If I had a connection with a girl on Snapchat then I got her phone number and she expressed wanting closeness, what are my next steps?

[Anonymous]

[HollyK21]

The polite thing to do would be asking her out, if you’re mutually interested.

[Asker]

Truthfully I didn't know if she was interested because the dynamic is layered. I kinda friend zoned myself

[HollyK21]

In all honestly I’m not sure what she means by wanting closeness, mainly because I don’t know the dynamic of your relationship. Like if you’ve been distant or something as a friend she could mean that she misses the attention, connection, whatever you wanna call it. It could also be a sign that she wants you to have the courage to step out of the friendzone, who knows. In any case though I’d say if there were ever a chance to redeem yourself and try your luck, it would be when she’s dropping hints. Don’t be afraid of losing because rejection isn’t gonna kill you and if anything it’ll let you know exactly where you guys stand so that you can act accordingly. I mean imagine hanging out in the friend zone thinking/hoping that somethings gonna change, only to find out later down the road that it was a waste of time you can’t get back. I’d rather avoid that if I were you.

[Asker]

I agree with everything you said

[Summeroflove]

How well you know her? Take things at their own pace don’t let it go too fast

[Asker]

We are familiar and comfortable with each other but I don't know her too deeply. We talked a lot, and I basically friend zoned myself.

[Summeroflove]

Well never taking any steps and rejecting her steps that’s a sure way to cause disinterest

[Asker]

What steps did she take?

[Summeroflove]

Expressing she wanted closeness?

[Asker]

I see. You don't think her wanting "closeness" is vague?

[Summeroflove]

Ask for clarification

[beenherebefore]

Closeness as in dating?

[Asker]

I don't know. We weren't dating and she was vague in what she meant

[beenherebefore]

Yea that sounds very cryptic, even I don't know what that means.

[Asker]

Right because "close" sounds like close friends

[beenherebefore]

Yea could be being friends or getting to know each other. Ask her to clarify what she means.

[Asker]

I will. Do you think when she said that I shouldn't have asked her to hang out?

[beenherebefore]

I mean she was not specific and she shouldn't expect you to guess what she meant.

[Asker]

I guess she didn't know what she wanted as well. I got her number and we were texting and she said it. It probably felt good in the moment to say it

[slatyb]

Plan a date, then call and invite her.