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I have this tense feeling in my gut, whenever I look/glance at this guy in my class. How do I get rid of this feeling?
Updates
+1 y
He forgived me, the classmate that I asked about :)
Does anyone think we have a chance to be friends after summer?
Does anyone think we have a chance to be friends after summer?
What Girls & Guys Said
Opinion
2Opinion
If he isn’t doing anything to you. The best thing you can do is just to avoid him. Obviously you sense something is off with this guy. We all get that feeling about people.
But. Pray for him. That’s what I do for people I don’t like. Is I pray for them
I can't avoid him, he's in my school, my class. How could I avoid him then? Could I confront him, telling him how I feel? I think I should, but I don't know if you think so.
Asker it depends on what he’s doing. If he isn’t doing anything and you confront him just for existing. It’s gonna make you look bad.
If you’re standing up for yourself. Then all power to you
Sometimes we have to be around people we don’t like. Part of life unfortunately
Yeah, but it's not possible for me to be around him, because of the discomfort.
And awkwardness.
More so discomfort, really.
Then asker you need to speak with a teacher or maybe the principal or some adult about how you feel.
What would you do if someone confronted you simply for existing someone you never did anything to….
Again if he’s doing something to harass you. Then by all means confront him. Otherwise tell your parents and tell a adult at school. If nothing can be done.
As I said all your life you’ll be around people you don’t much care for.
I did speak with someone, my counsellor and an adult about how I feel, The feeling is still there.
I wouldn't mind, to be honest. I'd be real with them, so why can't he do that? Maybe he doesn't have the courage to do that.
Asker…. Come on now. If he leaves you alone. Then you should leave him alone. If you go confronting him. Now you’re gonna have to talk to him…. And if he does be real with you…. Well now you see where this is going
What did they say about it when you talked to them?
You have a point there, but I am leaving him alone, that's what I didn't make clear. I'm sure he's going to be real with me, but what harm can it do to me physically? Now I'm not saying mentally or emotionally, but physically.
I didn't talk to them anymore since last month or so. Why?
I don’t know. If he is talking or doing stuff to pester you intentionally stand up for yourself. Otherwise don’t go out of your way to talk to him and start a problem because from there it will only get worse
He wasn't doing anything to pester him, but I still have the discomfort when he's around him, so I actually feel like I need to tell him about how I feel. I get what you mean, though.
Asker. I wouldn’t go out of your way to talk to him. Just leave him be you’ll be around. Pepe you don’t like your whole life.
Believe me I know how you feel. But he has as much of a right to be in the class as you do
Yeah. I've given him tons of space these last two months since he told me he can't give me the friendship I long for. But, here's an idea: I think I could talk to him on the bus, in September. I mean, it wouldn't hurt to try. Could it be possible?
I guess it could be, but i'm not sure if it is
Sorry it took me so long to respond. Why are you taking to him? Why are you wanting to be friends. I thought you didn’t like him
I'm not talking to him, I changed my mind. He forgave me a few days ago, so it's all good :)
Well, he seems like a nice guy after all, that's why
Well. I would leave him be okay.
For now, but, I'm talking about after summer
Would there be a chance for us to be friends, do you think?
What feeling?
Discomfort, that's what. And a bit of awkwardness.
But is it of nervousness from Jim being attractive for example or a bad feeling about him?
Bad aura, that's what. Lol
Also, that's the bad feeling that comes out from it.
Yep spiritual guidance gut feeling, I know it well, listen to it
But, I don't like it. How do I make it go away, if there's a way?
You listen to it
But what if I can't? It's a bad feeling anyways
Usually it saves you from things
Ehh, I don't think so. How so?
Because that feeling has been spiritual guidance, saved me from many things, saved someone I know as well, they had that bad feeling and they turned around and someone with a knife was behind him following him, I'd say learn to listen to that feeling.
Well, that's a different scenario for me. What else could I do other than listening to it? Cuz I don't think that's the best idea. How about confronting them?
I don't know, all I've ever done was listen to it so I don't know what else you can do tbh
Well, I don't think I'll do that. Who should I ask in RL? God, my parents, etc?
You can do all, but start with God
Yeah. Wait, any more advice on how to bond with a guy at my school? We're trying to be friends.
Just be yourself, I'm sure you'll be fine
How do I be myself with him?
Don't think too much about how you'll look infront of him, that's what stops you from being yourself and you start creating a fake persona around him
Okay, so basically, go with the flow when I'm talking with him?
Is it better to ask him a bunch of questions, as I'm trying to get to know him better, not like every second, but just some questions about his interests? Or is it better to listen to him, when we're talking?
Both, if you want to get to know him, do so, there's nothing wrong with that, don't overthink, that can not only be self sabotaging but self destructive as well.
Okay, that's helpful. Is it okay to go off campus with him, so, i don't know, like, to get a drink or something? I mean, we know some stuff about each other, and we've been in the same class semester. I think it might be a good idea, since we are getting to know each other. Should I go for it? To ask him if he wants to hangout with me off-campus, I mean.
If you want, that's already not for me to butt in but I personally don't see harm in it
I see. How about in a group, would that be better? We'll get to know each other better, while he's more comfortable with going off-campus in a group setting. But I'll also try to ask him if he wants to hang out with me off-campus to grab a drink
Whatever you want to do, that's already up to you lol
Yeah, i'll probably do that lol
Alright best of luck ha
Thanks, I guess?
I most likely didn't mean it the way you took it lol
You'll be fine 😂
Ohh, lmao
You added the ha at the end, that's why I took it the wrong way, but thanks for clearing that up
That ha is the "don't take it the wrong way" ha and unfortunately you took it the wrong way 😂
How can I be a good friend to him? Other than listening to him, being honest, agreeing to show up to places when we hangout, etc. Would it be possible to make him my best friend? Or a close friend, at least.
I think you mentioned everything necessary except that show up to places, you should always know where you are going in general
Yeah, I know the way to a bubble tea shop near our school anyways
But, is there a chance, that we could be close friends? If so, how do I make him one, of, you know
That is up to you, be yourself, not a fake persona that you get online, no one can be you so be yourself if the person like you for you then it should happen on its own
Yeah. Is it possible to make him my best friend?
Yes why not
How do I make him my best friend? And how often should we hangout? Like not in a group setting
Ex. once a month, twice a week, every other week, you get the point
Dude you are thinking too much about it, just follow the flow of the bond y'all have and don't go by statistics, love and friendships don't follow stats, it's random.
Bruh, of course I know that. I'm an over-thinker, that's why.
No really? I haven't noticed 😱
Nah foreal tho just wing it but don't be naive, you'll be fine 😂
Yeah, obvi. I know that already, wow, you're so smart
But yeah, i guess i'll wing it, like you said
Okay I deserved that fair play lol
Sounds like a plan 🤣👌
ha as if
but, yeah, it does sound like a plan
how do i build a friendship with him? sorry, i cannot overthink most of the time