She's disgusted with the act of anal sex?

[Xcessi]

I'm obsessed with anal sex. And my partner knows this. We've been together for a good decade Yet she would never allow me near her anus... Over the year's she always said she'd try it but this never happened. I remember asking her when we first met if she was into anal and her reply was "yes". Which got me very excited.
Just recently @ Christmas, I spoke to her about it. she said, she was no longer willing to try it because she is disgusted with the act in itself and even if there was no pain and it was enjoyable for her she still wouldn't try it. It's nothing to do with the size of my penis because I'm just your average 7 incher

She's my first sexual partner and I'm now 43. I feel that I'll never get to experience this sexual fantasy of mine unless I cheat on her.

Should I just respect what she's saying and move on. I find it hard to accept because if she wanted to ram a cucumber in my ass I'd let her... pain or no pain. She just won't do it regardless if there is pain or not.

If she said look I don't want to do it because it'll probably hurt or feel like I'm needing a poop or even because of me getting poop on my dingaling. Fine. But hearing her say that she wouldn't even it was enjoyable doesn't make sense.

[Anonymous]

Personally I think a healthy sex life (and relationship) requires compromise, and I think it's sad she is not willing to at least try it to you. Do you make compromises in other areas of your relationship to satisfy her? Perhaps you should try to drive home the fact that she is not the only one who can refrain from doing things the other wants just because you don't like the idea of it. I don't know why it is that some women view sex as different from other things in that respect. But at the end of the day, you cannot force her to do anything she isn't willing to do.

That said, I had an ex who was adamantly against doing anal, but she enjoyed a finger ins her ass while I was giving her oral. That evolved to her using a small vibrator in her ass when she masturbated, which she discovered gave her very intense orgasms. Once she discovered the association between anal stimulation and better orgasms she eventually opened up to the idea of anal intercourse, which became a regular part of our sex life before we split up. She became such a fan that I have no doubt she still does anal sex with her husband.

Perhaps a point of compromise with your wife might be her allowing you to put a finger in her bum while giving her oral. Give that a few months to associate the feelings of anal stimulation with sexual pleasure in her brain before determining whether it will have the desired effect.

Best of luck to you, from one anal aficionado to another. Personally, for me a woman who is not enthusiastically willing to have anal sex is a deal breaker.

[Xcessi]

Thank you for your response. What gets me is I'll do anything for her. Ipon asking her if she had any specific fantasy. She mentioned a threesome. I wasn't keen on sharing her with someone else. And I believed that that could be the end of our relationship. I just wasn't keen upon banging balls with another man but of that's what she really wanted I'd have went through with it. I mean, I'll do anything for her. And I mean anything. But she won't do anything for me.

[Hypnos0929]

Wait so you're obsessed with anal even though you haven't tried it? That means you probably have a porn obsession because that's insane.
Either respect her wishes, offer to let her peg you first (so you can see how a dong in the arse feels), or leave her

[Xcessi]

Nothings insane... A porn obsession. I don't think so.. I experienced a dong in my ass... before I tried to encourage her to try it. The cucumber was approximately 10 inches long with a 7.5 inch girth. I managed 8 inches. And it was a complete an utter peice of pi$$. The hardest part was the first 15 mins afterwards my anus had gaped open. I could have fit my fist in there if I wanted to without experiencing any pain or discomfort. The thing is she isn't afraid of the pain or discomfort it's the act itself that disgusts her

[Shuttlebus78]

Women don’t get pleasure out of anal like men. No prostate.
Also considering you want to damage her body by fitting a fist in there tells me you’re a creep.

[Xcessi]

@Shuttlebus78 thank you for your comment 🙏

[Xcessi]

@Shuttlebus78 actually thinking about. I hate to correct you. But women do enjoy anal. Check this out. And please I'm not here to be negative or to get involved in petty arguments with you. You have your opinion and I have mine. You call me a creep fair play. Let's leave it at that.

“The anus is [packed] with nerves, especially the incredibly erogenous pudendal nerve—which connects to the clitoris," The pudendal nerve carries sensation to and from your perineum, reaching your vagina, vulva, and anus, too.

[SilverFoxGen]

@Shuttlebus78 that's not entirely true. I've personally have had the pleasure of having ANAL sex with over 50+ women most of whom were first timers. I don't know if it's just me or what however I have known that I was able to turn most of the first timers out and now really enjoy having ANAL sex on a regular. I usually have the girls do the driving when I'm in their ASS so that they have complete control of the depth and speed of how they prefer it. I'm just glad that more women are into ANAL SEX nowadays than before and they are willing to try it.

[Whitemeatchicken]

As she should be disgusted. Women overwhelmingly have anal at the request of their partner. I know I hate it. I know tmi about my friends and they all hate it too. I know how guys talk and you’d think every woman loved it. Girls keep it real with other girls though. I think she needs to leave because you bugging her about it all the time isn’t doing one bit of good for either of you.

[Anonymous]

It’s not really like you have a choice. If she disagrees you can’t actually change her mind. So you either forget about or break up because it’s a dealbreaker. If it’s not a dealbreaker, I suggest to respect her choice

[Xcessi]

Time to cheat on her don't you think 🤔

[Opinion Owner]

Real men don’t cheat. If you aren’t happy you can walk away. Cheating isn’t an option

[Xcessi]

I'd honestly say, I'm more real than most men. Especially when I've only had one sexual partner in my entire life. I'm now 43 and I can guarantee you that no other man here has only had one sexual partner in their life. Most men or even ladies nowadays aren't faithful whereas I have been for a steady 15 year's.

[Opinion Owner]

Then why would you even suggest cheating. That’s messed up

[Xcessi]

Let's face it... Men and women both cheat. Fact!

[Opinion Owner]

I said real men and women. Cheaters aren’t real men / women.

[Whitemeatchicken]

Cheating is never the way. Also cheating destroys a lot of families. That’s not good.

[Anonymous]

It is an emotional, not logical, problem for her. Despite what she says, she may be afraid of getting hurt or she may actually be afraid that she might enjoy it and want to do it more often and end up looking foolish for having refused for so long. She may have had some relatively minor trauma when being toilet trained, or simply a puritanical up bringing that told her she is "nasty" back there.

Have you ever tried anilingus with her or is that off limits, too?

[Whitemeatchicken]

I know I don’t like anal. Tried it several times. So it’s completely possible to hate it.

[codyccc]

Just think of it like owning a Ferrari choices you made long ago will prevent you from owning one and there is nothing you can do about it now

[NerviolettiRikki]

You said you’ll never get to experience it unless you cheat on her so how could you be obsessed with it. She obviously wants you to cheat on her. Or knows you do to begin with.

[Xcessi]

Can't we be obsessed with something that we've never tried before. Surely the answer is yes.

[NerviolettiRikki]

Do you find other girls asses attractive?

[Xcessi]

No I don't 🙄

[Anonymous]

You have a choice. Stay with her or break up with her. When a woman says no it means NO and you can't force her decision. The right girl will let you do anything. You want a open minded, adventurous and kinky girl if that's your cup of tea.

[Shuttlebus78]

Just because she doesn’t like anal doesn’t mean she’s not kinky. Maybe she’d let him play with it a little just doesn’t like penetration.

[Xcessi]

@Shuttlebus78 you really do contradict yourself pal

[Whitemeatchicken]

I think some girls will let guys do stuff externally to their backsides but not actual fucking.

[Opinion Owner]

@Whitemeatchicken I fucked a few girls in the ass. They were fine with it. One of them asked me to put it in without asking if they liked anal or not. Some girls like it but some girls don't. I stop asking if they like it our not. If she says put it in my ass then by all means put it in her ass!

[Opinion Owner]

In their ass*

[Whitemeatchicken]

If I were a guy I wouldn’t ask someone to do something in like that either. That’s the choice of the individual. My best friend asked her boyfriend if they could try pegging he left her. I have another friend- female whose boyfriend asked her receive anal and she left him over it. Sex is a tricky thing and can really screw things up.

[Opinion Owner]

That's why I don't ask either. I let her decide if she wants me to put it in or not. If she's up for it then I don't mind but I don't do anal too much. I do have anal lube just in case I come across someone who's anal freak. Find someone a women who likes anal is very rare. The last girl I fucked she's was opened about it but she'll only do with someone who she highly trust because anal sex requires trusts.

[Whitemeatchicken]

I see all kinds of men say all women love it. However, I can assure you, your idea is correct. Most women don’t like it. I don’t think I could be like some guys- do it even though I know my partner hates it.

[Opinion Owner]

Not all women loves anal. There's women who do anal but they don't like it but they'll do it to keep their man / partner happy. When I ask a girl about her sexual preferences I usually asks her whats her likes and dislikes on her sexual preferences. It's Easier way on asking her without offending her or with mentioning the word anal. Quite simply I asked her what she likes in bed and outside of bed then she tells me then that's it.

[Whitemeatchicken]

See I wouldn’t want my boyfriend to do anything in bed he didn’t like just to please me. I don’t think that’s right at all. I guess that’s why sexual compatibility and similar interests are important. Mutual respect is a must too.

[Whitemeatchicken]

Yes I was agreeing most women hate anal.

[Opinion Owner]

Exactly. See Most women I come across will do anything except anal and cum in their mouth or throat that's highly most common with most women out there.

[Whitemeatchicken]

I’m like my fiancé’s cum. Really outside of anal. I’m quite the freak. In the beginning though my fiancé had a talk about likes and dislikes. He never asked me obviously. However, I brought up that I don’t like it. He said his interest in anal 1-10 scale 10 being highest was a 2. I don’t mind if he spanks me, pinches or licks my butt. Just no penetration. Feels like rape.

[Opinion Owner]

When I do anal. I start with the fingers and lots of lube then I put it in very slowly, gentle and only keep the head then penetrate slowly. It is tight but it depends on the girl previous anal sex history with someone. myself I prefer the pussy and most definitely like doggystyle.

[Whitemeatchicken]

Yeah I’ve tried it and I absolutely hate anal sex. I think I’m a kind and decent enough person to where my limits should be respects. I do the same for my partner.

[Opinion Owner]

You should be lucky to have a partner because most good men don't have or can't find good partners. finding a good partner is very hard nowadays. Some people are lucky on finding partners but others not so lucky. Trust me I've been looking for over 20 years on a women but still no luck.

[Whitemeatchicken]

I should be lucky? I’m sorry maybe I misunderstood. I think it’s the least I can ask that my limits are accepted considering I’m very thoughtful and considerate of people in general. Especially the ones I love. It’s a sign of disrespect and neglect otherwise. I’m sorry. I’ve had some neglectful people, not sexually that were that way and I don’t put up with it anymore. I had to banish them from my life. Unfortunately, some were family members. I don’t want pity. I’m just explaining why I think kindness and consideration are so important.

[art84]

You can't force her to do anal if she's not into it and refuses. You should just respect her wishes and just move on from thinking about it.

[Xcessi]

I wouldn't force her into anything. I'm sure I didn't mention forceful anal in my op.

[jahaims]

Sounds like a real cunt. I agree if it were a pain thing but she sounds like she is just being selfish.

[Twalli]

I 7rge every girl to try it at least once. I got lucky because my girlfriend enjoys it, bit you can't force a girl attempt it.

[Whitemeatchicken]

There’s no reason every woman needs to try getting something shoved up her backside.

[Twalli]

@Whitemeatchicken it feels good for some. How do you know if it will for you if you never try it. Some people never ed enjoy sex. If you had it and enjoyed it, you had to accept the post that you may not.

[Whitemeatchicken]

I have tried it. I hate it like most women.

[Whitemeatchicken]

You also should t encourage women to try things that even you know the overwhelming majority hates. I think the last thing men should want to do is put women in situations they don’t like. In have a friend female who was asked by her boyfriend to try anal and she dumped him. I know a guy who was asked if he’d try pegging and he dumped her over it. Never ever tell other people what they should do with their bodies. Most serial killers would recommend killing at least one person, that doesn’t make it valid.

[Twalli]

@Whitemeatchicken Anal isn't illegal, murder is.

[Whitemeatchicken]

In some places yeah it is. I still stand by what I’ve said. Don’t recommend something that you know most people will hate. Despite the topic, that shows you’re tasteless and tactless. Sexuality is very tricky. Just suggesting what you are suggesting will break relationships up. Again tactless.

[Whitemeatchicken]

Some women find are morally against it too. So you’re saying you’d recommend them try it anyways? You’re tactless and tasteless, not to mention thoughtless. Do not recommend anyone try something to their body that is painful to the vast majority. It’s careless and very uncaring.

[Twalli]

@Whitemeatchicken If and when something is illegal I advise against it. Although a lot of people have done so, I so not urge anyone to try illegal drugs. While anal may be painful or unpleasant to most women it isn't painful to all and I don't think anyone can say with 100% certainty that they will dislike anal if they've never tried it. Also some women like their ass bring slapped during sex. I know that that isn't painless and they still want it to happen. So clearly pain is not enough of a deterrent of a sexual act. I am well aware that not everyone like anal, but I don't think you can form an informed opinion regarding it without experiencing it. I cannot say if I will like pegging or not until I have experienced it. I have an idea of how it will feel, but until I expierence it, I can't know for sure.

[Elliot0_07]

You owns you some respect. She pretended to like anal sex t the begging so you would stay around. You need to force her into anal, she owns that to you.

[Shuttlebus78]

You knew from the beginning she didn’t like it. Coercing her or forcing her is not the way to go.

[Xcessi]

You really are a starting to nip my head. Is there a block button. You don't seem to read the question properly. Yet you totally jump the gun. I'm not going to refresh your memory for a 2nd time pal.

[Anonymous]

just respect what she's saying and move on.