Is she interested or just curious?

[Anonymous]

I work with a girl who I find attractive. I'm not really pursuing because I feel like she's not interested. I have noticed that when I'm talking to her, her eye contact is fairly normal and we have regular conversations but when I'm looking at something I've noticed in my peripheral that she stares me and I've had people tell me she stares. Is she interested and maybe a little nervous or just curious? I ask because I'm a little confused and also don't want to waste my time if there's not really any potential.

Interested

Curious

Entertaining to watch

[Gym_Bro]

Try wearing a nice bulge in front of her. And if that scares her away because she's assuming you have a medical condition, then call her:

"Hey, I wanted to be bros forever with you but you're acting distant for some reason. If my everlasting pump worries you, chill. I just crushed my pre-workout before hitting the gym this morning, and now I'm dealing with some 'unfavorable circumstances.' It's not a big deal, bro. The pre-workout just got me extra motivated, and now I'm facing the consequences, but it's all good. No toxic chemicals, just some nitric oxide boosting the blood flow."

When she inevitably asks about the mysterious pre-workout, you respond: "The pre-workout didn't make me pump iron, but it sure as hell got me pumping... tires, bro! I hit a fork in the road, literally, and had to change a flat. The adrenaline, the pumping, it was like a pre-pump before the actual pump in the gym. But enough about tires, let's grab a protein shake and talk about maximizing our gains. No funny business, just two bros strategizing."

And if she's still curious or concerned about the erection situation, you can casually mention: "As for the erections, well, the pump was intense, and sometimes these things happen. It's a side effect I'm willing to endure for the gains. But don't worry, it's not like I'm pitching a tent over here. Unless it's a pre-workout tent, then yeah, that's definitely up."

Keep that tent flying high, bro! And remember, if she still doesn't take the bait, then she might not be worth your time. There are plenty of other fish in the sea who will appreciate your unique brand of charm.

[TommyMountainFigure]

The way to cut through all the staring and not knowing is, (at least my way to do it is) :-

Walk over to her and say "we keep staring at each other. I just thought it would be nice to stare at each other a bit closer." Then smile and walk off.
If she's interested she will come over to you.. If not, she'll be embarrassed for a while and carry on staring when she thinks you aren't looking.. So no harm done!

[Kelley1]

Typically women don't show any interest if they are not attracted to the guy. However, since you work together, she is going to be polite. If you believe she is not interested in more than a coworker relationship, she is not interested and you are just imagining things hoping that it is otherwise. Regardless, it is a woman's responsibility to make the first move by smiling and saying "Hi" and other things to indicate she is willing to be approached. That means she will do a bit more than the minimum as a coworker.

However, near lunch time, it is okay to ask her if she has plans for lunch. If she is interested, she doesn't have plans even if she does. If she is not interested she will let you down easy by telling you she already has plans even if she doesn't.

Alternately, ask is she has a boyfriend. If she is interested she doesn't have a boyfriend or nothing serious. Otherwise, she has a boyfriend even if she doesn't.

[Jeanne_neko]

I think she can be nervous or scared also because i used to do this with my frnd (who is my boyfriend now) even after a year i couldnt make a move and i used to act like im not interested because i was sm nervous i used to look at him when he's busy doing things and kept admiring him from distance but thanks to him he realized and made a move and we r in relation now

[Asker]

Dang, it took a year? I also think she's really not interested and being nice, there's a few things like this that make me question it. But, her grandma works here she's the main person who's saying she's interested.

[HappyWoman34]

Sounds like she’s keen.

[kellytheman]

She must be interested at least a little if she stares at you. Also if you guys have nice conversations as coworkers maybe you can out to lunch and really guage her and see if she really likes and interested in you.

[Nikki1989]

Another guy that thinks some eye contact counts for something.

Crikey!

[Kaylei2006]

Omg, so right

[Sushi2405]

Actually, we women are scared to tell that we are interested in you. No matter how mad we are for you generally we won't let you know.

[Anonymous]

Maybe some women just like to tease or take a sucker for a gullible entertainment - as in, pulling your leg, harmlessly, and has no qualms about it. I won't be comment replying. Kindly

[noohair]

My Father had a rule that you don't mess around with any women you work with. It was excellent advice. If you have to eliminate one woman or 10,000 women from the dating pool, so be it. I have seen many men destroy their work career this way.

[CrabCakes11]

She’s probably interested in you, whether that be platonic or romantic.

[sheikalana]

She’s just being friendly to you. You’re thinking way too much.

[Kaylei2006]

Right, I just talk to anyone, it does have it downside :(

[sheikalana]

@Kaylei2006 that’s why a lot of us prefer to keep our distance from guys. If you’re nice/friendly to them they start thinking we’re into them. How creepy.

[codytoe]

Is that how a female is likely to take it should I happen to smile and say hi if I'm walking past? Because I've noticed this is met with a whole spectrum of different results. Anywhere from ice cold "I don't even see you" to "really friendly returned greeting" in concert with a big smile. I honestly don't assume that someone returning a greeting means anything more than them being polite, there's nothing in my head which goes "OMFG she said hi maybe she wants to jump my Bones!"

[codytoe]

I could totally see how guys would fuck this up for ourselves though lmao

[Kaylei2006]

@codytoe - i see at them weeding themselves out!

Stick with the "really friendly returned greeting" lol

[sheikalana]

@Kaylei2006 I agree. Do not assume anything unless we tell you that we're interested.

[DrPepper12]

Why are you here instead of shooting your shot with her? End the confusion.

[Anonymous]

Unless she's contacting you outside work she's likely just bored at work.

[DreamLife7]

You having to ask us means she's not interested

[Asker]

Why do you say that?

[DreamLife7]

When someone likes you , you don't have to ask.

[Asker]

That makes sense! I think I'm asking because I feel like she's not interested, but her grandma works at the same place and she's the main person telling me she's interested.

[DreamLife7]

Then she's not interested obviously