Why would a girl text me at 6 am but appear cold and disinterested in person?

[Anonymous]

We're on the same course. She stared and smiled at me in class before. We messaged, she texted with laughing emojis talking about our studies and replied at 6 am animatedly with omgs and hahas. This made me want to talk to her more in person.

But in person, she is rather cold, I asked all the questions/make all conversation to her. She replies simply and rarely asks any questions to me back, instead chatting to our mutual female friend or using her phone when standing in groups with me. She never approached me - only I have done that.

(She is pretty quiet generally.)

What's going on?

[BigDaddyAndie]

I've been with the same type of girl for 7 years, and anytime she needs to talk or needs to tell me something, it's always through text message. She's been in so many messed up relationships, that she thinks this is the only way to talk about anything private, even if we're alone and spring next to each other. The only time she has ever talked outloud about anything private or personal is been during an argument, which to me is the worst time to scream private info but it's what i deal with. May be strange, but at least it's still communicating...

[BigDog1989]

Had you sent a text, and she just happened to have replied at 6 am? Or was she just texting you first?

[Asker]

She replied to one of my texts at 6 am (where I talked about an experience I had) with omg haha blah blah i can't believe that lol. I didn't want to text too much so
I don't text anyone at 6 which is why I was surprised. Then in person, just a cold fish. It was literally only the next day. I don't get understand.

[BigDog1989]

Yeah, she was just replying, at happened to be up. I wouldn't worry about it too much

[Alli39]

It sounds like she's just shy/withdrawn in person and has learned to be more emotive via text because it feels safer/more controlled. It's really hard to say if she (romantically) likes you or not, because just being happy/friendly isn't a good signal. But unless you're getting some major "go away vibes" then assume she's shy and operate based on that assumption.

[Asker]

We just locked eyes across the room this morning, I didn't want to but I couldn't control myself. I looked down at her in her direction, wanting to know where she was in the lecture hall; and saw she was glancing up at me from across the hall and a few steps below. I looked away.

Last week she really did make me feel she was uninterested. I approached her to say hi and she was replying but also walking away to our mutual friend. We got in the car with our friend driving, she changed seats to sit in the front next to our (friend driving) when she saw I was getting in the back next to her. Again, using phone during car trip, no questions back or conversation.

Today we locked eyes. when I was talking to a teacher she was standing right behind me (maybe to ask a question) but didn't say hello. When eating lunch with female friends she walked right behind us and past me out the doors and again didn't say hello either.

This is all fucking complicated. When I approach to chat, she closes off/doesn't engage in conversation/moves away. I don't want to try too much because I don't want her to feel uncomfortable. What about treating her like a cat? If she comes close, then be friendly, if not, wait for her to approach?

[Asker]

Thanks for the reply too.

[Alli39]

Maybe just ask her how she feels if it's really that confusing? Like, there's really not much anyone here can tell you since no one us know her.

[Nikki1989]

Texting and emojis, is this how people attempt to communicate these days?

Sad!

[Archferret]

There is nothing wrong with using texting and emojis to communicate. In fact, it can be a convenient and quick way to communicate, especially if you are not able to talk on the phone or in person.

[Archferret]

In this fast-paced world, being able to communicate quickly and efficiently is important.

[Archferret]

She was probably just checking to see if you were still alive!

So she texted you at 6am, either because she was bored, wanted to do some timepass, or had nothing else to do in life? Well, at least why she couldn't have waited until breakfast time!

[KrakenAttackin]

She is playing games with you. Switch your mindset from "relationship with her" to just "sex with her".

[jeffend888]

Not someone you want to be within 50 feet of.

[BoopBoopBeep]

She's too socially awkward. Move along.

[Asker]

Do you think she might like me?

[BoopBoopBeep]

Too hard to tell. I don't mess with autistic people.

[boobliker]

shy ness

[In_Trance]

Ask her and find out