Do women think that ignoring a man is a way of trying to control them?

[ManOnFire]

Had dinner this evening in D. C. with a few friends, one of which is a female who was talking about this with us. She proudly declared that a good way "to own a guy" as she put it, is to ignore him to make him more interested and try harder to please her, that way she's in control. She also was saying that women try to ignore men about other things all the time to make them feel irrelevant if she doesn't want to hear him. That was the only thing I agreed with her saying and I've said the same thing, but as far as her other ideas I was very surprised to hear a woman talking about ignoring men to try to own them. by the way she has been cheated on by two different guys.

What does everybody think? Do you think this is true?

[blueonblack22]

Women think this turns men on because that’s what turns them on. But most women are naturally more difficult in dating vs men in the exact same scenario due to biological differences. If she puts a conscious effort into ignoring a guy she actually likes then 9 times out of 10 it’s unnecessary and there is a good chance she could ruin a good thing.

It also likely these women had a bad past experience because they were once awestruck by some guy in the past. They wore their feelings on their sleeve, chased him and literally threw themselves at his feet (if the roles were reversed the guy would be considered a creepy stalker). And of course that didn’t ultimately work out too well for them.

Anyway all human beings have a “scarcity” complex about assuming something is higher value if it’s hard to get. Also being ignored can validate some people’s insecurity complexes or their egos can’t accept it. They chase more due to a self esteem problem vs. having legitimate attraction for someone. But mature people can know when it’s time to call it quits if someone is being too difficult.

Also there are still lingering after effects of all the #metoo bullshit that went down a few years ago. That movement brought about a few minor good societal changes in exchange for major damage given how it made men more risk averse. Now men are more likely to take a woman ignoring them as a hard no. It’s way too dangerous to take a risk of over pursuing women nowadays. They can lose their jobs or worse.

Anyway women need to up their game in western society. That doesn’t mean throwing themselves at the feet of guys they like. But smiling at them, saying hello and having a conversation isn’t “desperate”. Once a man feels safe given she gives him a clear message then he will be more emboldened to take it from there But he definitely needs a direct message and not to be ignored if the woman likes him.

I truly belief if women don’t pick up more slack in dating then single hood rates will continue to skyrocket. But many just don’t want to do it. They are either too lazy or too afraid but they HAVE to do more nowadays. I don’t think that very real factual trend of increasing singlehood rates is making anyone happier including women.

[ManOnFire]

I think it’s that women are too proud to do it. They are aware that they live in an age where people treat them and view them as if they're celebrities and so they act accordingly, feeling that if they’re already worshipped on a pedestal then putting any effort into speaking to guys or behaving with friendliness shows weakness or, as you said, what they think is an act of desperation.

So women would rather live in lock step with pride than to ever do anything that would make a man feel more inviting.

[blueonblack22]

Social media is a huge negative contributor to all of this. Virtual attention and likes give women a huge sugar high. They can substitute that more then men can. Most men don’t get that kind of attention on social media anyway unless they are legitimate (not pretend) celebrities.

One thing men got to STOP doing is following IG models (or worse OF models). If you zero chance of getting her in the real world then please block her. QUIT enabling that bullshit. Just quit it. Get a prostitute if you have to. Not saying that’s the best choice but at least you get something tangible for what you pay for. But QUIT liking, DMing or worse PAYING for the virtual attention. It’s a major fault of idiot guys to enable this. Huge fault.

But again singlehood rates are skyrocketing. That’s a cold hard fact. I can say beyond certainty that most men are NOT okay with that. But women are in denial about it and keep doing mental gymnastics to delude themselves otherwise. Then they take flaw comfort in social media and/or bs ideologies.

I am prepared to accept the harrowing possibility that it will take decades of misery and damage until women finally realize what real power they have, how they abused it and how it ultimately ruined things for both genders. A small and growing minority of women get this but most still don’t.

[ManOnFire]

Dude, that is literally everything I was telling some of the guys at work last week. How all these dudes keep filling up the Internet wanting these models and OF girls, it's so sad. There was even a pink anon on here a few days ago posting about how she loves attention more than having a man. That's like masturbation. Sad.

[blueonblack22]

Just wondering. And maybe it’s an exercise in futility. But if we started a change. org for guys to QUIT following models on IG, OF and TikTok would it gain any steam? Not saying they have to quit porn but just to quit enabling the other bs we discussed above.

You think guys would see the bigger picture at some point. But we are enabling this bs.

[ManOnFire]

It's a nice idea, but women on social media who practically need these guys to follow them like they need air and water, are going to take any concerted effort to stop following them as an affront, or "misogyny."

[blueonblack22]

The problem is men never take collective action on anything. We are literally labeled terrorists if we openly belong to a MRA group or something. We have a lot more to lose if we openly identify with something that is anti modern feminism. On top of that men who are supposedly on “our side” (Andrew Tate) was f*cking making and profiting off OF videos. He is the one influencer (only one maybe) who could motivate millions of men to stop this bs. Instead he exploited it for his own gain.

But still if we went into how damaging it is for men to enable IG, TikTok and OF models then I think some guys would think twice. I am not even asking them to give up porn. But quit enabling the female personality types we all absolutely hate.

[Vegasrunner]

Her statement has a lot of merrit to it however it needs a lot more context to understand. She's correct in my opinion assuming the dynamics are basic ie average guy smoking hot young chick. She ignores, the guy chases serving as entertainment. The part that is left out is that this strategy backfires w/ HV men all the time. Think about it logically, if I have a rotation of 3-5 women, a woman "ignoring" me never comes on my radar. What actually happens is after she realizes her ignoring doesn't result in attention, she becomes even more attracted.

[ManOnFire]

100% agree. I have done that too and I also noticed that ignoring those women made them become intrigued with me. You're right, it does backfire for them.

[hppygrl]

It’s human nature for both sexes to be more interested in the person who treats them badly 😩 There’s a level of maturity that it takes to realize that this is a foolish way to think/act. Luckily it is possible to find a good person and have a very happy marriage but it takes a lot of time to find.

[ManOnFire]

Has always seemed to be that women much more than men are interested in guys who treat them badly. It is foolish, but I don't think I will ever really understand it.

[mandyfire98]

Your friend might have a personality disorder lol. This is not normal. Normal people aren't trying to manipulate or control. That's the sign of a narcissist or anti-social personality disorder.

[OlderAndWiser]

I think your female friend has her head up her ass! I understand she has been cheated on twice, but that is not an excuse to treat people with disrespect. What she is describing in immature game playing; if I thought a woman was doing that to me, I would tell her to go fuck herself on the street corner.

[ManOnFire]

Right. Same for me.

[Keithfbx]

Do you have your ass over your head?

[Inbox]

@OlderAndWiser Yeah, if someone has to resort to extreme game playing just to keep a relationship alive,, that's a huge red flag.

[DaveJord]

Honestly that's how it makes me feel when she pulls the hot then cold act. Like all she is doing is playing games. Then question becomes why?

Is she hiding something, cheating, really disinterested.. l but then why when she kiss me so passionately, then went easy this and do that... but then blew off my text, get super difficult to make dates with?

Cut and run my man. That shit ain't right and she is toxic. Trust me. I have played every angle and come at this problem from every direction and tactic... if she making you feel anxious about her behave and insecure in your relationship... it a form of manipulation. If your ouch balance they can take advantage and they do it to you in purpose. Even if they mean to or not, they have a subconscious need to feel in control.

[Anonymous]

Yeah. But it's an amateur play. Most guys know this game with a woman. And most women do not hide their emotions very well. So if a woman has shown any interest at all in him and then starts dialing it back to get him to chase. It becomes very obvious what she's doing. So most the time she'll end up just offending him, or turning him off altogether. Either way his tells him by this act he's just a game to her. So even if he was attracted to her. He won't trust her anymore after this.

[ManOnFire]

Right. Like I always say, what a woman does/how she behaves tells you an enormous amount about what kind of person she is. That is what I pay attention more than what women say.

[Opinion Owner]

Absolutely💯 👍

[Joshydavid25]

That's playing games, and as a guy that's very straightforward and shows interest, I don't like mind games.. But a lot of women seem to.. I don't think healthy women think like that.. But then again she was cheated on twice, so I can imagine why she would resort to mind games.

[rgii55447]

All I know is if a woman doesn't seem interested in what I have to say, I'll just get bored and talk to somebody else. If she's trying to control me into leaving her alone, she's certainly succeeded.

[DextroShade]

She sounds like a moron. When we see a women ignoring us at best we assume she isn't interested and at worst we see it as deliberate disrespect. Either way it means she's a waste of time, I can see why she keeps getting cheated on.

[Fireguy17]

they can do what they want, I am just not really into games and will move on and find someone who is interested in me.

[spartan55]

Try that ignoring bullshit with any dude who has an ounce of respect, and they will dip

[LazerBean]

Sounds like the mentality of a person who is middle aged and still not in a successful, relevant relationship.

[ManOnFire]

Hence why I said she's been cheated on twice.

[Keithfbx]

Oh wow you sound bitter manonfire. You consider her a friend yet talk about her this way?

[yulbsari]

@Keithfbx I don't get the impression that she's a particularly nice person. Men or women who talk proudly about controlling people are toxic.

[Twalli]

If a girl ignores me I move on. So she loses any semblance of control she had over me, because interest is gone.

[pickles77]

Women are so insecure about feeling desperate. Like we just wanna be loved and you can bug us as much as you want 🤷🏻‍♂️

[Anonymous]

When a woman ingores me, it means she is eather not interested or she's playing head games. In either case, she is equally undesireable to me.

[Keithfbx]

I don’t get it. You should provide specific examples of what ignoring means.

[ManOnFire]

She was trying to say if a guy likes a woman she should ignore him because it will make him work harder to get her attention. And she believes that women should ignore men if men are saying things she doesn't want to hear.

[Keithfbx]

Well it depends what exactly he’s saying that she doesn’t wanna hear and it depends what you mean by ignore. Does ignore mean totally ignore his texts for days? It could mean so many different things.

[ManOnFire]

I guess for you as a woman it would mean many different things. But no woman should be ignoring anything he's saying if she doesn't want to be treated the same way.

[Keithfbx]

Ok well I still don’t understand because it could mean something different to you than me. So I’m
Not sure what kind of communication you are doing here with me because you still haven’t been clear what you mean.

[ManOnFire]

I don't think you would understand it even if I had to break it down more. Everyone else gets it but you.

[DaBiggestBird]

That’s like serving the president dry steak

[Joker_]

yeah lol women always ignore @Worst

[Worst]

lol...