How do I stop being nervous around women?

Question

It’s irritating.
When certain women talk to me, I forget English, it’s embarrassing.

Today at work someone asked me a simple question.
She asked if anyone was using the plastic Bin next to me.

First I said “I don’t know”.
I realized that was rude & unhelpful, then I said “Not sure, I don’t think so”

but I stuttered & She had to finish my sentence for me..
This happened twice today..

It happened with my Supervisor too.
I don’t remember our conversation, but I remember stuttering like I was freezing cold.

how do I stop that?

AmandaYVR · Accepted Answer

Wow your social anxiety is really bad if you can't even answer this basic informational type question.

You are overthinking it all. But it doesn't help you much to remind you of that.
First off, you need to stop thinking of women like they are another species. Apes are 99.7% the same genetically as humans. Imagine that. Therefore, females are even closer. Is it because you desire them? Maybe you need to see them as just occupying the same space as you, not in opposition to you. Women are actually quite nice (many of them.) They're more sympathetic than men. They're just suspicious. So as long as you treat them like a regular human being, they won't bite (unless you ask them to in bed!)

I think the only thing you can do is practice and just keep interacting. You need to desensitize yourself to anxiety incrementally. It's called 'exposure therapy.' Start small, baby steps. "Hi", then "Hello", then "Have a nice day" then "How are you today?" Like, that small.

jeemm · Accepted Answer

Nervousness happens when you have expectations, multiple thoughts and/or bad experiences with something that you're forced to deal with. The best way to stop being nervous around something is to not care about the thing you have to deal with. If you have problems being around women then I imagine it's due to your inexperience with them.

That then translates into your thinking up of ways of acting appealingly or in ways that would make you look confident around them. If you don't care about their opinions and simply think of them as people instead of the opposite sex it should help a lot.

I know it's easy for me to just say "don't care" when it might be really hard for some people. For that I apologize.

N192K001 · Accepted Answer

Stop giving a d—. If you're attaching positive-emotions with certain more-favored outcomes, of course, you're going to be nervous if things start moving in any way.  Stop caring about that altogether!  Just be! What will happen will happen. What won't won't , and  it's best to know if it will/won't as early as possible  than later when the stakes are higher.  Fate is fate. Accept it. Deal with it. Also,  stop putting women on pedestals . They also humans  (who defecate, urinate, have things in their past they wouldn't want made public, suffer insecurities, struggle with their own weaknesses/cons/liabilities/flaws, etc.),  like you, me, and the rest of mankind.

Don-__-Don · Accepted Answer

Your first step is recognizing that women are human beings just like you, there's no need to be afraid unless there's an obvious reason for you to be.

And then follow the tips on what other people here give.

Exposure is one of the best ways to get over your anxiety, just don't expect it to be easy.

CubsterShura · Answer

I'm nervous around men too. I can be flirty and witty to an extent but still not that much and I absolutely can't dare to do anything more than that. Maybe start small? No need to make a full blown proposal right away, maybe get comfortable with socializing normally first.

jennifer_bloom · Answer

Over time you will get used to it but you can remind yourself that good looking people are just ordinary people - they burp - they poop - they fart - they smell when they throw up - they get saggy boobs when they are old - and they have anger issues just like everybody else

Givemore · Answer

You are expecting the worst to happen and expecting failure. When you look at girl to say something the first thing you should do is say hey or hi with a smile, you should get a smile back. and you will feel more comfortable. just because she's got breasts and a vagina dosent mean she is going to burn you alive.
Keep your chin up and look just under their right eye, this way you still are showing respect but you won't panic as much.

Tomsta · Answer

Does this happen with female family members to?

Try to find someone your comfortable with and start talking about something your interested in. doesn't need to be shakesphere sonnets you just need to learn that women are nothing to be scared of (usually)

Part of me wants to say you might have selective mutism but im not a phsycologist so

aperson12 · Answer

I think the best thing you can do is try consuming a bit more media with strong female characters to get used to seeing them frequently, then try to find a woman that you don't find intimidating to form a friendship with. By practicing your communications with the non-intimidating woman, you will eventually be able to translate that over? I think the most important thing to remember is that we are people too, just like you. Good luck!

The1andonlE · Answer

Like they say it takes practice to get good at something. You'll have ups you'll have downs, but once you get good at it, you'll be a natural. Start small with your family women, then your friends, and so forth. I get nervous around them too, so your not the only one.

Newhead · Answer

I get nervous around people I like too, don't worry about it too much, just embrace it by keeping a balance. Be cool with knowing that this is the reality, but conscious enough not to be weird and make then uncomfortable on purpose.

BallyT · Answer

Realize that women are just like you not matter how beautiful they are. Women are not aliens ready to kill you.

taeh_ie2 · Answer

I really don’t know what advice to give then this... COME ON MAN YOU GOT THIS, NEXT TIME YOU GONNA TALK YOUR HEART OUT. hope that worked.😊

mindNsoul · Answer

by not over thinking it once it happens or laughing at yourself when it does happen. With time it'll be okay.

iFarted · Answer

It's like any fear that anyone has, the only way to get over it is to face it.
Keep on trying to talk to girls, overtime it'll become easier and to the point that you'll be able to talk to them like you talk to any other person.

Unit1 · Answer

Ask yourself what's the worst, that can happen? It's not like women bite. Or did they bite you before? Their vaginas do not have sharp teeth or sharp claws. But that's just me and I love women.

Liam_Hayden · Answer

Is it all women or only ones whom you find attractive? Anyway, maybe get some counseling.

Anonymous · Answer

Exposure therapy my man! You need to get in a LOT more reps. Make it a POINT to speak with 5 women you DON'T know EVERY day. Do that for a year and you'll be a pro by July and a lothario by November!

Kuressento · Answer

I assumeing your view on most women are of that of goddesses and what not. Women are just the other part of the species, just as men. Yin-yang. See women as people and not beings above you.

Hispanic-Cool-Guy · Answer

Be around them a lot. Once you are around women or anything for that matter, the mind adjusts and gets used to it.

OddBeMe · Answer

Just like anything else: practice. How? Befriend chicks. You’ll learn to talk to them and they’ll love setting you up with their friends.

missy52 · Answer

You know it's bad when even their responses online are directed to men.

codyccc · Answer

Its a human female not a bear the worst that will happen is she will tell you to go away

HedwigInABox · Answer

you have to get used to interacting with women

Dinosaursandanime65 · Answer

Are you ever calm? It’s simple really, *coughs*.

Anonymous · Answer

I don’t know man talk to therapist maybe.

Anonymous · Answer

Interact more and more with them.

Jessie91331 · Answer

grow some balls

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