Updates

+1 y

It's up to 170 now. I finally received one response. Here is the message:

I don't know why you bother messaging women like me. You will never have a chance with a good looking woman, or possibly any woman for that matter. Perhaps you should aim in your own league and message some fat ugly chick instead of wasting my time as well as other girls like me. Guys like you are precisely the reason we can't stand men.

Maybe she's just telling me what ever other woman is afraid to say.

Updates

+1 y

I've decided to give up on the online dating and just enjoy the single life. It's not worth giving up my time and dignity only to get fruitless results in the end. I will focus on becoming a better a musician instead. With all the time I devoted to online dating, I could become a much better guitar player in a short amount of time if I fill it with that. Thanks for the advice and ideas everyone.

[Anonymous]

I did that for a while and most of the guys I met didn't have the trouble guys on GAG describe... We were all fairly average looking and personalitied young professionals of a medium height/weight proportion. That seems to be match's sweet spot. If you have edgier interests, okcupid may be a better bet. More conservative, eharmony. That's all my opinion, of course.

1. Check to see if they've logged on recently. Match makes it difficult to hide your profile even if you aren't checking in.

2. Check their preferred location and age range.

3. Look for similar interests to chat about.

4. Have a guy who is good with girls check your profile & pics. Girls sometimes hofe their true thoughts to be nice.

[GKIzCrayCray]

Actually that makes a lot of sense because I have had much better luck with OKCupid. For every 5 messages I send, I get one response.

In response to your advice, it is good advice and I already follow it. I only message people who are currently online. I always check age range and location before messaging them. I always bring up similar interests to ask questions about. The one male friend I have who is good with women told me I need to lie about my income and prestige. He said that's how he gets a lot of women. I have too much integrity to do that.

[GKIzCrayCray]

Also, what you said about women not wanting to express their true thoughts, I did get an email from one woman finally who expressed her true thoughts. Here it is below

I don't know why you bother messaging women like me. You will never have a chance with a good looking woman, or possibly any woman for that matter. Perhaps you should aim in your own league and message some fat ugly chick instead of wasting my time as well as other girls like me. Guys like you are precisely the reason we can't stand men.

Maybe she's just telling me what ever other woman is afraid to say. If that's the case maybe I just need to stop the online dating.

[Opinion Owner]

I can't imagine saying something like that. What a bitch! That being said, very good looking women on dating sites would make me skeptical, unless they're shy or something. I've even heard of guys pretending to be women on free sites and apparently some spam bots, too. It's a weird, wild world. But the guys on match that I met did seem to have similar experiences (not all great & not horrible) as I did, so I'm not sure why it works for some and not others.

[Opinion Owner]

There are definitely some weirdos online. (And in the real world). Picking up on red flags such as anyone who says "I'm so tired of guys/girls who..." Or say something like "I don't want drama." People with a ton of photos tend to be narcissic - esoecially if they're provacative (cleavage shot for chicks & shirtless mirror shot for dudes). People who talk a lot about what they don't want are usually no go's. People who have drinks in every single picture. Etc.

[GKIzCrayCray]

Absolutely. I avoid those profiles like the plague. I also tend to message women who are somewhat attractive or cute but not super hot. This woman that sent me that message was cute but I wouldn't even say she was pretty. I decided to stop the online dating thing yesterday. I realized with all the time I'm wasting I could be working on my hobbies. And you're right, there certainly are a lot of crazies on there.

[Opinion Owner]

I stopped using it myself, so I can't say I blame you. Best wishes!

[Izzy2102]

I don't know 150 does seem like a lot. Do you have a very specific type?
What picture do you use?

[GKIzCrayCray]

I do not have a very specific type. I am not terribly picky in the looks department, but more picky about the way I am treated. The picture I'm using is the same one I'm using on this site.

[eddzeeman]

Online dating only works out for women. They receive maybe 300 messages within the week all boosting their egos with compliments. Online dating is a waste of time and a joke, unless you've got endless comments and time, which no one has. Plus these girls have low self esteem, and think they are the queens because they receive so many compliments and messages.

[Anonymous]

Women are picky especially in online dating. Generally women receives many messages and in truth it is the picture (s) that plays the crucial role in standing out. Women in dating sites are shallow and they base a lot on the attractiveness of the guy.

[rufurrealz]

all those love sites are rigged. I've tried like 4 and the same thing happened. dont waste ur time or money.

[GKIzCrayCray]

Yeah, I will never pay for an online dating site again. Lesson learned.

[kheserthorpe]

The data I've seen on okcupid suggests a 20% reply rate for men is very much in the typical range.

From that I'd conclude that you're normal and match. com sucks.

[Anonymous]

Yes, it's normal for dating sites. Women are very picky there, because they receive so many messages.

[Mark-777]

all girls who do not reply to my messages on Match. com I block them and don't press like until they reply also - so there not many left to go ha ha

[Koolz123]

Alright well first off what did you write?

[GKIzCrayCray]

Hi (user)! I was browsing through profiles and ran across yours. What are your favorite travel destinations? (she said she likes to travel) Who's your favorite doctor? (She said she likes Doctor Who) Mine is the 10th one, David Tennant. I would love to chat more if you are interested. If not, no worries, and good luck!

Greg

[Koolz123]

Alright man listen here ill break it down in a few steps

1.) Its good that you say hi but introduce yourself at the beginning not at the end (you introduce yourself at the end if after you met someone or reconnected with someone you haven't seen in a while)
2) "I was browsing through profiles and ran across yours" this is a no because its kinda shows your in a sense creepy I don't know what girls told you it was good but its not, find a way to rephrase it but in a friendlier like take a look at her profile and see what her interests are and get common ground (have like a short story behind)
3. its good that you ask questions but stop switching the subject keep talking about HER not you! only switch the subject after you ask her a few questions about the topic
4. " I would love to chat more if you are interested. If not, no worries, and good luck! " dont ever say this because they won't even respond to this LOVE is a strong world say "I would like to get to know you better

[Koolz123]

4-continued) but be funny and find common ground to end the convo and dont say if she's interested or not your trying to get to know not ask her out on a date immeadately
5.) change your profile around to make it more inviting and mysterious (personality>looks)

[GKIzCrayCray]

I will try your suggestions but my thought it, what's the point of having a profile if you dont want anyone reading it? Your suggestions will certainly be less time consuming for me.

[Koolz123]

Weither it's more or less time consuming isn't the matter, it's the impression that you give off to the person is the matter that determines if it will continue or simply be another number... dating especially on online isn't my thing but if I were in your position I would do what I stated above and tweak your message to your liking

[Error_204]

That's amusing.

[GKIzCrayCray]

It wasn't amusing to me when I got it but in time, I'm sure it will be.

[Error_204]

itmaynotbe BUT! Look on the bright side. We're amused so it's like you're an accidental comedian. Funniest when you don't try.

[GKIzCrayCray]

Haha, good point. Kinda like when I do bad karaoke.

[Error_204]

Which we all enjoy.