Please help, am I too nice to my ex?

[Anonymous]

I really need your guys help on this.. OK so I met my ex and I had no interest in him what so ever (which is why he was so keen on me) were talking I rejected him 5 times and finally gave into a date... while we were together and broken up he said I meant more to him then any other girl he'd been with (this is a lot for him because it is a player). Anyway he started acting really distant and question the relationship after a few months so we broke up because I said he makes up his mind and he couldn't. But because I was a bitch before we went out I was really nice when we were together and I think he got bored with me being overly nice... so my question now do I stay overly nice when I see him (twice a week) or so I have a bit of an attitude to make him want me back!?

[digital_haze]

I don't know if its me or what but I am utterly confused by your question.

"I really need your guys help on this.. OK so I met my ex and I had no interest in him what so ever (which is why he was so keen on me) were talking I rejected him 5 times and finally gave into a date..."

Had you dated before and broke up? was he your ex when you met up with him this time?

"Anyway he started acting really distant and question the relationship after a few months so we broke up because I said he makes up his mind and he couldn't."

Not really understanding what you are trying to say here, but you went out with a guy you werent interested in at all for a few months? Was this the second time you broke up or the first?

" so my question now do I stay overly nice when I see him (twice a week) or so I have a bit of an attitude to make him want me back!?"

Still confused here... Why are you wanting him back? You have no interest in him. You never actually said you liked this guy. All you said was you started to be nice after dating him (which doesn't mean you like him)

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So I'm gonna write out a quick version of what I Think you meant to write/ask and answer that. Hopefully that helps. If not ...oh well...

You met this player who you didn't really have any interest in. He was very persistent and after asking you out several times, you caved and said yes. After going out, you started to really like this guy and your attitude toward him changed, you became very nice and attatched. He got bored of this and you guys broke up. You still see him twice a week and you want him back and you want to know how you can do that. Do you continue to seem nice, and loving, and attatched, or do you play a little hard to get and make things interesting in order to get him back?

Soo... to answer that question. If acting nice and being boring lost him then why would you keep doing that? I'm not a fan of playing games but some people get bored easily and you gotta spice it up a little. So drop the nice act and be exciting again.

[Anonymous]

"(this is a lot for him because it is a player)" - Do you mean to say that _he_ is a player?

If so, I question his claim that you meant more to him than any other girl he's been with. That's just part of 'the game'.

[Anonymous]

sounds like my relationship (apart from me being a bitch lol). but seriously if he's not 100% into you now then will he ever be?!?!?! my guy dumped me and moved on with a bunch of other girls within a couple of weeks. once a player always a player...its all they know unless they find a girl that's really worth settling down for which is rare until their older and got it out of their system. by guy is almost 29! if he's not showing you interest and giving you what you need, its time to reassess and move on if need be.

[rachiee]

Don't give in completely, keep your guard up. But you also want him to know that you still care. I'd be a little standoffish towards him but I'd still show that I cared by flirting/joking around with him. Don't drop everything just to see him though, if he tries to hang out with you more tell him that you're busy. You don't want him to think that you'll always be there right away when he wants you to be.

[Anonymous]

Why do you want him back?

[Asker]

yes I do want him back, I obviously ended up falling for him but what are your thoughts on being too nice to him won't work?

[Opinion Owner]

Do you feel that he wants you back?

[Asker]

Hard to explain like I know he wants me back but if I go the wrong way about it he won't.. very delicate situation that's why I don't know how to act around him because he was first attracted to me when I had no feelings for him and now I don't know whether to act like that or as tho I still love him?

[Opinion Owner]

If I were you, I'll tell him that I still love him very much and will be happy if we get back together. Then, I'll wait for his response. If he loves you, he'll run for you. If he doesn't, then forget about him.