How do I tell my girlfriend to stop farting?

Question

Her deadly methane went up my nose!

My girlfriend farts. Loud! But the worse part is that it freakin smells oh oh so bad. Like dead rotten fish mixed with a dead skunk. One time she farted and I said it was cute so now she thinks its cute to fart all the freakin time. I might die from the horrible gas I'm inhaling at the moment.

How do I tell my girlfriend to stop farting?

David-NewZealand · Accepted Answer

Well its only natural, her digestion process produces gas and the natural process is for her to push it out just like any other human. She can't help how much gas she gets or how much it stinks. Did you know that its actually bad for your insides to hold in any waste including pee, farts and poops and can leed to you needing major operations to save your life. It is also known that so many girls get three times more gas than us guys and that generally a girls fart stinks worse because of higher levels of sulphur gases in the fart. However, if its all the time and smells as bad as you say I think she should go see a doctor as it could be some sort of health problem.

SunSeeker · Accepted Answer

Bro, this question just made me genuinely laugh. Thanks hahaha. Just tell her you appreciate clean air, a LOT.

Anonymous · Accepted Answer

I just watched a show today called, Shark Tank, on ABC.  The theme of the show is that inventors bring ideas to five investors & try to convince them to fund their idea.  Well, one guy had a wife with the same problem your girlfriend does, & he actually invented a special underwear that keeps the terrible smell of methane from leaving the underwear.  He said it saved their marriage.  I think he sells this product online, if your girlfriend is interested in looking at it.

yagurlnira768 · Accepted Answer

LMAO.

Anyway..you shouldn't have told her it was cute..but now just tell her otherwise..say it bothers you and you hate it. And try not to fart around her...and tell her to stop...

Or you could be mean and fart around her so she could smell...it...but I just think telling her in a serious way should stop the issue.

toulouse · Accepted Answer

tell her you would appreciate it if she could excuse herself when she feels the need as it is making you feel sick.

GroovyChips · Answer

Fart back. After a few good ones, she'll learn. Or you could just grow up and say babe, cut it out. From the question, I'd say growing up is something you need to do anyway.

jayrex · Answer

Tell her you made a mistake and you take it back.  Her cute farts have gone rotten and you can't take it anymore.  And also get a doctor's note to say it's bad for your health.

Billlewis · Answer

If I had a girlfriend who farted all the time, I wouldn't complain one bit... and if she kept farting, that would be pure heaven for me... lol

ShesRad80 · Answer

return fire on her

Shockerr · Answer

That's your fault for calling that shit cute. In my position i will lose all the sexual attraction i have towards her. Be straight forward with her about this.

NEOTUNIA2U · Answer

That is mean to say about your girlfriend to put her fart on blast.

Shaun · Answer

Here's the MSDS.

Lærke_k · Answer

Just tell her, and ask er politi and serious, to stop farting

Lucky1227 · Answer

Aww lol that sucks... and I have no idea how you would handle this..lol start doing it back to her.

Anonymous · Answer

you should have never her told her "it was cute", she got comfortable with you  and  now you have to pay lol

Sebers12 · Answer

Stop farting? It's nonsense! It's body fuction! Farting is inseparable part of life.

xcelint · Answer

I would kill to have a girlfriend like that

Mgcmicky1 · Answer

Lol NOSE plug

How do I tell my girlfriend to stop farting?

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