Why is my friend discouraging my relationship?

[SM29392]

I went to visit my friend the other day. I’ve recently met a guy and we are making lots of plans together. I told her about my new relationship and how excited I was about it and all she could say was negative things about it. We are in the early stage so texting all the time and calling each other. She kept saying things like ‘don’t worry if it doesn’t work out with him’ and I showed her a picture of him and she basically insulted him and made me feel really bad about the whole thing. She kept discouraging the relationship by asking ‘do you think he will be like guys you’ve dated in the past who were abusive to you?’ And kept saying ‘do you think he is creepy like most guys?’

Thing is, my friend has never been in a relationship with a guy. She doesn’t have much experience in dating. She’s only ever dated one guy and he turned out to be abusive to her

Why is she saying such negative things about my relationship and trying to discourage it?

[DaySpring]

because she believes what she is saying
That is her conditioning speaking to you (literally)
Her conditioning wants to get you and everything in her environment to be in harmony with it.

You have spend less time with her. You cannot hang around people constantly talking about what they don't want. The people you hang around have a huge impact on you.
You may not understand what I mean exactly but that thing I said isn't a cliche for nothing.

[caring__1]

Only she knows her reasons for discouraging your relationship, so it's best to get the answer from her. Unfortunately, based on what you shared, it appears she is projecting her past bad experience on all guys. You can ask her how she feels when she hears people lump her together with all girls, presenting assumptions as facts, even if they're not accurate.

[Mysticknght]

She or he could know something about that person that you don't, they could be jealous or they could like that person

[WhitneySnow]

Her perspective has taught her negative things about guys

[OlderAndWiser]

Several possibilities.

1. Secret lesbian crush on you.
2. She is afraid that you will spend all of your available time with the new guy and she won't see you very often.
3. She is jealous.
4. She is one of those "misery loves company" people and she wants others around her to be as miserable as she is.

[Guy13]

Ask her: jealous, crush you, never going to see you once you are immersed in guy⁉️

[Guy13]

Don’t ask her those things directly by keep an eye open for them when ask, “why is this guy and me a bad thing?” Make sense ⁉️

[Hardworkingguy]

Maybe she he or she is not telling you something about him

[In_Trance]

You'd have to ask her why