How do I know if a girl truly loves me, and isn't just saying it?

[HouseMoat]

She'll say it but, how do I know

[Tren58]

Don’t stress too much. As long as her words and actions match what you need and want from a relationship, enjoy it. Be who you want to be in the relationship and give her what you want back.

[HouseMoat]

So, how do I know if they match?

[Tren58]

What does love look like to you? How do you feel loved best? Assuming they are normal and reasonable desires, you need to communicate those things to her. You also need to know how she likes to be loved. And you need to reciprocate those things to each other. If there are things that can be tweeked by each other you also need to address those. That is what love is. Without communication and action, it’s just chemistry and hormones ruling the relationship. Which is fun, but that doesn’t last and it’s not love. Love is a choice you make every day. If she chooses to love you, you need to take her word for it and trust her. If, she doesn’t show you love and only says it, talk to her. If she won’t show you love after that, it’s time to move on to someone you are more compatible with.

How long have you been in the relationship?

[HouseMoat]

That's the problem. It's not really even a relationship, but, it's also not "just friends", if that makes sense at all

[Tren58]

I may need more details to give specific enough advice. Someone can definitely be in love with someone they aren’t in a committed relationship with. But, your situation doesn’t seem general. Did she tell you, and now you’re trying to decide what to do with the relationship?

[HouseMoat]

She has told me she likes me, even loves me, I'm just not sure if she's "in love" with me, or if she just likes "saying it", if you know what I'm referring to

We have kissed, but, that's about it

[Tren58]

How do you feel about her? Before she told you she loves you? I had a boyfriend that told me he loved me when we hadn’t been going out long. I was shocked, but didn’t want him to feel bad. So I reciprocated. We were real young, and I had convinced myself that I was then in love with him, so the breakup was hard just 3 months later. I then found out he was trying to date other girls that whole time and flirting with them. That’s an example of actions and words not matching. Also, he wouldn’t show me affection in public. He acted like we were just friends. That’s an example of his behavior not matching what I needed in a relationship.

I think if I were you, I would really think about her and what you want from her. Then talk to her about what she wants from you and come to a decision. I can’t imagine telling someone that I love them and not wanting to be in a real relationship with them. So, you need to just start having honest communication with her.

[HouseMoat]

Depends on what she means when she says it

[RoseySarah]

You don't have to trust her or just accept she is saying what you want to hear!

Maybe talk about the future to much agreeing is a red flag.

[bededazzle]

don’t overthink it. you’ll know if she’s there for you, especially if you go through hard times

[NathanDavis]

you might be doubting yourself... more than you're doubting her... think about it