Long distance question?

[Anonymous]

I’m thinking about meeting up with this cool girl but she lives 2 hours away which is very very far for me is it ok to ask for sex the first day after I take her out. we’ve been pretty serious with the messages but I don't know I don’t want to waste time like that or maybe get caught going back and forth three times before I get some. And this isn’t a hit and dip I just want her to be sure I got everything she needs before I leave and don’t see her for another week or so. As a women if a dude drives far to see you would you give him what he wants if the vibe is ok

[sunflower00]

How long have you been speaking to her? Tbh it might put her off because it could give the impression that you just want sex or you’re only excited to meet her in person for the sex, rather than to get to know her.
From a girl’s perspective, when you meet up with a guy for the first time and he immediately wants sex it CAN be a bit off putting (depending on how you feel about it, if she wants to as well then it could be great).
I would say bring it up if you want to, but if she doesn’t want to do that don’t pressure her, don’t ask why, and don’t moan about it just respect her choice

[Asker]

Well only been talking to her for a week. But I’m ready to meet with her finally. she lives very far and even though that sucks I’m pretty much still looking for a relationship. You think she would appreciate that I came so far and will give it up? I’m good at taking girls on dates so I’m not worried about the day going bad it’s just if I should pop that question or not at the end. Also considering I’m someone she never met she most likely is not going to let me in her house. So I was thinking hotel but I don't know I feel like girls don’t like hotels unless it’s really nice. I just don’t want to go on three dates 2 hours away and come to find out she doesn’t want anything because I’m investing a lot of time and money

[sunflower00]

I mean…you haven’t been speaking to her for long at all, and most girls don’t want to have sex that quick/the first time they meet someone. The way you’re speaking about it as well seems a bit disrespectful? Like ‘will give it up?’ And so on. What is your goal, do you really like this girl and want a relationship or are you just focused on sex? Relationships do take time and effort, and if she doesn’t want to have sex the first time she meets you it doesn’t mean she’s not interested

[Asker]

I appreciate your response. We’ve been talking for about two weeks just texting but I feel like the texting is dying out so I just want to meet her already. not only do I think she’s beautiful and cool from what I’ve been texting with her. I just want sex the first day because of how far I’m driving (2hr) and I’m most likely spending at the least 100-300$ on some type of outing. Like I would love a relationship but if I don’t hit the first day I won’t see her for prob another week or two. (When I say hit or give it up I just speak like that I’m fairly ghetto but am very polite at the same time) I never had sex on the first date I just feel like this time it should happen this time considering my efforts to make this meet up happen.

[sunflower00]

Just because you’re travelling or spending money does not mean you’re entitled to sex - it’s not a transaction, and a week or two really isn’t a long time at all. Hopefully she will want to, but if she doesn’t that’s totally fine

[rachel776]

she already knows whether she wants to have sex with you so just ask on your first visit

[Asker]

Yea that’s my plan the thing is we met online so I have to play it different than usual I don’t think she’ll let skeins she just met in her house and the whole hotel thing I’ve never done it but let’s see what happens

[Asker]

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