She's Interested In Me But Not "Curious" About Me?

[Anonymous]

I have been dating a girl for about 3 months and it's great, best I have ever had. It's long distance right now so that's hard for me and we text100x a day (literally) but in all this great talking, loving, friendship and fun she never asks me anything about my interests or past.

In the early days we talked about "this vs that" things all the time but it was largely me saying "Swings or Slide" and she would occasionally ask my opnion. At this point I know her favorite color, food, movie, TV show, painting ect. she has never asked about any of mine. We talk history but she asks laser focused questions and that is it for her interest.

My question is it is obvious she loves me (actions,words,acts) and I think the world of her but she is the first who has never gushed about me, been interested in my tastes or even curious about my industry (most of the time that's all girls want to talk about). Why? Why would you take the point of view that things like that will just make themselves known and never ask? It's one thing that is really confusing me about the greater and larger relationship?

[MissGuided]

It could be a couple of things. 1) She's just not that into you. 2) She thinks playing mind games will make you more interested in her. 3) She's scared she'll open Pandora's box. 4) She doesn't want you to think she's overbearing with all her questioning.

Honestly, it all depends on her past relationship experiences and her personality. You might want to check into those to see if it's even worth pursuing this relationship. Regardless, I would initially give her the benefit of the doubt. I know you're a man so you probably don't do the feelings thing well, but maybe bringing it to the table will make things easier. It says you're 30-35 which means you're an adult. That means it's time to have adult conversations. It may be blunt, but you'll get an idea of where she stands.

[Asker]

I asked her a while back and her response was she likes to have it come out naturally. My thought at the time was well if I don't just start dropping it into conversation like a child it's never going to really find its way into general conversation. Honestly we talk about everything and I do mean everything. It's extremely close, we say I love you freely, I have meet her whole family. Just never had someone not be crazy curious about me during a relationship? its small but different.

[MissGuided]

Oh OK then it's just a minor issue. Hey, at least this way she'll always intrigue you. =)

[Asker]

Yea it's minor but really starting to take up mindshare. I was currious in girl logic why someone would take that pov? It feels like a protection mechanism but not 100%.

[MissGuided]

Well from what you have told me, it's probably not a protection mechanism if in fact you two truly talk about everything. It may just be personality. Some people care not to question. Like they'd much rather not ask unless it's actively interfering with their lives.

[CrazyLove00]

I agree - it could just be her personality. I knew a guy like this once. I would have to throw in my thoughts in a conversation from time to time or just share without him really asking about it. Then he would realize it and ask questions. It took a while but that's what communication and dating is all about. :) good luck

[hippychick21]

don't worry. she may just need a solid foundation of trust, knowing that you really do like her and aren't going to just get her to spill everything then leave. she is maintaining good emotional boundaries, and guarding her heart. be patient with her, and focus on pursuing her- that is YOUR role. no matter how "sophisticated" we get, men are designed to pursue women. you are still very "young" in your relationship- take your time.

[azzhole725]

Women love to talk about themselves; in reality, they don't really care about guy's opinions, except if they look hot or not. Your "girl friend" is self-centered. Your past and interests don't matter to her until they conflict with her interests. That's when she will talk about you.

[CrazyLove00]

Not all girls but yes if she is not asking about you, she doesn't really care to get to know you.