If young women are so attracted to power why have all the older women in my life seemingly conditioned me to be subservient and subdued did they 4get?

[Anonymous]

I'm not going to explain too much, if you'd like to nitpick at a lack of details feel free but I think you know what I mean. I was raised by women. Women who tempered my natural male tendencies toward aggression, showing off, competition. I've heard winning isn't everything far more times than I've heard that I should go and try to win. These older women always talked about how great a guy I was because they would love a guy just like me. Have they really forgotten? Is it that simple to forget thier entire youth. My dad was an alpha... she broke up with him soon after I was born. He has other kids, he's got charm and is manly. Why would all of these older females Handycam me like this. Why would they lie. What bothers me is that when I think about it, I can remember being a regular boy but I alway heard: Stop speaking so loud, you don't always have to be the center of attention, competing with other guys over random stuff just makes you a dick, no women wants any of these things... but right here right now. I'm just a lame. All my reflexes are just blunted and not nearly aggressive enough. What purpose does this serve... or can women really just not remember? Can women not raise manly men alone?

[one12oh6]

Because they are giving you advice based on the time period in which they GRE up and were dating. Sadly, things have changed and the women that you are attracted to are not women at all, they're girls and girls nowadays want a guy who looks like a model, have lots of cash to spend on them and do nothing but shower them with compliments. Basically, the women you are interested in are not women at all. They're superficial, materialistic, shallow minded, narcissistic attention whores who seek instant gratification, think the world should be handed to them on a silver platter and that the world and everyone's life revolves around them. In short, they watch too much 'reality tv' like Keeping Up With The Kardashian's. True story!

Its a cold and brutal world out there bro but, I wish you the best of luck!!!

[Asker]

There's no way that's all women. I know those women yea but what's funny is that sometimes even those women. Have good traits too. It's a spectrum. Thing is, I just feel like if I had been left to myself or been given a more balanced upbringing I could have found my way to being a n average dude. I guess all the women just seriously curbed my growth arc. I was just so secure though. I was sure I was doing everything right. Even when I didn't get a girlfriend all through highschool it didn't occur to me lol. Oblivious, that I take responsibility for. I got comfortable with the story I was told and didn't do anything when it turned out not to be true

[Jocko]

Manly men like that use up and throw away younger women. Older women want a nice caring guy who won't throw them away. You may be lame now but when you get a little older you'll be in great shape. Young girls want fun and believe in fairy tales, but at about 25-26 they realize they want stability and someone to actually be there for them and everything you are is what they'll want.

[dudeman]

Yeah but why would u want them after they have been ran through. Have some self respect.

[Asker]

See this is what's hard. It's like, and I know this is literally objectify in but it's for the analogy. Say you had a check for a million to buy a car and you saved and saved for that. You take it to the collector who's selling and you're ready to buy but there's another buyer he's got 3 quarter mill but in cash though. For whatever reason yea your millions nice but its a check and itll havr to clear and the sellers not sure they should let you drive off b4 that happens so the cold hard cash in front of them wins out. It's got value, less value but instant gratification is just so much better. The other guy takes the car out, brings it back slightly dented, not much but it also doesn't have that new car smell and the seats conformed to his shape. Yea it's still your dream car but it's no longer all you wanted it to be. You'll still take it... but you're gonna be mad, because when you bought it from the collector after it was returned you still had to pay more. The price is higher 4 u

[Jocko]

You have to stop thinking that women are sweet and innocent and so fresh and new. It doesn't matter. Oh no she slept with some idiot I think Im better than. Sorry to break it to you but thats 99% of women. The majority of people don't get to just pluck some girl in high school have her there whole life and be the only one thats had her.

Because a girl has been with someone else, in a realtionship or in bed with someone else theyre garbage? unworthy of love and a commitment from someone else? Get over yourselves. Its partially that attitude which is why you don't have anyone. If your better than all these guys go out there and prove it to a girl, but chances are any girl over the age of 13 is going to have at least kissed someone else. So your always gonna get a scratched and dented model. Hate to break it to you.

If you can't get past a girl doing something before she even met you, you'll never have a successful relationship, ever.

[Asker]

It's not that I want a virginal girl. I just feel like... if my way of acting is supposed to be so great. It shouldn't take me till age 27 to have a real relationship. SOMEONE should notice right? I don't need or expect to have a ton of women in my lifetime nor did I really expect to Mary my first love. I don't think of women as single use, my point is more of an overall one. Someone should be willing to pair up with me if I'm doing so many things right apparently. I don't expect any one girl man, I do however expect SOMEONE.

I'm not crazy enough to think I deserve a virgin, nor do I put much worth in virginity. I just feel like if women in general aren't attracted to me for such a long period then it means I'm doing something wrong, as far as I know however, I'm following what I was told.

I'm just trying to figure out why I was told this. I don't think it was malicious, but I can't figure out the real reason the rules don't get me where they're supposed to.

[Jocko]

Do you think they are right? or are they right because you only think they are? Maybe you aren't being true to yourself and whats coming across is someone whos fake. You may be a nice person in general but are you acting around girls how you think they want you to act or how you want to act?

[lolalovesvedette]

Its easy to attract a mate. Its hard to keep one.
I think the women that raised you, raised you to not be like your father so you could actually find love and not sprinkle babies around and respect women cause without women you wouldn't even have been born.
Why not get a close relationship with your dad and see if he's actually what you've blown him up to be? I'm sure he's not as charming, or happy, as he seems.

You aren't who you've been raised to be though. You can literally train your mind/body to be how you want to be.

[Asker]

I know my dad. He's got morals and principals and he believes in himself. He's also selfish, not angry but selfish. He's told me before that he doesn't mind breaking promises he made to other people just so long as he never breaks one to himself. He's not a perfect individual but he's the type women choose. My mom got a safe guy to raise me and as soon as I was raised, she dumped him for an aggressive narccicst with a gambling problem. She regrets it but it doesn't change the fact that she was attracted to the charm. My mom's one of the smartest women I know, I think the attraction circumvent logic to a degree but still.

I'll be a great boyfriend to the girl I'll never get, or the girl with the kid who needs stability. I'm sorry but I don't want that. I want the whole thing. My girlfriend who I date marry have a kid with and stay with. I don't want to be the backup hitter.

[Asker]

And that's the thing that's funny. I feel like I could definitely jeep a mate. That's easy... I just can't attract one

[Anonymous]

We can't raise a man to behave or do what seems natural, we raise men to think like women.. Men and women are two different, we think and act different doesn't matter how aggressive a women is or sensitive a guy is, as women you feel like you failed your son :(
Because we can show them how to become a man.

[Asker]

Ah, so I'm basically a female thinking man... and now I have to learn the male side. That's... wow. I really don't like this.

[Opinion Owner]

It's not that you are a female thinking man... Wait, hold up LMAO... 😂😃😃I'm sorry I just pictured a trani... Anyway sorry, I'm just saying there's a lot of ways of a man that women don't quite understand.. Like for one the male body young man in puberty, or Totestorone.. the fuel behind a lot things men do.. I'm not saying it impossible it's just most men who are completely bought up with no make figure, have more complex's insecurities about certain things.. Such as there bodies , Penis.. even developing a relationship with a women.. Again not all of them but most. I have a son and his father is very active in his life, but 90percent of the time he's with me.. Etc.. And I see it

[Asker]

Any advice? Because the thing is as an adult trying to learn to be a man is frowned upon. It would just look like I randomly got more aggressive. No one would condone that... or is that part of it, being slightly okay with stepping outside the lines. Is noone gonna "tell me it's okay" to be a man. Is it just sort of thankless verbally but useful in practice?

[LauraMarx]

Why would all of these older females Handycam me like this.

[Asker]

They just keep filming and they won't stop!

[LauraMarx]

"Get a better camera!" I shout. "I'm not atourist attraction! I'm a human being, god damnit! My life has value!"

[Asker]

Seriously though, any insight. You're my age. Does your mind want one thing and your body want another. I know it's cognitively taxing to tell a guy that hey should get a bit more edge maybe be a bit more of a dick because you wouldn't logically wanna be on the receiving side of that but I'll never try to pick you up lol.

What do you think, these ladies love me. They wouldn't do it on purpose, what gives?

[LauraMarx]

well... Let me put it this way... Just because powerful men sleep with a lot of women, it doesn't follow that women desire powerful men.

Even if they did, there is more to life than your god damn loins, comrade. Try to live your own life!

[Asker]

2 things,
1) how does that not follow.

2) it's only such a focus for me because I've never been good at it. Like, it's really the primary goal of the human body and it's hard being a horny guy who ant get laid all the time. p*rn depresses me at this point. It's actually a really big deal. No matter what else I do in life I'll feel like a failure if I can't get ladies. Not because your on a pedistal or anything but because you're right... it shouldn't be that hard and it is for me. It's like... you could go your whole life without learning to read. Many people do, but here in this culture where almolst everyone can do it... wouldn't you feel a bit inept?

[Asker]

Also all these lovely supportive women are starting to wonder why I've never had a girlfriend even though I'm good looking. They're starting to think I'm gay... via hints... it's really getting hard to convince them otherwise.

[LauraMarx]

1. I'm implying, y'know, powerful men are inherently predatory.

2. I'll be blunt w/ you, okay?

When you talk about wanting a partner you talk about it in terms of social status and material value. It is so transparent. You aren't hurtin' in your heart. You're talking from your entitlement. Sort yourself out!

[Asker]

Well I guess. It's just that, I don't mind working hard you know. No shortcuts. Do it the right way from the start. Follow the rules, they're guidelines. It's just, like... you do that for a reason you know. At least that's what I was told. When I wold remember to hold the door or pull out a chair they would go "great, just like that. You're going to make some girl very happy one day" I guess I kind of thought that that girl would, in turn make me happy too. This is way before I knew and understood sex too. Why would they set me up like that? Why incentivise me like that I'd I wasn't ever supposed to believe it would pay off?

[Asker]

I get that I expect things from women and that's bad but I mean... clearly they expect things from me too or else I'd be fine as is. I'm not delivering, I'm just wondering why I was told that these are the things women would be looking for... by women, if they're not. What was the point in confusing a 5-15 year old like this? Did I miss understand the lessons?

[LauraMarx]

oh man this got Oedipus real fast

so do you think the women who raised you, and the girls who won't fuck you, are in leagues. The girls who won't fuck you aren't making good on your mothers promises?

like you see why that's kind of ridiculous, and... Freudian? That's crazy.

Also what specifically do you expect from women
and I don't see what women are expecting from you. No girl is dating you that doesn't mean anything. That's not some girl having expectations for you. That's having her own, like, autonomous being. You are fine. You're literally fine you're alive and kicking and shit you're doing alright. You just want that + some girl so you dont feel bad about yourself. Like I say, entitlement.

[Asker]

Okay clearly they're not in leagues. That doesn't even make sense. I just... I can't figure out what makes their information so wrong. Like, I could tell a girl how to get a boyfriend. I could get my daughter laid lol. Not that I would necessarily want to do that but I could...

It's just... having been a 20 something women at one point I assume they would know what they wanted at that age. There it's that simple.

Also I was under the impression that everyone wanted to have somebody. Also there are plenty of women saying it's okay to want to have sex and go out and get some. That's usually to other women and such but... like I thought it was okay for me too.

Also they must have standards. Not for me personally, they don't care about me personally they care about themselves like normal rational people but I'm just saying that I overwhelmingly don't match up to different ladies sets of standards and that considering that I thought I was training for this... I'm surprised.

[LauraMarx]

alright so the jist is you expected your mother to train you to fuck girls from a young age

that's... really weird, dude. Like, seriously. Stop blaming your mother for girls not wanting you lmao.

[Asker]

Why do you keep putting words in my mouth? I told you, I was doing this before sex crossed my mind.

I simply thought that what a women said would attract women. Would indeed attract women. Am I blaming her, no not really. I'I'm trying to understand, mainly because it's not just her it's aunts and god mothers and really sucessful smart women. That I have nothing but respect for. I'm wondering why then the advice seems so I'll suited for the real world. Even if it was "thier fault" that wouldn't really help me. I'd still be here where I am. The thing is that I'm trying to understand what women really want, i dont believe its for a guy to go "full asshole" but I also know that the nice fluffy version I was sold on is also not entirely correct.

My guess is that if I can sort out the reason what they say is so different to what I see in real life, I might be able to better act on it.

You can keep laughing but I'm not gonna rage so you can just write me off. I get it if I'm boring u tho

[Asker]

You know all of this was unsolicited advice. Like , they made a point to train me to do this it's not like I enrolled in "get girls camp" they made me kind of think this was just normal and part of life... I never really questioned it. It's just how I was raised. Like... being raised catholic or something and you go ahead doing right because you think it will get you to heaven (this is just for analogy sake... no I don't thing getting in bed with a woman. Is comparable to actual heaven) imagine if you get to be like 30 and everyone says "wait you thought you were gonna get to heaven by being good? It's gonna take a lot more than that buddy" you know I mean it's not like you sought out catholicism at age 5, it was just thrust upon u. Why would you question it?

[dudeman]

Because women know what they want mentally but it doeant make their pussies wet. Never listen to women about women. Listen to a man who slays tail about women.

[Asker]

Why is that. Do you think guys know what they want? I mean I think I do but now I'm wondering... if I got it, would I like it? Maybe the difference between women and men is that they get a chance at that ideal and find out it sucks... where as we usually don't and so continue to romanticize it. Maybe if I got a girl who was super into me... I wouldn't actually be super into her.

[dudeman]

Possibly

[Anonymous]

In order to be a man you need a father who teaches you to drink beer, and fuck women, you need that prick side in order to get women our age cuz their all about the bad boys.

[Asker]

Meh I'm 22. Too late to go through a daddy crap course. Should I just stay the course? I feel like if I start learning now I'll be a dick right around the time everyone starts acting nice. I guess being ahead of the curve isn't always a good thing

[Opinion Owner]

Nah someday women realize... When that day comes you'll have all the game. Stay true.

[R4zor]

Because they are stupid cunts ignore em fight hard