How come women say they don't want controlling men but also a guy to lead the relationship?

[chris_987]

You can't complain that men are when you expect him to approach you, plan dates, kiss you, and have sex with you. Your basically telling a man that he should have authority over how the relationship goes.

[devilish-cutie]

I would say it means he is not controlling you as a person, not an issue if he takes charge
But i personally dont like men that 'lead'

[chris_987]

So in a relationship you never expected the man to do anything, I find that hard to believe

[devilish-cutie]

I never said that, you took it zo extreme. I said i dont like men taking the lead, not that i would not expect a man to make any effort w me. I prefer to control the situation but no relationship can work without both people putting an effort.

[chris_987]

I would argue that most women especially you don't like have control over the relationship. I've never been with a girl and she was like "hey where boyfriend and girlfriend now" girls always expect the man to make the major decisions in the relationship.

[devilish-cutie]

maybe most girls but i dont see why especially me? You dont even know me. I asked men on a date firsz, i told guys i liked them first, I touched them first so... For me personally I do expect an equal effort as well. I do prefer a guy to kiss me first but its not a rule. And i do think that men need to step up in certain areas but im very far from your stereotypical woman. But even those women do put an effort but you guys just dont get it, no guy would approach if they didn't stare at him and manipulate situations in order for him to realize he has a shot. Most men want to be 100% sure so I mean but who makes them sure than a woman? So im sick of you guys complaning you need to do everything, no you dont. its like a dance, you may be expected to 'lead' by most women but thats hardly doing everything.

[chris_987]

Would you like to get down on one knee and propose too?

[devilish-cutie]

its not a tradition and it would probably feel weird but id had no trouble saying to my guy i want to marry and for him to propose
Many couples I know actually got married upon initiation from a woman and in other cases men make very sure that is something she wants as well, so in the end proposing is formality like tradition
I generally am not that romantic so id definitely not want any grand gestures

[chris_987]

So are you in a relationship now