How can I stop being shy?

Question

How can I stop being shy?

lucas262 · Accepted Answer

Learn the art of not giving a fuck.

Really. No one cares about you. I don't no one
Your momma don't. Your daddy don't. You boyfriend don't.
Tour Friends don't. Nobody.

Nobody can care for you the way you have to care for yourself. Did you eat today? Did you shower you taking care of yourself? You happy? You feel lonely? You go gym?

You. You are responsible for your attention and validation your self love. If and I mean if you take those 3 things and make other people responsible for then they will let you down. And what your left with is broken sense of your own worth.

You a girl but I told my bois walk like you ballz weigh 10 lbs and people need to get outta your way when you walk in a room.
Pretend you got 2 British guys yelling make way for the kings nuts.

That you got a nice e man, a million dollars and drive a BMW.

It may not be true yet and dosnt have to be you lie to yourself tell yourself your this or that whatever it takes grow that beautiful ego.

Realize most people don't care and are completely self absorbed.

I used to hate myself I had bad social anxiety. Realizing I cared way more than other people abiut my shit helped me, I learned to be more confident by bullshiting myself into loving myself. But 1st I had to realize I had as much a right to live happily as anyone else and that was a tough one for me. Being worthy of love.

So shy? Learn to say fuck em if they don't like you. You like yourself either way. And in your world your the ceo the president you have a mountain with your face on it. Cheera

coachTanthony · Accepted Answer

-------------People who are shy are usually worried about how people perceive them. Stop caring how others see you or think about you and just own who you are. Some will like you some won't but just know you can't always be someone's cup of tea.

"Just be authentically you."
~Coach T Anthony @thedatecoach IG

Pasiton5 · Answer

Wow that's one you can get many different techniques and methods on but it will depend on you when you are really ready to be seen heard, I know how you feel, as a kid I was so damn shy would be in a room and no one would know it, see one of my class mates while out with a brother sister and the class mates is saying hi I would not even turn to acknowledge them just wish they vanish which is silly, I would see other kids just loud yukking it up without any hint of shyness or care and I'm thinking why the hell can't I be like his stupid ass then I remembered he is stupid nevermind, but as I got older, last year i just broke out of it and didn't care what anyone thought of me and I wasn't drunk either, that's how I used to break out of it temporarily, til I was sober now I just don't care I'm seen and heard and every says ok we see you we hear you so what, so what , there's no reason to be shy especially when you find out no one gives a care so open up yourself freely don't hide in back hoping you never get called on, or afraid to voice your opinion or express yourself, you know a closed mouth don't get fed,

molonski2 · Answer

If thats your picture you are stunning if not doesn't matter.
Now many will not believe this but I was once painfully shy , at about your age maybe little younger 14 / 15 / 16 , what initially really helped me was a part time job where I was forced to deal with people , people started talking to me I talked back , I started sport ( Golf ) mainly people older , they talked I talked ( this helped a lot ) , then the big one , I had to start public speaking ( you have NO IDEA , I was literally terrifed , true.. Sht frightened , couldnt talk ) then slowly , and with a little coaching eventually I could do it , and I was okey , no problem. Later at work I had to do presentations , people would say " But , you can do it easily " and I thought , you guys have no idea do you? I became the go to guy , the guy with the frank answer ! Theyd ask me , when no one was talking..
Id encourage you to do parts or all of the above , piece by piece , your confident will grow , dont be " over prepared " for this will allow you to learn the skill of improvisation.

If I could go back to your age , quite seriously this would be one of the major things I would have addressed ( with me ) because of the opportunity in life and business it creates. Really wish you well , if you need anything further , please message me..

GOOD LUCK :)

NathanDavis · Answer

lie to yourself...

At least that's what I did at age 15 going 16... I switched schools, nobody know me, I knew nobody so, I was determined to pretend that I wasn't shy, that I could just join any circle of classmates and just talk to anyone, or everyone.

I actually didn't talk to anyone at first, lol. But I put myself there, within the circles, and when they would speak to me, I forced myself to answer and engage as if I had never ever been painfully shy before. It worked for me, eventually.

Being shy can be different for others though, I suspect that you might not have it that easy to engage in conversations with people, but I am just assuming... I didn't have a problem with that once I had to, my problem was actually to approach and be near people, even to be seen, noticed, in some cases.

But basically, force yourself and put yourself in the situations you're trying to avoid, really do this and get exposed to whatever terrible feeling and emotions this causes you, and just endure it, survive that a few times, and your body and mind will get used to it... it's like, realizing that it might be bad at first but is not lethal, is not deadly, it's not actually as bad as it feels at first, it does start to get better and you get used to it, and then, eventually, you will be in a much better position to handle yourself in these situations.

Makeushiver · Answer

I think the best thing you can do is to determine a role that has all the characteristics you think you want to have; for arguments sake and because it turns me on; let's say you wanted to be a brazenly sexual woman with a touch of sluttiness.
Watch movies that feature that type of woman, Kathleen Turner was an irresistibly dangerous woman whon reeked sensuality. Michelle Pfeiffer & her gorgeous cheekbones slithering across a baby grand piano while it was being played by one of the Baldwins. You aren't looking for anything beyond the attitude, body language, and expressions of a woman well aware of the desire their behavior engenders. Get the appropriate clothes and don't talk yourself out of revealing clothing. My idea of a sex goddess is a woman at a cocktail party wearing a black mini, especially. W/o panties, you can do it, it's an acting role. Wear a pair of Loubutins- the red soles make me cream- or Jimmy Choo either or similar with fuck me heels and a clingy, translucent blouse. No it depends on how extroverted we're talking about. Wearing clothes like that with a lounge European attitude will make you very popular with men, not so much w/women. Perhaps my answer missed the mark, you wanted to be extroverted and I described how to make every man in the room desire you. The thing - a platonic answer despite my attachment to 1st idea- listen when people You'd like to know are talking, both men and women you want in your social circle and only those you want. If he has sycophants forget him. I can't finish this running out of space, will try dm

MarkRet · Answer

Keep in mind that there are some assholes out there that can hurt you, but MOST people are friendly and positive. The high school years are the worst, because teenagers are still trying to figure their own shit out, have no filter, and are unaware of how cruel they can be.

Get involved in activities that expand your horizons and give you a feeling of accomplishment and self-confidence. For me, I took up ice skating lessons. At first, I could barely stand up, but over time, I got to where I could do spins and small jumps. I wasn’t trying to make friends, but I was talking to other people in my class, and my confidence in myself was growing. It all became easier. Sometimes, I’d be working on some skating move, and some stranger would actually approach me, asking how I did that move. Conversation takes off from there.

MotorcycleMan · Answer

Exposure. This isn't necessarily a bad trait, but depending on the level it can impact your life in other ways. If this is something you want to overcome, start slow and take small steps. Be around more people. Find excuses to go talk to people. Ask directions from someone you are attracted to. Better yet, ask for a recommendation for a good lunch place. Your shyness maybe just be from not being used to being around people. Just start pushing yourself into situations that may make you uncomfortable. It's not easy, but the rewards are worth it and can be life changing.

natured · Answer

I don't think there are written rules to follow.
Usually being socially active will help a lot, I used to by shy too, then i started working as a bar tender and everything changed from there.
Yes, it's really difficult in the beginning, but after a while you will even forget that you once was shy.

AlexanderAnttila · Answer

Even as CoachTanthony's presentation is annoying he is correct about the source of your shyness. Look, people are going to think whatever they want to think about you regardless of what you do, so why care. Be who you are, especially who you are in Christ, and don't apologize for it, you're not called to the slavery of shyness, but the freedom of Christ.

K-I-S-S · Answer

Just don't be shy anymore. Jk

Don't worry about it, you will alwayd be a bit, it's part of your personality. Work on yourself, your goals and your body, it will make you feel great about yourself and make you more confident in life.

Aakash_Hangargi · Answer

Just speak your mind everytime untill it stops bothering you then by the time you realise you will be an extrovert.

Don't stop yourself from doing anything careless about what goes wrong and care more about keeping you point and expressing how you feel and one day you will be amazed at your own growth

Gravit1 · Answer

You have fears and familial struggles those two can make interactions more difficult. If you grow in your trust for God you will fear less. God has given us to ability to conquer fear through Christ and the Holy Spirit. I have fears but God wants to rid me of them. You have to take your fears to God and address them, that will help you be freed. I seek the source of my fears and target that in prayer and faith.

tallcuck · Answer

Get your little titties out in the sun. Watch how it makes boys and man happy. That always helps. Next step show them everything. Overcoming anything works this way. Affraid of heights? Go on a suspense bridge with glass floor. Affraid of spiders? Go play with one... Simple. Cauae you will feel shy like never before when you go nude, but you will realise you got nothing to be shy about, once you get some appreciation for your moves. Be carefull not to do it with mean friends, that could get you traumatised...

mrdumbass · Answer

It's really all to do with your mind and how you think about shit

I had 0 confidence that was mentally crippling all my life until 23... Only just a couple days ago I had an apithany and some kind of revelation, some how I magically have confidence now... Not much but a little... You jus gotta stop giving a fuck what people think and not care... It's hard to explain how to so that though... I suggest going to therapy and explain why you are like you are and explain everything clearly how you think about stuff

jshm2 · Answer

It's the same with liking chilli. You just got to start with smaller doses and work your way up.

Talk to your family often, and your friends, and then teachers and associates, etc etc. You'll work your way up and it will help with your social skills as well.

Anonymous · Answer

You can focus more on how you perceive others than how others perceive you, concentrate on active listening and being curious about what the other person has to say instead of thinking how they judge you and remember that they are as self conscious as you are and also might be in their head too much (although its not a rule of a thumb, its highly likely especially if the other person also appears shy)

Dazed0N0Confused · Answer

First & foremost, Love that dress!  Secondly, slowly emerse yourself into social life & talking to more people. It won't happen over night, but this will help build confidence!

TommyMountainFigure · Answer

You can't without lots of practice. By practice I mean putting yourself in positions you would normally be shy in. As you become more familiar with the situation, you'll find the shyness dissipates.

kidvid80 · Answer

when you go somewhere like a store to shop- literally say hello to workers get into a routine of it i was painfully shy and this actually helped a lot

kellytheman · Answer

Trying being confident by talking to people and practice having conversations with people. Also a lot of shy people tend to be homebody so when you have free time try to go out maybe get dresses up and go to club. Bottom line just try be more outgoing but take baby steps till you get comfortable.

Tiptoetamm · Answer

Get out of your shell, open up a bit, I was shy in middle school until I just didn't care what people thought of me. At that point I became less shy

Overmind · Answer

Why would you want to? That's such an attractive trait in a woman in my opinion:) But if it's really something you're dead-set on you got to push your comfort zones.

yoyoyoyoyoyoyoyoyo · Answer

First find what your strengths are.

Second, take note of the things about your character, or things you do, that you just love about yourself.

Then, you must embrace those things, and you will outshine the world

Kingofkings1992 · Answer

Girl, I used to be very shy too when I was a kid. It’s not easy to change your personality, but it can be done. You have to change your frame of thought. Make it more positive, less negative, and more outward, less inward.

Gwenhwyfar · Answer

I did it through sheer willpower. Forced myself to be more extroverted.

FakeName123 · Answer

Exposure therapy. Generally speaking almost anything that holds back people is best dealt with by exposing yourself to it and thus overcome. Aka you forcefully push yourself past your comfortzone. Just a bit, but enough to be out of it.

bowenw · Answer

Some people are shy. If you want to change consider joining a public speaking group like Toastmasters or an amateur theater group if there are some in your city. Take classes in drama at school if it's offered.

kinkyguy45 · Answer

Stop caring what other people think and just be you! Do what makes you happy! Others who think like you will find you and you’ll enjoy each other’s company and be happy

Anonymous · Answer

I’d say stop caring and just be you. Realize that you have a lot to offer, and you can show the world that.

J2ohhhhh · Answer

Just accept thay you're shy. It's not the end of the world. If you don't think about shyness as a disability, you can get quite far socially as a shy person.

SphynxUK · Answer

Why? Do you want to stop being shy? Shyness is an endearing quality. Own it. It’s part of what makes you you.

rosemilk · Answer

As you get older you learn to adapt. I had to because I needed a job. Certain times you have to speak up and not be shy. Just the way life is 🌸

Luckycharms12 · Answer

Get comfortable and confident in yourself it will come in time. We all can be shy

have_a_good_day · Answer

You're 16. Your body and your mind is still dorky. Give it time and stop trying to rush in order to be a grownup ffs.

collie22 · Answer

Pray to God asking him for courage, strength and confidence. In my dream he told not to be afraid

Wise4myage · Answer

Open up a little bit a time. Its very common to be shy, but you can't let it hold you back.

monkeynutts · Answer

It will change in time, you will become more confident.

G5TWA1 · Answer

I started making jokes to people, it's a good ice breaker, dunno if it helps

princeofromance · Answer

Do not be afraid to be yourself. You can do anything you put your mind to.

sparklerain · Answer

I think it's okay to be shy but not to the point where you miss chances or being stepped on It usually goes away when you know more people

lpoots · Answer

pick a word from the dictionary every day  and use it at least once in a coversation

Iron_Man · Answer

Practice talking to people on the site it will help you  out in real life but do it in private message That’s a big test

abhi75757 · Answer

Try to do something that which you are not also expecting

2021biguy · Answer

Don't worry, if that's you in the picture you are cute and you should be happy that you are attractive :) Just be confident in yourself :)

key_statistics · Answer

Before I can tell you anything I need to know why your shy

red_knight · Answer

Next time you have sex, dont be quiet... nake some noise, talk very dirty and moan as much as you want

28ouc · Answer

there is nothing wrong with being shy. i am also shy. what are you so shy about?

splashmustache · Answer

You can overcome shyness by solving your self-confidence problem.

jimmy2 · Answer

Omg you a beautiful woman. I was shy i missed a lot. I would say now just get out there and shine your beautifulness

Anonymous · Answer

I've never been shy but i understand shyness. Talk to yourself, say "This is just a feeling. It is the feeling of me coming to Life."

slatyb · Answer

Start saying hello. Worked for me.

tatianamay · Answer

I’m shy af gurll. Don’t worry lol

Annajamey · Answer

Find a boyfriend, you will change everything, lol

FunkyMonkee · Answer

Start hanging out with people that aren't shy.

Omario2049 · Answer

Open your mouth and speak.

anylolone · Answer

By starting acting not shy.

EaterPeter · Answer

Use 1 2 3 technique. Use positive affirmations.

Sambelfast198526 · Answer

Just be yourself and be comftable in your body.

Dinosaursandanime65 · Answer

Think like an animal

AmeerX · Answer

Why stop?

bananastandbae · Answer

Just talk to people

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