Am I right to feel like my friends dont care for me?

[Anonymous]

This is my first ever time asking a question on this website, so i dont really know how to use it properly. My problem is, that i feel like none of my friends care about me. I have four close friends, who I've been friends with for several years already. we have a groupchat together, and we chat on there regularly. but lately I've noticed that everytime i hangout with them, its always when we go as a group with all of us, never just me and one other girl. I just feel so left out, because all of them constantly hangout with each other and send pictures of what they did together (eg: cooking, shopping, watching movies etc). i do ask them sometimes if they want to hangout, but it always ends in a "maybe" or "im busy". because of that, i feel like they just dont like me/ dont really care about me. i dont know if im the problem or if maybe they just like each other so much more than me. i dont have anyone else i can tell this too, as the rest of the friends i have aren't that close to me, and i dont think they would really care if i told them. what should i do?

Updates

1 y

Thank you to everyone who replied to me, i read all of your replies and iv decided that im going to try and talk to them one last time before making my final decision :) thank you for taking your time to give me your advice

[SueShe]

When you start doubting about the true friendship of those individuals because of the feedback they give you, because you feel left out or because you think that you are not good enough for them, then it is indeed because somewhere, there is a problem.

Take a minute to think what the reasons could be. Are you the one that joined last? Often, the last member of a group may be seen as an intruder disturbing the integrity of a well greased mechanic. Are you extroverted or rather introverted? Do you take initiatives or are you rather passive?

All those elements together may make it that you are perhaps still perceived as an outsider. Your presence is tolerated as long as you pay, as long as you serve them, as long as you remain silent.

This group is toxic and you should really ask yourself whether it is worth your time and efforts to remain in that group if you don't feel 100% integrated.

[Asker]

i became friends with two of them when we were in the 7th grade, and in the 9th grade the two other girls joined us. I dont think im not good enough for them, but i am much more introverted. Theyre all pretty extroverted girls, but there was a time where i was really extroverted and always made plans and they were more introverted. But during that time we still hung out one on one very often and no one was left out. We are all in our senior year, and in a few months ill graduate. Im beginning to really consider to cut all of them off once i can, but i dont want to have no friends at all.

[ClassicDropout]

I'd say just keep asking because you'll find your answer on your own that way. Either you find a time when they're not busy, or they get annoyed because they have to keep making excuses to not hang out with you. In that case, those aren't the close friends you should have. It should never be a chore to spend time with the people you like.

[Avicenna]

Is it more fun for you to hang out with just one other person?

[Asker]

not necessarily, but the fact i only ever hang out with them when were all together makes it seem to me that they only ask me because it would be super rude of them to hangout all together without me, like, i think even they know it would be something very visibly rude to do

[In_Trance]

Talk to them