My boyfriend does not want to meet my parents, why?

[Anonymous]

My boyfriend and I have been together for over a year. I have already met all of his family, but 3 days ago when I asked him to meet mine he said it would be awkward because he and my brother do not like each other. The reason my brother does not like him is because in the past my boyfriend cheated on me, 3 years later we decided to give things a try again. My brother sent him an email telling him he did not want him talking to me. Since then my boyfriend does not like my brother, in one occasion I tried bringing them together by placing them in the same party. That was a mistake since my boyfriend told my brother that he was still waiting for an apology for the email he sent him, my brother refused and said he did not owe him anything, and they were about to get in a physical fight. My brother says he does not have a problem with my boyfriend, but my boyfriend demands an apology from my brother for the email. I broke up with my boyfriend because he did not want to meet my parents and come around my family. He has not even tried talking to me or anything, why is he acting this way? Did I make the right choice?

[LexiNinja]

Your boyfriend shouldn't be mad at the fact that your brother sent him that email. If anything, he somewhat deserved it at the moment, I mean come on, lets get real he cheated on you. I don't know what world your boyfriend is living in, but an apology doesn't seem fit in this situation seeing that he put himself in this position. I think if your boyfriend really cared though, he would put everything behind him for the time being and at least being cordial with him when meeting your parents. The fact that he's being sort of cold towards you for wanting him to, really doesn't make any sense. I say talk to him about it. Really, a problem such as little as this shouldn't even be a problem.

[Asker]

Thanks, but m now ex boyfriend thinks I am manipulating him. That is exactly how I see it, but to him it is a huge demand and problem that brought our one and a half relationship to an end.

[CatholicVirginia]

Your boyfriend needs to learn to respect your family. He made a mistake and he should LOVE that your brother is protecting you. Your boyfriend's causing problems.

You made the right choice. If your boyfriend loves you, he will try to work it out with your family. He should want you happy.

[madhatters4]

you need to talk to your brother and your boyfriend. Tell your Boyfriend your brother doesn't need to apologize for doing what a brother is supposed to do. Tell your brother that although this guy cheated on you, you want him to give him a chance.

All that said, your boyfriend needs to man up. He made a mistake in the past and now he thinks that since you forgave him all is well. He needs to establish a relationship and trust with your family not vice versa. He needs to put himself in the uncomfortable position of your family. It is the only way things will only get better between him and the fam.

[Asker]

I did, he still refuses because he thinks it will be awkward. He has not spoken or attempted to since I broke up with him. I am guessing he did not really care for me as much as I thought he did :(

[madhatters4]

relationships often require either person to put themselves in positions that are awkward or slightly uncomfortable. Add to that infidelity and it compounds that awkwardness. If he's not will to make the effort then he probably isn't worth it.

[alamkhiam]

gues so,.. what if he cannot make right with your family memberss how would thinhs go well later,. may be , he's not reaaly into it or doesn love you truely. on the contrary, if he really love's you why not he can't , and what's so abot the mail, can't he forgive fro a single, silly stufs,.. for me, you did the right choice.

[Asker]

Hate to admit it, but I think you're right when you say he is not that into me. I mean I thought he was, I tried to do everything to make him happy, but when I asked him to do something out of his comfort zone for me, he got away.

[Dionysos]

Your boyfriend is an a**hole, first for cheating and second for being a p**** and demanding your brother apologize for sticking up for you. You were right to kick him to the curb.

[Asker]

Thans

[Anonymous]

Why don't you ask him? Maybe he is very hesitant to mess up, other problems. Ask him.

[Asker]

I did, he said he didn't want to come around my family because he is afraid things will escalate with my brother. I told him that my brother honestly has no problem with him, but he demands an apology from him to come around the family. My brother saw me really sad today and offered to talk to him and tell him he has no problem with him, but I told him no because that is something he is supposed to do.

[alamkhiam]

ya you are rght, he got no self esteem/

[Anonymous]

Leave that Ahole